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Here we go again.....please let me say that IN GENERAL I agree that most obesity (regardless of age) has to do with over eating and under exercising. But I do get irritated when I hear people say "there is no excuse for..." You don't know - unless you know the people in question YOU DO NOT KNOW. I have been neighbors/good friends for years with a family who had a daughter that is obese by any definition. Her parents have done so much - the poor girl was a "solid" baby - breastfed so no problems there, she started into "chubby" at about 4-3...Extremely active family. Extremely. No junk food in the house. This girl played tennis, golfed, rode bikes, swam competitively for years and years....and just kept getting larger. Her mom spoke with the pediatrician who said she was fine that most likely she'd outgrow it. She didn't. They ran the basic tests - nothing. They had her to a pediatric nutritionist - they documented everything the child put in her mouth - the mom even spoke with parents of friends and to the teachers at school to make sure she wasn't trading lunches or whatever. Nope - in fact the nutritionist even commented that she ate better and less than most kids. Fast forward 10 years. Girl is extremely large. Pediatrician warned parents about making a big deal about her weight because it might cause other problems - "she has to want it for herself"..Parents have offered personal trainer.....She is not so active anymore. It's hard and it never got her anywhere anyway. Honestly it breaks my heart. I know it does her parents also. I realize this isn't the norm but it DOES happen - not all parents with overweight kids are "bad parents" or not doing their job.<end rant>
Last edited by maciesmom; 07-30-2010 at 04:53 PM..
I try not to judge but if you are nosy like I am when at the supermarket and see all these fat folks and their kids with carts loaded up with chips, pizza's, soda's, sugar cereal's, candy, cookies and ice cream it's hard not to be a bit judgemental. In fact I feel so darn bad for the kids that I want to throttle these parents. I mean why on earth would you want your child going through life being unhealthy and picked on and teased by their peers? It's one thing for adults to do it to themselves but to inflict that on their kids? To me it's no better than letting the kids start smoking cigarettes at age 3.
But, I have two sisters with thyroid issues, and my heart breaks for them. Even with medication, and careful diets, they will never be thin.
I am hypothyroid, and I have seven adult women friends/acquaintances (I just counted) who are hypothyroid, and not a single one of us is overweight. Of the bunch, I'm the only one who works out regularly. One of my friends is downright skinny, and in fact, she is the one who has had the condition the longest...more than 20 years.
I will say that it's harder to lose weight, and it's harder to maintain a healthy weight, but it's not impossible. I work out about 8 hours a week, but I eat what I want. If I watched my diet a little more closely, I probably wouldn't need to work out so much.
Yes, there can be underlying medical problems in some cases, but the epidemic of obesity among children in this country is largely due to poor nutrition and inactivity. That's the reality of it. And it is a sad reality.
I try not to "judge" at all, but I do hold parents responsible for their children, just as I am responsible for my pets. If the child is under the age of majority, they are their parents responsibility.
Sadly, most parents don't understand how to best serve their bodies. Nutrition and exercise has not been stressed in our society, because it's only been the last fifty years that most people had the ability to over eat.
If I could effect one change in this world, I would start with our food industry. We should teach nutrition to our populations. Many items in the grocery should not be considered food. Anything that has calories without nutrition is not food -- it is only filler.
If I had two wishes, the second one would be a national image that involved physical fitness.
Our society has become so judgemental. A parent is condemned if their kid is anything but normal or if the parent is seen to do anything to control the child whether it be to do with food or discipline or exercise.
As I get older I try to be less judgemental yet at the same time, because we are quite strict and controlling as parents ourselves, I have to unfortunately watch out for others judging me.
Finally we all know what causes fat kids.
Fat food
No exercise
Yet putting kids on a diet, prohibiting or limiting certain foods is sure to bring out the "holier than thou" people who go on about child rights.
When I find myself shaking my head internally after seeing a big kid, I remind myself of my little friend 'John' and his family. John was diagnosed with Leukemia at 3, had some close calls and went through 3 years of chemotherapy. With chemo came steroids, and his weight went way up. He didn't lose his hair, so it isn't like you took one look and thought 'cancer'. You took one look and saw an unhealthy, overweight very young child.
He is in remission now, and has been cancer free awhile. He has lasting effects from the chemo - heart and kidney issues that should resolve over time. As he went through treatment he sometimes didn't want to eat anything; his parents encouraged his favorite foods. Now that he is healthy again, he will have to learn that he cannot always eat his most favorite things.....his weight is down, but he isn't slim - more on the chubby side.
So no, when I see children in town, or at the pool, I don't judge. And if my inner voice whispers 'ug' to me, well, I just remember John. You never know.
do you think there is a genetic predisposition or do you think it is all environment (when an overweight parent has overweight kids)?
Absolutely, but not necessarily overweight parents with overweight kids.
How many times have you seen a family with two or more children having one or two thin and one or more overweight? They sit at the same table every day. The overweight children may have the propensity to overeat, but there is something biologically different that causes that. Metabolism has a lot to do with it.
If a parent prepares the plates for the children, makes them all the same, and a couple of the kids are thin and one is not, it's not because the overweight one is overeating, it's because he metabolizes slower and puts on weight.
My best friend in grade school was as skinny as a rail. She ate like a horse, but never put on any weight. She has three sisters and two brothers and all but one other were overweight. They were a very active family. Living next to the school, the kids were on the playground climbing and playing all the years they were growing up, after school, weekends, vacations and all summer.
Look around and you will see the same thing; families with a thin child and a heavier child, or a combination with more kids.
I don't usually judge unless I know for a fact that it's from laziness and excessive eating. Parents complain that all Junior will eat is pizza and junk food, but it's the parent who purchases the food. Get the kids started on a diet like that at an early age and you will have fat kids, unless you have them with high metabolism and the burn it off quickly.
Yes...let's all be pc and 'tolerant' while obesity and its related illnesses kill off over 300,000 people a year because we don't want to offend the 1 person in 12 who actually can't help it.
Come on, guys...we did a great job with smoking by using peer and societal pressures...let's not let political correctness kill our brethren. It'll cost us all way too much.
I don't think anyone said anything about being tolerant of a serious health issue in this country. No comparison to smoking - smoking is a choice - no one comes out of the womb with a lit cigarette in their mouth, unable to remove it. Judging people simply by their appearance (or the appearance of their children) is a far different thing. Just because most people can help their weight, isn't an excuse to make judgements or snide comments across the board about someone's parenting skills. Work to fight childhood obesity? - absolutely. Educate, fight for better school lunches, more truthful advertising etc etc. I totally agree with all of that but to look at some random child at the park or at the mall and give a self righteous smirk about how bad that child's parents must be because "there is no excuse" for a child to be overweight is not right.
I don't think anyone said anything about being tolerant of a serious health issue in this country. No comparison to smoking - smoking is a choice - no one comes out of the womb with a lit cigarette in their mouth, unable to remove it. Judging people simply by their appearance (or the appearance of their children) is a far different thing. Just because most people can help their weight, isn't an excuse to make judgements or snide comments across the board about someone's parenting skills. Work to fight childhood obesity? - absolutely. Educate, fight for better school lunches, more truthful advertising etc etc. I totally agree with all of that but to look at some random child at the park or at the mall and give a self righteous smirk about how bad that child's parents must be because "there is no excuse" for a child to be overweight is not right.
You wouldn't say the same thing if the kid was smoking. But it is EXACTLY the same thing.
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