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Old 07-31-2009, 02:38 PM
 
Location: Bon Temps
1,743 posts, read 4,307,250 times
Reputation: 1837

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I wold go to the funeral home for visitation...I see "wakes" on television, but I have never actually seen one. It might be a regional thing. Everywhere I've ever lived there is visitation at the funeral home and a funeral.
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Old 07-31-2009, 09:00 PM
 
28,736 posts, read 43,600,140 times
Reputation: 37716
Quote:
Originally Posted by Antlered Chamataka View Post
Are these things you should really ask others for an opinion?

I thought there are some spectra of life which are above opinion.
What an arrogant response. Why is it that you think everyone alive automatically knows the right thing to do in circumstances like this? Gosh you must know everything!
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Old 07-31-2009, 09:26 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, Texas
1,691 posts, read 3,624,996 times
Reputation: 4116
back to previous OP Question:

it is a personal choice, but as one who has seen many of my friends parents, church friends, and others (including a neighbor) I can understand you dilema. I don't do funerals ( as a personal choice) I will stop by the viewing or reception after a funeral.
Some funeral homes offer online signing of the registry ( odd I know ) for the funeral/viewing. That is always an option if you are not into the whole funeral service thing. The one neighbor who died we were invited to the funeral ( she was Buddhist ) I had to miss it, that was one service I would love to witness just once that and a buddhist wedding).
You can always tell the family you will help keep and eye on the house till things are settled. Crooks love to hit houses where a funeral is involved ( they know when the family is away).

Mom ad I helped with the neighbors (husband) who still lives there. After everyone one of her family and his left we made sure he had food. WE taught him the fine art of box ready to make meals. He didn't know how to cook. So we helped in that as well.

Just be a good neighbor if some of the family stays and offer help esp after all the other help has gone.
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Old 08-01-2009, 08:25 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, Texas
1,691 posts, read 3,624,996 times
Reputation: 4116
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode View Post
The OP got more arrogant, argumentative responses than you can shake
a stick at, I happen to be one of them. My post was just an FYI.

Sorry about the interuption here Kerowyn, carry on......
no worries on that... I recall WT post I think we had a few rounds as well...

Didn't know he left us... oh well... ya never know if some lurks behind the clouds and never posts.... I did that for awhile when I got really stressed out. Just lurked... read maybe did a few annon rep points...

I just get bored and love to hear myself write who knows maybe someone can use my incite... forgot to look at the dates on the origin of post.
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Old 08-01-2009, 01:31 PM
 
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
6,481 posts, read 6,660,841 times
Reputation: 29779
I think you should do whatever it is your comfortable with.
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Old 08-01-2009, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Orlando, Florida
43,856 posts, read 47,273,451 times
Reputation: 58682
This is just how I personally respond to any death in neighbor/coworker relationships.....

They have all these friends and family members coming in. Based on that, I show up not only with a meal for X amount of immediate family members, but with the "I'm here to help clean and help you get ready for guests" attitude. Deaths catch a family unaware and they need to be able to mourn without worrying about the other stuff.

I never care about being a guest.... I always come to help serve food and clean up afterwards.

If I were a man, I think offering to mow or do any needed yard work is more helpful than another bowl of macaroni and cheese.
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Old 08-01-2009, 03:35 PM
 
1,121 posts, read 3,428,552 times
Reputation: 1142
I definately think you should show some neighborly help and kindness to the family if you are able to speak to them personally and send flowers and a nice card to the wake, however, you shouldn't attend anything you haven't been invited to.
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