Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Pennsylvania > Northeastern Pennsylvania
 [Register]
Northeastern Pennsylvania Scranton, Wilkes-Barre, Pocono area
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 06-17-2009, 09:16 AM
 
Location: Dallas, PA
1,418 posts, read 3,569,287 times
Reputation: 602

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by lialleycat View Post
The more people I meet, the smarter animals seem!
I have a refrigerator magnet that says "The more people I meet, the more I love my cat" hehe
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-17-2009, 09:53 AM
 
1,815 posts, read 5,382,364 times
Reputation: 789
Quote:
Originally Posted by EnyaGirl View Post
I have a refrigerator magnet that says "The more people I meet, the more I love my cat" hehe
Mine would have to read "the more people I meet the more I love my cats, parrot, finches and catfish." One day I hope to add miniature horses, mammoth donkeys, chickens and possibly a jersey cow.... Just call me farmer Mel...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-17-2009, 09:58 AM
 
Location: Dallas, PA
1,418 posts, read 3,569,287 times
Reputation: 602
Quote:
Originally Posted by lialleycat View Post
Mine would have to read "the more people I meet the more I love my cats, parrot, finches and catfish." One day I hope to add miniature horses, mammoth donkeys, chickens and possibly a jersey cow.... Just call me farmer Mel...
My husband wants to get pygmy goats..lol. We just built a huge fence in our backyard for the dog we're going to be getting (if mama dog ever gets pregnant), and now he says we're getting goats too.

Last edited by EnyaGirl; 06-17-2009 at 10:26 AM.. Reason: spelling
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-17-2009, 10:23 AM
 
1,815 posts, read 5,382,364 times
Reputation: 789
Quote:
Originally Posted by EnyaGirl View Post
My husband wants to get pigme goats..lol. We just built a huge fence in our backyard for the dog we're going to be getting (if mama dog ever gets pregnant), and now he says we're getting goats too.
If I got goats, which I've considered, this is the one I want Nigerian Dwarf (goat) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-17-2009, 03:42 PM
 
Location: Lawn Guyland New Yawk
371 posts, read 934,318 times
Reputation: 127
Quote:
Originally Posted by lialleycat View Post
Mine would have to read "the more people I meet the more I love my cats, parrot, finches and catfish." One day I hope to add miniature horses, mammoth donkeys, chickens and possibly a jersey cow.... Just call me farmer Mel...

OK...."Farmer Mel"
Don't forget the doggies!!!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2009, 10:11 AM
 
1,815 posts, read 5,382,364 times
Reputation: 789
Default Appologies to any lawyers out there...

These are from a book called Disorder in the AmericanCourts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, takendown and now published by court reporters that had the torment ofstaying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to youthat morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of theimpact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect yourmemory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example ofsomething youforgot?
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever beeninvolved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a persondies in hissleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old ishe?
WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ.
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you ****ting me?
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) wasAugust 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney.Can I get anew attorney?
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going withmale.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant toa depositionnotice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have youperformed on deadpeople?
WITNESS: All of them.. The live ones put up too much of afight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What schooldid you goto?
WITNESS: Oral.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined thebody?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
______________________________________
And the best for last:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did youcheck for apulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient wasalive when youbegan the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still beenalive,nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive andpracticing law.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2009, 12:25 PM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,430,820 times
Reputation: 1204
So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees...

I lasted less than a day......

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids,
yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7.

Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'

So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am, I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'

My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work....
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2009, 11:03 PM
 
Location: Western Hoosierland
17,997 posts, read 9,008,604 times
Reputation: 5943
Ha HA!! JG your so bad!!!..lol
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-19-2009, 05:40 AM
 
1,815 posts, read 5,382,364 times
Reputation: 789
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jungle George View Post
So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, a good find for many retirees...

I lasted less than a day......

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids,
yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7.

Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'

So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am, I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'

My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work....
Oh, I've wondered this myself many times....
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-19-2009, 10:47 AM
 
2,473 posts, read 5,430,820 times
Reputation: 1204
Default For All Y'all In NEPA....





YouTube - The Cuppy Cake Song With Lyrics
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Settings
X
Data:
Loading data...
Based on 2000-2020 data
Loading data...

123
Hide US histogram


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > Pennsylvania > Northeastern Pennsylvania
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top