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I did say that I tried to call - their phone is disconnected. Check.
I'm not sure if I clarified this, but they do not engage in social media (FB, Instagram, LinkedIn, etc.) Their only other contact is email - I have emailed back-and-forth in the past; my last email (prior to the pandemic) was unanswered. Check.
Moreover, I had called in the past - left messages, no returned calls.
I clearly saw my two cousins, and I'm 99.9% sure that they recognized me - in the past, they could pick me out in a crowded stadium, even if I were sitting waaaaay over on the opposite end. We were very close once upon a time and loved one another.
So with that, knowing what I look like, what I sound like, I just find it very odd. A couple of folks said that I should have gone to the local police and had a welfare check done. I guess I'm a bit reticent because I didn't want to make a mountain out of an ant hill, discover that all was well, and have my aunt/cousins pissed off at me!
OTOH, and maybe I'm overthinking this: as I said before, there's not many of us left in my family - and I wanted to just take 5 minutes and say a quick "Hello". No harm, no foul, no ulterior motive.
What was your conversation with them the last time you ever had contact?
I did say that I tried to call - their phone is disconnected. Check.
....
OTOH, and maybe I'm overthinking this: as I said before, there's not many of us left in my family - and I wanted to just take 5 minutes and say a quick "Hello". No harm, no foul, no ulterior motive.
Just out of curiosity, how many times did you try to call them? When was the last time you had any interaction with any of them?
To answer questions of the posters: Our past conversations were friendly, familial, no issues...we'd kept in sporadic contact after my dad passed away in 2009. As stated, my aunt was my dad's younger sister, and we'd always gotten along quite well.
When I got married in 2010, she called to congratulate me. Unfortunately, my marriage went bust, but that's another story - we still kept in contact off and on thru phone or email.
Her (now grown) children - my cousins - used to always ask about me, as I'd spent some time there. When I lived in S.C. (where they live), I lived maybe three blocks from them - this was '89, '90, '91. Even after I moved back north, we remained in contact. No issues, no tension, The kids had always loved their "Cousin Rick". I practically watched them grow from children to young adults.
Now, hypothetically speaking, let's say that my aunt did pass on (I hope not!) In our family, there was NEVER an issue of "who got what" after someone died. I can say this with 100% certainty: No one ever fought or argued about the deceased's material possessions - we just wanted the person back! - and none of us were ever rich or "well off"; we were working class. Her late husband (my uncle by marriage) was a retired NYC police officer; the kids (when they got older) worked different jobs (my one cousin served in the Navy) no one had "riches", but we were content with what we had.
And once again, in that brief visit, my intention was to remain outside, and communicate utilizing social distancing! Just a quick 5-10 minute "Let's talk later..." and/or "Let's get together after this COVID crap is over." Just letting 'em know that I'm still alive - and making sure that they are also.
ItsRick24, I still think that there are two issues at one time: (1) an unexpected in-person visit from someone who they hadn't seen in a long time, which might get an unusual reaction from anyone, and (2) some issues on their end- either something bad happened or they're doing something bad.
To answer questions of the posters: Our past conversations were friendly, familial, no issues...we'd kept in sporadic contact after my dad passed away in 2009. As stated, my aunt was my dad's younger sister, and we'd always gotten along quite well.
When I got married in 2010, she called to congratulate me. Unfortunately, my marriage went bust, but that's another story - we still kept in contact off and on thru phone or email.
Her (now grown) children - my cousins - used to always ask about me, as I'd spent some time there. When I lived in S.C. (where they live), I lived maybe three blocks from them - this was '89, '90, '91. Even after I moved back north, we remained in contact. No issues, no tension, The kids had always loved their "Cousin Rick". I practically watched them grow from children to young adults.
Now, hypothetically speaking, let's say that my aunt did pass on (I hope not!) In our family, there was NEVER an issue of "who got what" after someone died. I can say this with 100% certainty: No one ever fought or argued about the deceased's material possessions - we just wanted the person back! - and none of us were ever rich or "well off"; we were working class. Her late husband (my uncle by marriage) was a retired NYC police officer; the kids (when they got older) worked different jobs (my one cousin served in the Navy) no one had "riches", but we were content with what we had.
And once again, in that brief visit, my intention was to remain outside, and communicate utilizing social distancing! Just a quick 5-10 minute "Let's talk later..." and/or "Let's get together after this COVID crap is over." Just letting 'em know that I'm still alive - and making sure that they are also.
Hope this clears it up better.
Right, but they had no way of knowing the bolded, because you didn't include in your greeting, "Just stopping by on my drive south to see if you're ok. I couldn't get through by phone."
It might not have made any difference, though. If it was a bad time for them to see family, if only for 5 minutes, it was a bad time. Have you tried their phone number more recently?
Right, but they had no way of knowing the bolded, because you didn't include in your greeting, "Just stopping by on my drive south to see if you're ok. I couldn't get through by phone."
It might not have made any difference, though. If it was a bad time for them to see family, if only for 5 minutes, it was a bad time. Have you tried their phone number more recently?
I did. Disconnected still. I just shot out an email letting them know that it was in fact me at the door. Maybe I should have been more specific, but I just wasn't spared the time...
Incidentally, I just did a Google search on my aunt. No death or obituary notices (Thankfully!) Listings have her still living.
I don't make it a point to show up to anyone's house unannounced, but as I stated, I DID try to call - their phone is disconnected. Past emails went unanswered, and they do not engage in any social media.
Also, my intention was to stand outside and remain outside, and not enter the house; just a "Hey, how have you been?" and after some small talk, arrange to communicate via phone at a later time, to arrange getting together after the pandemic.
To answer questions of the posters: Our past conversations were friendly, familial, no issues...we'd kept in sporadic contact after my dad passed away in 2009. As stated, my aunt was my dad's younger sister, and we'd always gotten along quite well.
When I got married in 2010, she called to congratulate me. Unfortunately, my marriage went bust, but that's another story - we still kept in contact off and on thru phone or email.
Her (now grown) children - my cousins - used to always ask about me, as I'd spent some time there. When I lived in S.C. (where they live), I lived maybe three blocks from them - this was '89, '90, '91. Even after I moved back north, we remained in contact. No issues, no tension, The kids had always loved their "Cousin Rick". I practically watched them grow from children to young adults.
Now, hypothetically speaking, let's say that my aunt did pass on (I hope not!) In our family, there was NEVER an issue of "who got what" after someone died. I can say this with 100% certainty: No one ever fought or argued about the deceased's material possessions - we just wanted the person back! - and none of us were ever rich or "well off"; we were working class. Her late husband (my uncle by marriage) was a retired NYC police officer; the kids (when they got older) worked different jobs (my one cousin served in the Navy) no one had "riches", but we were content with what we had.
And once again, in that brief visit, my intention was to remain outside, and communicate utilizing social distancing! Just a quick 5-10 minute "Let's talk later..." and/or "Let's get together after this COVID crap is over." Just letting 'em know that I'm still alive - and making sure that they are also.
Hope this clears it up better.
So 11 years since you spoke with her or am I reading this wrong?
So 11 years since you spoke with her or am I reading this wrong?
Yeah, I'm guessing that living nearby 30 years ago and "off and on" email correspondence since then means that the family doesn't consider it as close of a relationship (at least for an unannounced drop in) as the OP does.
So 11 years since you spoke with her or am I reading this wrong?
Less than 11 years. We've been in contact up until maybe a year and a half ago.
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