Moving from Nova to Charleston Sc (Lexington, Columbia: transplants, 2014, how much)

[Teebyrd86]

Hey guys! I have taken a break from this site after so much drama here in the past. But I am back. I am just wondering if anyone here has ever lived in Charleston? I am thinking of taking a position with my company in Charleston in early 2014 and honestly I think for me it will be a poisitive move. Nova is great for what it is but I think I am ready for a slower pace and southern town. But to be honest I am worried Nova has spoiled me. If you have lived in Charleston and now Nova what is the pros and cons to moving there? I already now I will see less traffic there, nicer people and a lower cost of living but what about the gay scene? I am gay but not flamboyant or do I go around screaming it out loud. Is being a single gay male in Charleston a bad idea? Yes I know some would say I should post this in the charleston thread but I wanted to get feedback from those who have lived there and now here.... thanks in advanced!

[Carlingtonian]

I have a cousin who is from there and got married there. We went to his wedding. It struck me as a beautiful city but noticeably segregated. As an interracial couple, we were also followed by a car once, while walking around in the evening and admiring the beautiful old mansions that overlook the ocean.

I personally couldn't stand all the revisionist Southern apologism in South Carolina and other Deep South states. Not that everyone there is that way, but this sentiment and culture do seem to be prominent in SC--e.g., the confederate flag used to fly over the state house till 2000. And I need not mention that nasty old bag who fries things on TV and calls people racist names.

No idea if gay people are accepted there; I'd kind of be surprised if it's a beacon of tolerance, but maybe it's the one place in the state where all the liberals go, like SLC is in Utah, reportedly. And Stephen Colbert is from there.

[luv2write79]

My husband and I grew in the MD/VA metro area, and we moved to South Carolina in 2007. At the time, we lived in Conway, which is outside of Myrtle Beach. It was a little too dull for us, so we moved to Hanahan, about 10 minutes from Charleston. We liked it there, but not enough to stay. We moved back to NoVA this summer.

The general atmosphere down there is slower, which it seems you wouldn't mind, but slower also means there is less to do. The traffic is peanuts compared to here. The beach is wonderful, and the "coastal vibe" is alive and well there.

That being said, it's still a very much backwards way of thinking for many of the residents there. It's as southern as can be, and religion is a very large part of life down there. It even infiltrated into my daughter's elementary school. I had a gay friend there who found some good nightlife downtown, but he had a very difficult time meeting people outside of that (or even within it, for that matter). There just isn't a large group of tolerant people there, although I have to say that Charleston is probably the most progressive city in SC based on my experience.

The museums all cost a lot of money, and the people seem to have "southern hospitality," but there's a running joke about the south: to your face, they'll smile and be friendly, but behind your back, they're saying, "bless her little heart." The good-ol' boy system is a big problem down there, and lots of locals frown on transplants invading their towns. If you already have a job lined up, though, you're not in danger of being overlooked for employment.

I didn't ever feel like an outcast or looked down upon, though. It's just a matter of how much you can ignore. We mainly moved back so our children could grow up in a more diverse, tolerant area and would have access to more educational opportunities. I chose the best school I could find down there, and I still felt like it wasn't nearly as good in VA. Also, every time I met someone, they asked which church I went to as if that defined me.

I hope you have some other input about this. It's really a personal choice. The lifestyle is nice, but you have to take the "southern mindset" with a grain of salt in order to enjoy it. The beaches rock, and housing is cheap, though!

[Fredesch]

I never lived in Charleston, but have spent several days there in the summer. What I remember was temperatures constantly over 90 degrees and 90 percent humidity. Going outside was unbearable. Haven't been back since.

[FindingZen]

I've read anecdotes that Charleston is actually one of the more gay-friendly cities in South Carolina. Whether that's all relative is something I can't answer.

Needless to say, researching and initiating threads on the Charleston forum itself could help. Odds are that there are transplants to the area that can offer some perspective.

[smithy77]

Spent a vacation in Charleston a few years ago. The historic architecture and food scene floored me, although I had a strange encounter within a few minutes of arriving at my hotel. I shared an elevator with a 50-ish couple on the way up to my room.

Guy: So, where are you from?

Me: Virginia.

Guy: What part of Virginia?

Me: Just outside of D.C.

Guy: Oh, your girlfriend Nancy Pelosi is in town.

I swear to God, these were the only words I exchanged with this guy. I was so slack jawed, I didn't know what to say. Nice welcome, huh?

As a gay person myself, it would be one of the last places I would consider living (and I've lived in Oklahoma!).

[Noire]

Originally Posted by luv2write79

My husband and I grew in the MD/VA metro area, and we moved to South Carolina in 2007. At the time, we lived in Conway, which is outside of Myrtle Beach. It was a little too dull for us, so we moved to Hanahan, about 10 minutes from Charleston. We liked it there, but not enough to stay. We moved back to NoVA this summer.

The general atmosphere down there is slower, which it seems you wouldn't mind, but slower also means there is less to do. The traffic is peanuts compared to here. The beach is wonderful, and the "coastal vibe" is alive and well there.

That being said, it's still a very much backwards way of thinking for many of the residents there. It's as southern as can be, and religion is a very large part of life down there. It even infiltrated into my daughter's elementary school. I had a gay friend there who found some good nightlife downtown, but he had a very difficult time meeting people outside of that (or even within it, for that matter). There just isn't a large group of tolerant people there, although I have to say that Charleston is probably the most progressive city in SC based on my experience.

The museums all cost a lot of money, and the people seem to have "southern hospitality," but there's a running joke about the south: to your face, they'll smile and be friendly, but behind your back, they're saying, "bless her little heart." The good-ol' boy system is a big problem down there, and lots of locals frown on transplants invading their towns. If you already have a job lined up, though, you're not in danger of being overlooked for employment.

I didn't ever feel like an outcast or looked down upon, though. It's just a matter of how much you can ignore. We mainly moved back so our children could grow up in a more diverse, tolerant area and would have access to more educational opportunities. I chose the best school I could find down there, and I still felt like it wasn't nearly as good in VA. Also, every time I met someone, they asked which church I went to as if that defined me.

I hope you have some other input about this. It's really a personal choice. The lifestyle is nice, but you have to take the "southern mindset" with a grain of salt in order to enjoy it. The beaches rock, and housing is cheap, though!

This basically sums it up. I just moved from SC. I spent a lot of time in Charleston, my family roots are there. I did feel like an outcast, especially not being Christian. People are nicer but in general Southern Hospitality is a myth. I like being back up north. I missed diversity, being able to find diverse products and open- mindedness. The plusses for me were the weather and a great cost of living. Oh yeah- THE BEACHES!!!

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by Teebyrd86

Hey guys! I have taken a break from this site after so much drama here in the past. But I am back. I am just wondering if anyone here has ever lived in Charleston? I am thinking of taking a position with my company in Charleston in early 2014 and honestly I think for me it will be a poisitive move. Nova is great for what it is but I think I am ready for a slower pace and southern town. But to be honest I am worried Nova has spoiled me. If you have lived in Charleston and now Nova what is the pros and cons to moving there? I already now I will see less traffic there, nicer people and a lower cost of living but what about the gay scene? I am gay but not flamboyant or do I go around screaming it out loud. Is being a single gay male in Charleston a bad idea? Yes I know some would say I should post this in the charleston thread but I wanted to get feedback from those who have lived there and now here.... thanks in advanced!

I know you and me are not friends and have had issues but trust me, Charleston is NOT a good place for you. I say that as someone who was born in South Carolina.

I personally couldn't stand all the revisionist Southern apologism in South Carolina and other Deep South states. Not that everyone there is that way, but this sentiment and culture do seem to be prominent in SC--e.g., the confederate flag used to fly over the state house till 2000. And I need not mention that nasty old bag who fries things on TV and calls people racist names.

It is not even deep South states. I found plenty of that garbage in most of Kentucky that is not Louisville, Ft. Knox/Hardin County, Lexington, or the Cincinnati suburbs in Northern KY.

I believe you are referring to Paula Deen.

[Carlingtonian]

Originally Posted by smithy77

As a gay person myself, it would be one of the last places I would consider living (and I've lived in Oklahoma!).

Oklahoma = super gay. For god's sake, they made a musical about it.

Originally Posted by The Dissenter

It is not even deep South states. I found plenty of that garbage in most of Kentucky that is not Louisville, Ft. Knox/Hardin County, Lexington, or the Cincinnati suburbs in Northern KY.

It can be found many places--I've seen, to my utter bafflement, confederate flags on pickups in Vermont--but I don't think it's ubiquitous in other places, as it is in the Deep South. In Texas, for instance, you are far more likely to see Texas flags everywhere. The confederate flag pops up from time to time (and was once more prevalently displayed), but it's now seen rightly as a divisive embarassment.

I wonder if Columbia, SC, might be more worldly and diverse than Charleston, since the university is there.

[Noire]

Originally Posted by Carlingtonian

Oklahoma = super gay. For god's sake, they made a musical about it.



It can be found many places--I've seen, to my utter bafflement, confederate flags on pickups in Vermont--but I don't think it's ubiquitous in other places, as it is in the Deep South. In Texas, for instance, you are far more likely to see Texas flags everywhere. The confederate flag pops up from time to time (and was once more prevalently displayed), but it's now seen rightly as a divisive embarassment.

I wonder if Columbia, SC, might be more worldly and diverse than Charleston, since the university is there.

Nope. Just moved from Columbia. Very much the same. Lots of institutionalized racism, homophobia, religious intolerance.