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You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house--mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room, or whatever. You are hot and sweaty, covered in dirt or paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit--shorts with the hole in crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who knows what, and an old pair of tennis shoes. Right in the middle of this great home improvement project, you realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help complete the job.
Depending on your age you might do the following:
In your 20's:
Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout lane. You went to school with the pretty girl running the register.
In your 30's:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl running the register is the kid sister to someone you went to school with.
In your 40's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you don't want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The spicy young thing running the register is your daughter's age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy.
In your 50's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don't want to get dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The cutie running the register smiles when she sees you coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the hat you have on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got Worms.'
In your 60's:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the dog poop off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing is exposed by the hole in your shorts. The girl running the register may be cute, but you don't have your glasses on so you are not sure.
In your 70's:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they have your prescriptions ready. Don't even notice the dog poop on your shoes. The young thing at the register smiles at you because you remind her of her grandfather.
In your 80's:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now you remember you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and wander around aimlessly trying to think what the heck it was you were looking for.You went to school with the old lady who greeted you at the front door and you still think she's a hot chick. Try to find your car in the parking lot.
I can attest to starting and stopping and finally remembering I wanted to go to Wal-Mart then forgetting if I made that list or not and spending the next hour looking. Next thing you know, I've talked myself out of going today because it is getting late and postone the trip till tomorrow.
Tomorrow arrives, I get involved in the daily grind of chores, come across something that reminds me I was working on a project outside yesterday that probably didn't get finished, go out to work on it, look for an hour or so for all tools I need, figure out I need something from Wal-Mart, come inside to make a list, find list from yesterday and grimice at how forgetful I am as I head out the door and get in the car. Drive to Wal-Mart, get out with list in hand and grab a buggy.
Look at list :
paint
paint brush and roller
ladder
an 8 foot tree
oops, should have read list before leaving home, I am in the car and can't get this until I get the truck.
Oh well, while I am here I need to pick up some milk and toliet paper
$200 later I load groceries in car and head home to fix dinner. I've blown my project budget so the mess I've created out in the back yard will simply have to wait till next month when I get paid again.
Now, if I could just keep up with the list for that long, and remember exactly where I wanted to put that tree and what color I wanted to paint that shed!
I can attest to starting and stopping and finally remembering I wanted to go to Wal-Mart then forgetting if I made that list or not and spending the next hour looking. Next thing you know, I've talked myself out of going today because it is getting late and postone the trip till tomorrow.
Tomorrow arrives, I get involved in the daily grind of chores, come across something that reminds me I was working on a project outside yesterday that probably didn't get finished, go out to work on it, look for an hour or so for all tools I need, figure out I need something from Wal-Mart, come inside to make a list, find list from yesterday and grimice at how forgetful I am as I head out the door and get in the car. Drive to Wal-Mart, get out with list in hand and grab a buggy.
Look at list :
paint
paint brush and roller
ladder
an 8 foot tree
oops, should have read list before leaving home, I am in the car and can't get this until I get the truck.
Oh well, while I am here I need to pick up some milk and toliet paper
$200 later I load groceries in car and head home to fix dinner. I've blown my project budget so the mess I've created out in the back yard will simply have to wait till next month when I get paid again.
Now, if I could just keep up with the list for that long, and remember exactly where I wanted to put that tree and what color I wanted to paint that shed!
Trade your car in on a convertible or a hatchback. You can put anything in those. I bought a 2 car garage door and brought it home in a Mitsubishi Eclipse. My 46" wide screen TV and 4 burner gas grill came home in my Cavalier Convertible.
Trade your car in on a convertible or a hatchback. You can put anything in those. I bought a 2 car garage door and brought it home in a Mitsubishi Eclipse. My 46" wide screen TV and 4 burner gas grill came home in my Cavalier Convertible.
Oh yeah my DH and I have been known to haul many things in a hatchback. We went to Lowe's one time to buy laminate flooring, we loaded up the cart, went outside and "we had the hatchback". We looked like Sanford and Son driving home, lol.
I actually went into HD last week in my flannel jammie bottoms, dirty (from gardening in them) UGG slippers, and a dirty, sweaty tee with the neck cut off and splattered with white paint. lol My hair was growdy (sp) and I put it up in a ponytail so people 'wouldn't notice'. HAHAHAHAHA I scooted in and scooted out. If I'd seen someone I knew in there, I'd have died on the spot, I swear!!!!! I prayed to God I didn't get pulled over on the highway for speeding or anything else!!!!
(Well, I am in the over 50 crowd!!! LMAO)
Last edited by CoastalMaine; 05-30-2009 at 07:14 PM..
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"we had the hatchback". We looked like Sanford and Son driving home, lol.
