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Old 06-11-2010, 09:25 AM
Location: Wisconsin
677 posts, read 1,554,147 times
Reputation: 633


I was at my brother's graduation last night and saw that a lot of people brought babies to the ceremony. No big deal, it's largely a family celebration anyway.

When someone in my brother's class was performing a song, this baby just started crying hysterically. We were in a gym, so the noise echoed. Then another kid was yelling random words (maybe they weren't even words? lol he was very little). Again, no big deal, kids get upset and make noise...whatever.

But what surprised me was that the parents made absolutely no effort to remove the kids from the situation. Now I'm no baby expert, but I would think that if a kid is crying, s/he needs something or is scared. Wouldn't it just make more sense to remove them from the situation? I would think that it would be better for their needs and be less annoying and disrespectful to everyone else.

I also noticed this at my cousin's wedding a few months ago. During the ceremony, there were a couple of babies crying...and nothing from the parents! Is this one of those "kids will be kids" moments that people just ignore or something? I just think it's rude.

So what's your take on bringing small children to public/special events? Do you even bother doing it? Do you take them outside if they're acting up?
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Old 06-11-2010, 09:34 AM
Location: SF Bay Area
1,582 posts, read 2,824,498 times
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I didn't bring my kids to special events until they were old enough to behave. I didn't feel it was fair to the other people attending or to my kids. I understand that some parents can't get a babysitter, and if the baby must attend I would hope the parent would go outside with the baby if they would start to cause a disturbance.
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Old 06-11-2010, 09:47 AM
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mchelle I am with you - family events like that - sure bring the baby, but sit in the back and excuse yourself when the child starts getting noisy. Seems logical to me.
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:01 AM
10,629 posts, read 25,447,316 times
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I wouldn't personally bring a baby to a graduation because I think they'd be unhappy (they're usually pretty boring and long) and then I'd risk missing the event, but I don't think there's anything wrong with it, either. And weddings: definitely babies should be invited and should attend, since those are the ultimate family events. But yes, I definitely agree that parents who do nothing and just sit there while their babies cry are being inconsiderate of others. I do have a kid, but don't consider that to be a "kids being kids" moment -- I consider it to be a rude parent moment.
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:22 AM
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We think long and hard about events before we decide to attend. If it is something we need to go to we usually err on the side of getting a sitter for the event to allow us (and everyone around us) to enjoy it better.

The times when we have gone to major events with the kids it's under the condition that one of us may end up taking them out of the event if they have trouble behaving. Whoever has a more vested interest in the reason we are there gets to enjoy it and the other one juggles the kids.
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:24 AM
Location: Texas
8,672 posts, read 21,517,185 times
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hmmm... My son was a very easy baby and seldom cried. So we took him a good many places with no problem. That said, however, I don't think I would have taken him to someone's wedding/funeral or any similar "once in a lifetime" type events. Maybe if I was absolutely certain I could have sat by an exit and whisked him out immediately if necessary. IMO, some events are just too significant to have them ruined by crying/fussiness of a baby or young child.
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Old 06-11-2010, 10:58 AM
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I always try to scout out the best exit strategy..LOL whether it is sitting at the bottom of the bleachers or at the table by the door. But sometimes its not always possible were the parents in a difficult position to take the kids out (they were in the middle of the bleachers and would have to say excuse to to 100 diffrent people)
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Old 06-11-2010, 11:11 AM
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I think it's rude to NOT walk out.
If my children start whining, I leave until I can calm them down.
Why ruin the ceremony for everyone because you don't have a sitter?
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Old 06-11-2010, 02:37 PM
Location: Hillsborough
2,825 posts, read 6,620,683 times
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In general, if I can't bring my baby, I don't go. Most weddings I've been invited to, they have begged me to bring the baby because everyone wants to see her. If my baby is invited, I have no problem with bringing her. Typically, I can nurse her during quiet times and that keeps her occupied. My kids have been to several weddings even from one week old and I've never had a problem with them crying. I was, however, sitting in an easy exit location just in case, and would have left if there had been trouble. I would never just let the child sit there and cry, but I wouldn't do that in the privacy of my own home either - I would comfort the child. There was one wedding that I was invited to that specified no kids. We didn't go. I've also taken a baby to a graduation and a funeral. Again, not a problem.
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Old 06-11-2010, 03:32 PM
Location: Bowman, ND
2 posts, read 2,315 times
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You know, we were in a very similar position just last month. It was my daughter's 8th grade graduation. Not a big a deal as 12th, but she was excited. Well, I also have a 4 year old and a 1 year old. Naturally they were bored out of their minds.

So as usual, I found a place near the exit that I could watch the ceremony from. I had brought many toys, snacks and things to keep the little ones occupied. And as usual, it didn't work. So I came up with a brilliant new strategy. I took the kids out of the gym. Simple as that.

The only problem with that, was that I was going to miss seeing my daughter get her awards and certificate. Luckily for me, there was another mother going through the same thing as I and we hit upon another great idea. We took our rambunctious kids to another area and took turns watching them so we each didn't miss our kids special moments and everything went off great.

It feels like to me, the parent that lets their child cry, whine, make noise, run around without supervision, is one who has taken selfishness to new heights. Yes, I have these moments where I don't want to be distracted by the kids, but I would never take that moment until I knew that they were also taken care of.

I guess in the long run, concerned parents find a solution. It may not be perfect, but at least something gets done.
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