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Please if anyone has advice I would most appreciate it.
I am from Michigan and my divorce was final on May 4th 2009. I have joint custody but my girl’s dad is the custodial parent, only because my jobs are away from home so I never fought for custody. If I new then what I know now then I would of never done that I thought no matter what the girls would always come first, but no his hatred towards me has clouded his mind he drinks takes anti depressants and has even told me vicidin to just get through the day. My girls want out of his house they say he has called them retarded told my 10 year old she was an anchor and my 16 year old said he has even said they are a burden and constantly calls her a stupid teenage ***** .And is constantly telling the girls that I am a compulsive liar. It breaks my heart. I have contacted friend of court, a lawyer and they all say unless some one backs up my girls claims like a teacher or counselor then I may not have a leg to stand on. I was on a 7 month job out of town and had to take him to court just so my parents could take my girls to the airport to be with me he is a scum. I have left my girls in a lions den he has made threats to my 16 year old that if I ever get custody of them then they would have to suffer the consciences of his actions. I pay his house payment for child support its $1108.00 a month I also pay the girls phone service there school lunches buy there school clothes, my older daughters horse board and car insurence when they ask him for anything he says ask your mom. My 16 year old begs me every day to get her out of there she will be 17 in October but it don’t matter the Michigan law is 18. Does anyone no anyone I can talk to help get them girls out any suggestions I need advice. I am a great mom I Love them girls with all my heart and they are so great but he is mentally messing them up. Just so no one thinks I’m a compulsive liar I left him cause of many years of him accusing me for nothing and he burned and destroyed a bunch of my stuff so I filed for divorce. Now I feel terrible to have left them girls behind and can't get them out.
Tell them to talk to the school counselor for right now I would call cps and report what you know . Do you know any of the neighbors who dislike him ? are you friendly with any of them ? Have the girls tell them what is going on surely after hearing this stuff , what parent or adult could sit by and let this go on ? If I heard something said to a teenager like that I would be calling so fast and by him not providing for them and leaving it all on you I would think he is not living up to his end as a father . I hope you get all of this straightened out . Does he abuse drugs ? does he constantly take prescription drugs ? These are things that a cps worker and a judge for the family court would find rather interesting .
I appreciate your response and I will definatly contact CPS. My older daughter did talk to the school counsler and so did I but he played it off as her just being a teen and told her that he had a very strict father and told her that he was glad now that his father was that way it seems people turn a deaf ear on kids. I have talked to friend of court and they look at me like I have two heads. It is very frustrating. Yes I know for a fact there dad drinks heavily and as far as drug abuse I do believe he does. He swears all the time and does not even care that they are in ear shot. I am also scared of what he may do if I were to get custody of the girls. But thanks again. I will do what I can..
I think I know why this thread isn't getting a lot of responses. I mean, really? He was a compulsive liar and burnt your stuff and you didn't even fight for custody? I'm not going to say anymore.
My job sends me all over. My lawyer said I would not get custody doing that job. As you know jobs are few and far between. My bills are over $3000.00 a month . I got to work so I can provide for my kids because obviosly he wont. I really think if I was able to have taken the kids from the start he would of snapped and I think someday he still will. My lawyer even said he dont know how I stayed as long as I did when he met him. Yes I messed up and thank you for pointing it out, but seriously I never thought in a million years he would turn on the kids.
My job sends me all over. My lawyer said I would not get custody doing that job. As you know jobs are few and far between. My bills are over $3000.00 a month . I got to work so I can provide for my kids because obviosly he wont. I really think if I was able to have taken the kids from the start he would of snapped and I think someday he still will. My lawyer even said he dont know how I stayed as long as I did when he met him. Yes I messed up and thank you for pointing it out, but seriously I never thought in a million years he would turn on the kids.
Abusers are abusers and most men who are abusive to their wives become abusive to their children eventually. Most women who are abusive to husbands do the same.
because my jobs are away from home so I never fought for custody.
I got as far as this line right here and checked out......
Kinda makes me wonder what in your life is worth fighting for...
Quote:
Originally Posted by tagmac1016
Just so no one thinks I’m a compulsive liar I left him cause of many years of him accusing me for nothing and he burned and destroyed a bunch of my stuff so I filed for divorce.
So he burned your crap, you knew this and still did not fight for custody....and now you have remorse?
OK I understand the critisism from everyone on the outside looking in but you dont have a clue... I just was hoping somebody would know of a lawyer, counsler or someone who I could talk to too get them out I have been fighting this for over a year with tons of regrets and no help, but through the divorce I got screwed over with all the bills he got everything else . I didn't force the sale of the home because I didn't want to mess them up any more , I pay my daughters horse board, phone bill,car insurence, school clothes and have even taken them over food while he was at work. I JUST WANTED OUT and I cant afford not to work. jobs locally are few and far between to pay my bills. I blew off his fit of rage on me as a fit of rage because I was divorcing him.,but as I said I didn't think he would ever treat the girls bad.
CPS will just make things worse. Those people are the farthest thing from a friend you want. Thieves.Liars the whole lot of them.
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