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Old 07-16-2007, 02:54 AM
Location: Michigan
29,214 posts, read 52,414,111 times
Reputation: 21670


We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us
that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than two." We haven't used Sears repair since.

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER
CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be
crossing anymore." From Kingman, KS

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the
person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry,
but they only had iceburg lettuce. He was a Chef? Yep... From Kansas

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask." Happened in Birmingham, Ala.

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I
was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She
asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals
blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on
earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in
Wichita , KS

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker; she was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would
not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our
car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service
department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the
driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
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Old 07-16-2007, 04:31 AM
Location: Happy in Utah
1,224 posts, read 3,229,438 times
Reputation: 930
Okay here is one from new mexico, I took my husband to the emergancy room because his chest and upper back was hurting( nothing serious thank god) HE hadome exrays etc, the Doctor then told us it was his siatic nerve wich to me seemed odd because I thought that nerve had more to do with the lower back and legs, anyways we then watched as the same doctor went around(this was an open and very small emergancy room) and told 4out of 5 patients they had a siatic nerve. One was throwing up, one had a headache for days,one was complaing of stomach pains and the fourth was my husband. A nurse then came by and said here is the medication of the day and gave my husband a shot, we asked her if she was joking and she said no. Oh and the 5th person was sleeping, so the doctor did not talk to him at alll. The same hospital told my friends Grandmother she had stomach cancer and was going to die, she went and got a 2nd opion she had a bleeding ulcer. Thank God this place was looked into and has been cleaned up since.
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