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My wife's sister is always making announcements at family events that we are not being friendly and never invite her over to our home. I want to tell her why there is no invitation but always just change the subject instead.
My wife and I could list and describe in depth whey we do not invite her sister to our home but we always hide behind such lame excuses as were to busy, or just ignoring the question.
If you have relatives, neighbors, or work mates who you really do not like, but they push for a social invite, what do you do? Why not just tell them why you do not want to be social?
You should tell her what is bothering you in a tactful manner. She may not be aware of how bothersome or annoying she is and perhaps if you told her, she may want to take steps to work on whatever it is that bugs people.
I don't think you should say anything. It's your wife's sister...if something needs to be said, your wife needs to be the one to say it.
I probably would say nothing, unless the reason were something really serious, like the relative had a serious drug problem, was a known pedophile, something that really needed to be addressed.
Would you mind telling us why you don't want to spend time with her?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingler
My wife's sister is always making announcements at family events that we are not being friendly and never invite her over to our home. I want to tell her why there is no invitation but always just change the subject instead.
My wife and I could list and describe in depth whey we do not invite her sister to our home but we always hide behind such lame excuses as were to busy, or just ignoring the question.
If you have relatives, neighbors, or work mates who you really do not like, but they push for a social invite, what do you do? Why not just tell them why you do not want to be social?
Would you mind telling us why you don't want to spend time with her?
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She is not interested in anything we have to say. We try to bring up various topics of conversation but they are ignored. I like a 50/50 conversation. She ends up doing 90% of the talking.
In that case, I think I would tell her when the rest of the family isn't around. And you could consciously try redirecting her conversations.
Now I say that, but I have a relative who is always negative. No matter what is said, she has something negative to say about it. So I see her in small doses or in a larger group. I've even intentionally tried to think of things to say that could have no negative response and she STILL says something negative in reply. So, I'm not saying that it is easy!
But, since she wonders why she never gets invited over, if you tell her what you've told us, she may make more of an effort to take an interest in your family. Or maybe send an e-mail. Draft it first and sleep on it, edit it and then send it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dingler
Would you mind telling us why you don't want to spend time with her?
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She is not interested in anything we have to say. We try to bring up various topics of conversation but they are ignored. I like a 50/50 conversation. She ends up doing 90% of the talking.
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