Raleigh vs Asheville (Durham, Cary, Chapel Hill: fit in, transplants, chapel) - North Carolina (NC) - City-Data Forum

waxwolf · 03-29-2011, 12:23 PM

Hi all,

I'm new to posting on this site, but I've been browsing for awhile. I'm from New York City, and currently living in Buffalo, but my girlfriend and I have been thinking of moving to North Carolina, in part because it's just too cold up here. I was hoping for some advice on what places to look at when we come to visit. I've been to Raleigh before and had a great time, but I've also heard a lot of good things about Asheville. So I'm focusing on those two, but if you have other suggestions, I would much appreciate them.

A little about us: We're a liberal, young (mid to upper 20s), interracial (black and white), lesbian couple. Depending on job availability, we'll probably be able to afford housing in the $300-$400K range. Our priorities look something like this (in roughly this order):

1. Non-discriminating environment: preferably the kind of town that has a decent ***** population and isn't largely segregated. Also, I'd rather not get too much - pardon my French - bonjour for being a New Yorker. I'm not the type to spout off on how much better New York is than anywhere else in the whole wide world, but I won't lie and say it doesn't sting when people say New York sucks.
2. Walkable/bikeable area: we both love walking around in parks, and I'm particularly fond of being able to walk from my home to a nearby cafe, restaurant, or bar
3. Good vegetarian food! - and good vegan food (the girlfriend is vegan)
4. Mild winters - it got down to 19 here in Buffalo yesterday, there is still snow on the ground, and my patience is starting to wear
5. Pro-artistic - we like going to art museums (I'm particularly big on modern art), theater performances, and more occasionally live music venues
6. Friendly people - politeness is nice, genuine warmth is nicer
7. Safety - This could be higher up, but I don't need to live in the kind of place where you can leave your doors unlocked, I just don't want to fear for my well-being when I'm walking down the street at night.
8. Local businesses - Chains are good for some things, but I like the uniqueness small businesses tend to bring to an environment
9. Shopping - Clothes, electronics, kitchen things, you name it!
10. Job availability - I realize this is a long shot, but an area without tons of dentists would be a plus. That's a hope for me, for my girlfriend, just jobs in general would be a plus

Wow, what a long list! Thanks for reading

The Man From Utopia · 03-29-2011, 01:01 PM

Durham/Chapel Hill/Carrboro would probably be a better fit!

RedZin · 03-29-2011, 01:01 PM

Well, I dunno.... that's a tough one. My first inclination is to give you a stupid answer....

You'll fit in fine in either place.

Truth is, I'd look at your job prospects, then go from there. I'm in Cary (just outside the Raleigh area) and there's a pretty sizeable GLBT population in Raleigh. And of course, being the capital and a college town, we are friendly enough... also... tons of transplants here. If you can stand people from NY/NJ, you'll be fine.

Asheville (and I do love Asheville) is smaller, and has a good-sized "crunchy" population. It isn't as large as Raleigh, though... I'd hazard a guess that if you were outside your general comfort zone, so to speak, you might find more people who weren't so open minded...

What I'm saying is you may have a larger stomping ground in the Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill/Carrboro area (especially Carrboro).

Just some stuff to consider. As long as you've got jobs in hand, either of the two will be fine. So, find the opportunities and come on down.

DanielleNC · 03-29-2011, 01:11 PM

I agree with the other posters. I think you will find more culture in the Triangle, as well as diversity and jobs. I love Asheville, but it just doesn't have as much opportunity. I think Durham comes closest in your description. Chapel Hill and Carrboro too, since it looks like you can afford it. Good luck!

waxwolf · 03-30-2011, 06:13 AM

Thanks for the advice. I will try to check out those other places as well.

Also, something I forgot to mention, a good comic book store is a plus (nerd alert much?) Especially if they have a decent non-super hero section (think Maus, Persepolis, Jeffery Brown). I guess there are usually more places like that in a larger city

QuilterChick · 03-30-2011, 07:48 AM

If you want to get away from winter, Asheville would not be your cup of tea. It snows, and it can be dangerously icey. You would not be exchanging much weather wise. Carrboro is a neat town, nearer to Chapel Hill for the college scene and cultural activities; "green" shopping, organics etc. Take a week and shop around the area, much more to do than in the mountains.

Also, a lot easier to get a better selection of flights back to the northeast.