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Old 09-21-2009, 10:25 PM
 
51 posts, read 73,217 times
Reputation: 23

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LOL this feels just like high school! I dont know if you guys purposely make it feel that way, or its just the culture of the boards, but come on lets be honest..Im no English major, but Im pretty confident that if challenged, I could break down the post and identify more than one term that could be construed as "un-welcoming" Ok..maybe I could use a better adjective..but it seems like you guys are just jumping to his defense because he's a "good poster". Im sure he is..but the comments came across as a bit abrasive! And to whoever posted the terms of service..thank you..but..she did not post an open ended question. She really is the one that should be having this discussion with you but perhaps she was put off by the arragont tone used by Francois. And I wasnt picking a fight!
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Old 09-21-2009, 10:31 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,712,871 times
Reputation: 40199
Quote:
Originally Posted by dealmaker74 View Post
LOL this feels just like high school! I dont know if you guys purposely make it feel that way, or its just the culture of the boards, but come on lets be honest..Im no English major, but Im pretty confident that if challenged, I could break down the post and identify more than one term that could be construed as "un-welcoming" Ok..maybe I could use a better adjective..but it seems like you guys are just jumping to his defense because he's a "good poster". Im sure he is..but the comments came across as a bit abrasive! And to whoever posted the terms of service..thank you..but..she did not post an open ended question. She really is the one that should be having this discussion with you but perhaps she was put off by the arragont tone used by Francois. And I wasnt picking a fight!
Again, if you read it as unwelcoming all I can tell you is that was not anyone's intention. If you want to continue to insist you saw something that wasn't there, that is your perrogative
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Old 09-21-2009, 11:11 PM
 
51 posts, read 73,217 times
Reputation: 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Again, if you read it as unwelcoming all I can tell you is that was not anyone's intention. If you want to continue to insist you saw something that wasn't there, that is your perrogative
Generally the thing to do when moving is to find and area with X, Y, and Z amenities that you like (preferably, in this day and age, a JOB lined up being numero uno), and move on behalf of the traits of the area, not simply

"I want to move to NC [or wherever] but I don't know anything about the area." If you don't know anything about the area, why do you want to move here?! (UNWELCOMING)



do you want urban/suburban/country, what expense range, what kind of terrain, what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider

What specific reasons are you looking to move,

do you want urban/suburban/country,

what expense range,
what kind of terrain,
what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider (ABRASIVE)

, and once you make a checklinst of all of those and compare places that match your wants, if some places in NC are on the list, then you would look more closely into those places (FACETIOUS)

But surely you aren't thinking "All of my problems will be solved if I go to NC" without any knowledge of specifics whatsoever?? (SNIDE)
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Old 09-21-2009, 11:28 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,712,871 times
Reputation: 40199
Quote:
Originally Posted by dealmaker74 View Post
Generally the thing to do when moving is to find and area with X, Y, and Z amenities that you like (preferably, in this day and age, a JOB lined up being numero uno), and move on behalf of the traits of the area, not simply

"I want to move to NC [or wherever] but I don't know anything about the area." If you don't know anything about the area, why do you want to move here?! (UNWELCOMING)



do you want urban/suburban/country, what expense range, what kind of terrain, what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider

What specific reasons are you looking to move,

do you want urban/suburban/country,

what expense range,
what kind of terrain,
what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider (ABRASIVE)

, and once you make a checklinst of all of those and compare places that match your wants, if some places in NC are on the list, then you would look more closely into those places (FACETIOUS)

But surely you aren't thinking "All of my problems will be solved if I go to NC" without any knowledge of specifics whatsoever?? (SNIDE)

You seem determined to find insult where I have tried to assure you none was intended...so, whatever.

What else can we tell you?
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Old 09-21-2009, 11:36 PM
 
51 posts, read 73,217 times
Reputation: 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
You seem determined to find insult where I have tried to assure you none was intended...so, whatever.

What else can we tell you?
Tell me you are not to arrogant to not have empathy for those that are not part of your clique. I dont know...maybe tell me that you may go out of your way to make new people feel welcome, so that even if they are not strong willed like myself, they will still feel free to engage you folks! Becuase yes you are all very knowledgeable im sure..but you know what guys..pitch and tone, does translate in cyberworld, even if you dont believe that it does.
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Old 09-21-2009, 11:42 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,712,871 times
Reputation: 40199
Quote:
Originally Posted by dealmaker74 View Post
Tell me you are not to arrogant to not have empathy for those that are not part of your clique. I dont know...maybe tell me that you may go out of your way to make new people feel welcome, so that even if they are not strong willed like myself, they will still feel free to engage you folks! Becuase yes you are all very knowledgeable im sure..but you know what guys..pitch and tone, does translate in cyberworld, even if you dont believe that it does.
sigh...you are new here so I am trying to cut you some slack, really. If you HAD been here awhile you would know that I have welcomed and helped literally hundreds of people find their place in NC, I am not part of any "clique".

Honestly, I think your problem is one that can happen whenever communication is written and not oral - it can be very difficult to discern "tone" of the written word. You think you "heard" something offensive, I have tried to tell you it was not written that way - let's call it a draw and let it go.
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Old 10-03-2009, 06:52 AM
 
4 posts, read 6,765 times
Reputation: 11
Thank you all for a feed back on all possibility of moving to nc. First i would like to move to releigh because i went for a quick visit and from what i saw it was clean ,quiet , nice neiborhood, people was friendly ect...plus i want better education for my kids i just want a nice house in a good place for the kids i understand about the jobs but i feel like my backgroung is fairly good i am a social worker i am also bilingual which is a plus anywhere so thats where i could start for those people who dont know there it si a little bit of a background. Thanks for all your help ......
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Old 10-03-2009, 07:07 AM
 
4 posts, read 6,765 times
Reputation: 11
Thank you dealmaker74 i really i appriciate you kindness. And for francouis i understand whare you coming from but sometimes in life you just need a change i dont travel a whole lot so when i went to nc i felt like i could see myself there and my family. As i said previously i have a good work backgroung and my husband is a truck driver for a company where we live currently and his job is willing to do transfer so that i think is good for strart.
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Old 10-06-2009, 07:13 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
10,728 posts, read 22,822,690 times
Reputation: 12325
Quote:
Originally Posted by YAMILA9874 View Post
Thank you all for a feed back on all possibility of moving to nc. First i would like to move to releigh because i went for a quick visit and from what i saw it was clean ,quiet , nice neiborhood, people was friendly ect...plus i want better education for my kids i just want a nice house in a good place for the kids i understand about the jobs but i feel like my backgroung is fairly good i am a social worker i am also bilingual which is a plus anywhere so thats where i could start for those people who dont know there it si a little bit of a background. Thanks for all your help ......
Bilingual in what? Spanish is very much in demand here, that's for sure.
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Old 10-06-2009, 07:17 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
10,728 posts, read 22,822,690 times
Reputation: 12325
Quote:
Originally Posted by dealmaker74 View Post

[QUOTING ME:]

"I want to move to NC [or wherever] but I don't know anything about the area." If you don't know anything about the area, why do you want to move here?! (UNWELCOMING)

do you want urban/suburban/country, what expense range, what kind of terrain, what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider

What specific reasons are you looking to move,

do you want urban/suburban/country,

what expense range,
what kind of terrain,
what kind of atmosphere, etc...

THOSE are the factors you need to consider (ABRASIVE)

, and once you make a checklinst of all of those and compare places that match your wants, if some places in NC are on the list, then you would look more closely into those places (FACETIOUS)

But surely you aren't thinking "All of my problems will be solved if I go to NC" without any knowledge of specifics whatsoever?? (SNIDE)
Dealmaker, not one of the emotions you attribute to my posting is accurate. NOT ONE. Why is it considered so horrific to ask someone to be specific in what they're looking for? It's like walking into Macy's at Christmastime and saying "I'm looking for a Christmas present." The FIRST thing they are going to ask is to be more specific--whom is it for? What do they like? How much are you willing to spend? How fancy are you looking for?

If you are so quick to take offense when none is intended, then you really don't need to be posting to message boards. This is not being "unwelcoming" or "abrasive" or "facetious" or "snide", but simply being honest.
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