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Well I'M not sending it back because it's not MY problem. She is H's kid and he can deal with it and she left because he upset her. It's not up to me to make anything right. Plus, if she wants it back so badly, why isn't SHE the one texting H, or even me, for that matter? Why is her mother doing all of it?? Maybe if she had the balls to ask H for it he might actually send it to her as it would open a line of communication, but SD is simply shirking it off on BM since she doesn't want to do it. Just like everything SD doesn't want to do and BM does for her.
Based on your emotions and feelings, you should inform H? by phone or in-person that H's kid is allowed to contact you to work out an arrangement to pick up those materials for you and should Paypal/Venmo you money first and for no other reasons unrelated?). You should explicitly tell them what you said about how it's not your problem and that you feel that you expect respect directly from the individuals that should be involved about their own stuff. Spell things out directly and explicitly as necessary. I don't think can uninvolve yourself cause they made you more involved. So, just continue to stand up for yourself and only send stuff back appropriately on your own terms respectfully. You know you won't get the respect, so just continue to offer those other people solutions to build your respect for the process in order for you to send the material back they need. You can also state that you have no interest in developing a rapport with so and so outside of gaining enough respect to send the materials back to said person.
Nope! I've never enjoyed her and she's barely been a part of H's life since I've know him. She came over maybe 5-6 weekends a year before she turned 18 (and that's being generous). Now she is on a wrong way track to nowheresville and we have never had anything in common. She lies, she talks about things she knows nothing about and can't stand it when you correct her because she doesn't have the info about something she swears she's knowledgeable on. Now H seems to be fine not having her in his life because all she does is create drama. And, according to her, she will never have kids so no grandkids to worry about!
So that answers GiGI's question … you're doing this out of revenge, to stick it to this evil, no-good stepdaughter.
Sure, HE could do it, but to act as if you have no influence over your own husband is disingenuous and, yes, petty.
Tell your husband that they're harassing you and he needs to deal with it.
If they contact you, tell them to talk to your husband.
You don't have to deal with this.
Tell your husband that they're harassing you and he needs to deal with it.
If they contact you, tell them to talk to your husband.
You don't have to deal with this.
And tell your husband to do what he already said he would do. SD isn't the only one to blame for drama.
OP, in all of your posts in this thread something you've said consistently is "It's not my problem."
So, what IS your problem? Obviously it can't be about anything as insignificant as some other person's dirty old teddy bear and another person's borrowed dress. Why are you posting on the forum about something unimportant that isn't your problem?
Are you posting because you're just really angry at your husband and his ex-family and you wanted a place to vent about it? Is it also because your husband is still allowing himself to get angry and worked up about his ex-wife even after he has re-married to you?
I think you should forget about the silly teddy bear and dress - remember, they are not your problem and are not important - and try to resolve your more important issues that are really bothering you about your own relationship with your husband.
I noticed in one of your last posts you complained about your stepdaughter "not having the balls" to deal with your husband and turning to her mother to do it for her.
What happened to your own balls in standing up to him and dealing with him yourself? Are you afraid of him?
If you aren't afraid of him then tell him if he doesn't deal with the damned teddy bear and dress RIGHT NOW in order to put a stop to all the STUPID drama that you will throw them in the trash and be done with it.
If you are too afraid of him to stand your ground then that is the real problem that you have to deal with. Not his ex-family.
OP, in all of your posts in this thread something you've said consistently is "It's not my problem."
So, what IS your problem? Obviously it can't be about anything as insignificant as some other person's dirty old teddy bear and another person's borrowed dress. Why are you posting on the forum about something unimportant that isn't your problem?
Are you posting because you're just really angry at your husband and his ex-family and you wanted a place to vent about it? Is it also because your husband is still allowing himself to get angry and worked up about his ex-wife even after he has re-married to you?
I think you should forget about the silly teddy bear and dress - remember, they are not your problem and are not important - and try to resolve your more important issues that are really bothering you about your own relationship with your husband.
I noticed in one of your last posts you complained about your stepdaughter "not having the balls" to deal with your husband and turning to her mother to do it for her.
What happened to your own balls in standing up to him and dealing with him yourself? Are you afraid of him?
If you aren't afraid of him then tell him if he doesn't deal with the damned teddy bear and dress RIGHT NOW in order to put a stop to all the STUPID drama that you will throw them in the trash and be done with it.
If you are too afraid of him to stand your ground then that is the real problem that you have to deal with. Not his ex-family.
.
I have no desire to tell him to send it back to her. It can disintegrate in the closet for all I care. I think of how many things has she gotten that end up getting lost under a pile of crap or unused when she begged to have them and then can't take care of anything or loses something. No different with the teddy bear. If it's out of her sight for awhile she won't care about it anyways. Good for him for not sending it back! I just don't want to be bothered by BM with texts to please send it back, when it's not even hers anyways, which is why I blocked her.
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