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Old 02-02-2012, 04:41 PM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,719,093 times
Reputation: 3955

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I received a speeding ticket today. Going kind of fast--129 in a 35. (It was a school zone.) Does anyone know of a good lawyer who can help me get justice in this matter?

Also, they're throwing a distracted driving charge at me. I told the cop I'm great at multitasking and thus easily able to eat French onion soup and drive at the same time.

Oh, also, by the way, I'd had a couple of beers. OK--so they were actually shots of tequila. But that's like beer in Mexico. So yeah, ridiculous DUI charge too. I mean, the legal limit is what, .08? If you round it up, that's 1.0! And I blew 1.4, which rounded to the nearest integer is 1.0.

So I'm innocent!

I was going to put on my seatbelt when I finished my soup.

OK, thanks for any advice!
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Old 02-02-2012, 04:45 PM
 
3,852 posts, read 4,150,565 times
Reputation: 7867
You forgot to mention your untethered children in the back seat!

You should get a lawyer and take the driver improvement course. You'll get off fer sure! It'll help if you have a PhD.
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Old 02-02-2012, 04:53 PM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,719,093 times
Reputation: 3955
Quote:
Originally Posted by CapsChick View Post
You forgot to mention your untethered children in the back seat!
Oh, the kids? One was in the back, but the baby was in my arms. I was kind of steering with my elbows and using the one hand to eat the soup. (I had the phone on speaker. I'm not crazy!)
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Old 02-02-2012, 04:56 PM
 
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,718,665 times
Reputation: 41376
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carlingtonian View Post
I received a speeding ticket today. Going kind of fast--129 in a 35. (It was a school zone.) Does anyone know of a good lawyer who can help me get justice in this matter?

Also, they're throwing a distracted driving charge at me. I told the cop I'm great at multitasking and thus easily able to eat French onion soup and drive at the same time.

Oh, also, by the way, I'd had a couple of beers. OK--so they were actually shots of tequila. But that's like beer in Mexico. So yeah, ridiculous DUI charge too. I mean, the legal limit is what, .08? If you round it up, that's 1.0! And I blew 1.4, which rounded to the nearest integer is 1.0.

So I'm innocent!

I was going to put on my seatbelt when I finished my soup.

OK, thanks for any advice!
I recommend Johnny Cochran. The one guy I think who could get you off. Of course he may not seem to be listening at first.
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Old 02-02-2012, 04:58 PM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,719,093 times
Reputation: 3955
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395 View Post
I recommend Johnny Cochran. The one guy I think who could get you off. Of course he may not seem to be listening at first.
LOL! If he's not available, I'm gonna go for William Shatner. Mad cow!
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Old 02-02-2012, 05:05 PM
 
Location: Alexandria, VA
15,142 posts, read 27,760,706 times
Reputation: 27260
You also forgot to mention your expired license and the fact that you had 2 dozen prior tickets plus an outstanding warrant, you're from out of town, you didn't feel good (thus the soup).
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Old 02-02-2012, 05:12 PM
 
Location: New-Dentist Colony
5,759 posts, read 10,719,093 times
Reputation: 3955
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flamingo13 View Post
You also forgot to mention your expired license and the fact that you had 2 dozen prior tickets plus an outstanding warrant, you're from out of town, you didn't feel good (thus the soup).
Hey, how did you get hold of my file!?!
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Old 02-02-2012, 05:14 PM
 
Location: Suburbia
8,826 posts, read 15,311,022 times
Reputation: 4533
What? No radar detector?
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Old 02-02-2012, 05:15 PM
 
Location: Suburbia
8,826 posts, read 15,311,022 times
Reputation: 4533
How many stopped school buses did you pass?
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Old 02-02-2012, 05:19 PM
 
1,256 posts, read 4,194,278 times
Reputation: 791
Quote:
Originally Posted by Carlingtonian View Post
I was kind of steering with my elbows and using the one hand to eat the soup
I once knew someone who got a ticket for eating fried chicken - I suspect she was, indeed, steering with her elbows.
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