[Goodpasture]

Rules of Colorado, Wyoming, Montana, Utah, Idaho, Texas, Oklahoma and the rest of the Wild West are as follows:

1. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Turn your cap right, your head ain't crooked.

3. Let's get this straight: it's called a 'gravel road.' I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're gonna get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

4. They are cattle. That's why they smell like cattle. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-20, I-30, I-40, I-80 & I-90 go east and west, I-35, I-25 & I-15 goes north and south. Pick one and go.

5. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 Combines that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

6. Every person in the Wild West waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.

7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese/pheasants/ducks/doves are comin' in during the hunts, we WILL shoot it outta' your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

8. Yeah. We eat trout, salmon, deer and elk. You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

9. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday in November.

10. We open doors for women. That's applied to all women, regardless of age.

11. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu. Order steak, or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.

12. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup! Oh, yeah . . . . We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat . . . . IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!!

13. You bring 'Coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet and served over ice. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

14. College and High School Football is as important here as the Giants, the Yankees, the Mets, the Lakers and the Knicks, and a dang site more fun to watch.

15. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the fish.

16. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity-thump crap ain't music, anyway. We don't want to hear it anymore than we want to see your boxers! Refer back to #1!

[debey]

7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese/pheasants/ducks/doves are comin' in during the hunts, we WILL shoot it outta' your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

This is so true......

[flintysooner]

Outstanding rules.

Seems like there should have been something about a tractor and/or a a Gator though.

[Bass&Catfish2008]

Amen to all of 'em my Okie Brother.

#8 and #10 are especially true.

[EarthBound?]

Now my only question is, "Does fly-fishing count" as an Okie thing, or does that only apply to Montana??

[Goodpasture]

Trout Fishing in Oklahoma
The 5 primary trouts are the rainbow, brook, brown, cutthroat and lake trout. Brown trout are considered the most difficult to catch and brookies are the easiest. Pure cold water is key to survival of the trouts and the brook trout is the most sensitive to temperature. The others are comfortable in slightly warmer waters.

Oklahoma Trout Fishing - Rainbow & Brown Trout Fishing - Fly Fishing

Any Questions?

[EarthBound?]

Originally Posted by Goodpasture

Oklahoma Trout Fishing - Rainbow & Brown Trout Fishing - Fly Fishing

Any Questions?

Oh goodie, I knew there was something special about Okla

[tookey]

These are great rules hope they get followed by travelors at least some of the time

[Manuer12]

well happy cows come from all over! PEOPLE WHO COME FROM THE CITY AND WANT TO LIVE WITH COWS AND WORRY ABOUT THE SMELL ARE NOT HAPPY COWS ARE THEY!

[Ecovlke]

Ahhh, love it. This Okie lib lives by a good many of those doctrine; cuz they're Okie doctrine.

If you see a brown skinned woman with long, curly brown hair, wearing hip boots or waders in 100 degree heat climbing up and down some muddy stream banks and crawling into her 4 X 4 work truck.......wave. It's me.

Ain't no politics on a dirt road; just people. Ecovlke

Gawd, I love the West!