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I dip my hamburger too. ALTHOUGH I have found it less messy to rip a little piece off and dip it in rather than holding the whole thing. You may want to suggest it.
We were all taught manners growing up. It's disconcerting to sit at a table with someone who eats like a pig. It does something to the appetite.
If you don't convince him to be neater when he eats now, he will likely wish you had as he matures and sits at tables with girlfriends and their families, or professional business associates.
There's nothing wrong with expectations at the table when sitting down as a family. Others may think it's no big deal now, but when he is in high school and still making a mess, they WILL care when they sit across from him at the table.
Thank you nana053, lucygirl051, hothulamaui, and golfgal for the great suggestions!
I have considered finding a manners school, although I probably can't afford it (it would sure motivate my child to eat right though!).
I really like the video idea. I'll have to see if I can find a way to do that without my son knowing!
It doesn't really bother me when he eats messy at home and nobody is there to see it, except I now realize he eats that way all of the time, even when we are out or have company. I like the idea of having a motivator, I'll have to give that one some thought too.
golfgal, that is good that your husband ended up needing to be more concerned about the situation. I will have to talk to my husband. Starting the process of signing my son up for manners school might motivate my husband (I am guessing that he would not want me to spend money on manners school!).
Thank you again!
So I guess you want to humiliate your son. If someone taped me eating while I was a kid without knowing it and was made to watch the video I would feel betrayed.
give him a tv tray in the far corner of the room and tell him that untill he can use the manners others have then he can eat with the rest of ya..
There is NO EXCUSE for eating like a pig at the trough.. and folks who act like its fine for a 11 yr old to show a lack of manners need to be smacked for their stupid .. they eat that way to?
Good manners are a must and the KNOWEDLGE of them manners starts at home with family ... if he wants to eat like a slob use the tv tray and face it AND him to the wall .. he will smarten up pretty fast .. .. oh and tell granny and the rest to bag the crap .. your kid your rules ..
So I guess you want to humiliate your son. If someone taped me eating while I was a kid without knowing it and was made to watch the video I would feel betrayed.
It is almost impossible to humiliate 11 year old boys. He'll probably want to post it on You Tube.
Since he's leaving the table a mess, make it his job to clear it and rinse the dishes.
So I guess you want to humiliate your son. If someone taped me eating while I was a kid without knowing it and was made to watch the video I would feel betrayed.
My son would not be humiliated by the video idea, unless I put the video on Youtube (which I wouldn't do)!
He does not take me seriously that his eating is not acceptable for an 11 year old. He thinks he's eating the way other kids his age eat and that I am just being picky. If he saw what he looked like, I think he would change how he felt right away, and then he would want to work on his habits.
Also, my son can't stand to see food on anyone else's face for even a second (like one piece of rice). This is another reason I think the video would work (or maybe a mirror,.....hmmmm).
Also, I told him about this post and some of the feedback. He loved the $ idea, gasped at the manner class idea, and laughed at the video idea.
My 11 year old son has a messy eating style. For example, he'll dip his hamburger into his catsup instead of putting the catsup on his burger directly, and then the catsup will end up on his fingers from the dipping, and on his face from eating food that has catsup all over the outside, or he'll stick his fingers into a chicken drum stick and dip the chicken into his sauce (he started putting blue cheese dressing on chicken, or rather, chicken in blue cheese dressing).
Every time I try to correct or show him, my husband, my mother, his aunt, etc (whoever else is eating with us), will tell me to let him be, so my son now thinks that the way he eats is fine, and that I am just picky.
He's always eaten in a messy way, however, he's been into sauces lately, which is messy for him, plus as he gets older, I notice it more.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I am concerned about kids at school starting to notice and his friend's parents judging him.
I totally feel your pain! My kids are only 3 and 5 and I'm a table manners nazi! lol!
First of all i would have a talk with all of the other adults and let them know that you want your child to learn decent manners and they need to **** in front of the kid! lol. Then I would just keep on him! At the beginning of a meal let him know how you expect him to eat and then remind him through out. Also maybe serve his food in a way that he can't do the messing things (serve the chicken cut off the bone, serve the burger cut into bite size pieces etc). Also he's at an age where there is really no excuse for being THAT messy. He has the ability to eat correctly so he needs to do it. After a few times of correcting and reminding him, if he still disregards your instruction I would take the dips away. I'd tell him you can have ketchup, ranch etc when you can eat them properly with manners.
I know how you feel though. My husband, MIL, and Grandparent inlaws have the WORST manners EVER! They chew with their mouths open, start eating before all the food is on the table let alone before everyone is at the table etc! My MIL actually yelled at my oldest when he was 3 because he told her that he couldn't understand her with food in her mouth so he'll wait till she's done chewing!
He doesn't dip chicken wings into the sauce, he sticks his fingers all the way into the piece of chicken, pulls out a small piece of chicken, and then dips the small piece into the sauce! His fingers go into the sauce with the small piece of chicken, and the sauce gets all over his fingers. He eats the skin like this piece by piece too. Oh, then he takes a napkin and dabs sauce to clean it from the table (which doesn't really work because he dabs it), and then leaves the sauce all over his hand.
I do not eat pizza with a fork. You must be one of the people that tells me to stop trying to get my child to eat right!
I eat wings like that! I also lick my fingers! lol! BUT I wipe my mouth between bites and don't slop the sauce all over the table. I think maybe with wings he can be let go with the WAY he eats them, but concentrate on damage control. Stop after each wing, wipe your mouth and WIPE the mess on the table. At 11 he can wipe up his own mess!
give him a tv tray in the far corner of the room and tell him that untill he can use the manners others have then he can eat with the rest of ya..
There is NO EXCUSE for eating like a pig at the trough.. and folks who act like its fine for a 11 yr old to show a lack of manners need to be smacked for their stupid .. they eat that way to?
Good manners are a must and the KNOWEDLGE of them manners starts at home with family ... if he wants to eat like a slob use the tv tray and face it AND him to the wall .. he will smarten up pretty fast .. .. oh and tell granny and the rest to bag the crap .. your kid your rules ..
PLEASE don't even consider doing this! IMO that will do nothing but give him a weird unhealthy relationship with food.
You're one of those people who eats pizza with a knife and fork don't you....
I do it sometimes. What is wrong with it? And my kids always eat chicken nuggets with a fork and knife.
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I also lick my fingers! lol! BUT I wipe my mouth between bites and don't slop the sauce all over the table. I think maybe with wings he can be let go with the WAY he eats them, but concentrate on damage control. Stop after each wing, wipe your mouth and WIPE the mess on the table. At 11 he can wipe up his own mess!
