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Old 08-15-2010, 10:27 AM
 
18,712 posts, read 18,013,259 times
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They turn into whiney little pusscakes who just can't cope with life as a big person......


YouTube - 60% Of American University Students Feel Hopeless
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Old 08-15-2010, 11:17 AM
 
Location: Texas
38,863 posts, read 23,877,463 times
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Mox News? Is the University of Calgary an American University?
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Old 08-15-2010, 11:21 AM
 
12,917 posts, read 17,667,166 times
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The story does not effectively make the connection between "helicopter" parents and increasing mental illness on the campus. Try again.
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Old 08-15-2010, 01:21 PM
 
Location: Earth
24,626 posts, read 27,170,007 times
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I do know of parents coming to work to complain about evaluations in the workplace for junior, though.
If the kid weren't harassed by the workforce forever, he'd be lucky.
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Old 08-15-2010, 01:26 PM
 
Location: West Coast of Europe
25,544 posts, read 22,968,403 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Old Gringo View Post
Mox News? Is the University of Calgary an American University?
Yeah, the last time I looked on the map Canada was in America


First FOX news, now MOX new, what's next? SOX news? BOTOX news?


I remember I also felt lost at university, actually I still feel decades later
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Camberville
14,780 posts, read 19,749,229 times
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Well, look at the reality for many college students and recent grads.

The economy is in the tank. I graduated from a top American university with internships, jobs, study abroad, foreign language skills, 2 majors and 2 minors, and I can't even get a job at McDonalds.

I lived the last year college completely gripped by fear, depression, and anxiety. At one point, I was working 2 jobs and taking 5 classes- trying to get ahead so when I entered the workforce, I would be more marketable. I began applying for fellowships, consulting positions, and other programs (such as Teach for America) last fall. I applied for maybe 30 or 40 such positions, only got a call back from a few and made it to the final round of another, only to get cut. I took the Foreign Service Exam in the Spring, passed it with flying colors, but did not make it through the next cut. From January to May (when I graduated), I applied to over 300 jobs while taking 6 classes and working. I got the opportunity to be active with some local committees to network and became a familiar fixture in my college career center. By graduation, I had only had about 3 interviews and no offers. I moved back to Georgia with my then boyfriend.

This anxiety and depression destroyed my relationship of 2 years. We were on the path to get married, but my mental condition made me a really horrible person- I psychologically separated myself from how I was acting from who I was. I sat in the apartment every day and applied nonstop for jobs. At first I'd walk around the neighborhood and scout out shops and restaurants to see if they were hiring, but eventually even that go to be too much and I developed a fear of going outside. I had always thought that was something that only happened on TV or to the really crazy people, until it started happening to me.

Since the breakup, I have moved back home where I discovered that my parents' financial situation is dire. My mom is underemployed, my father's unemployment benefits recently ran out. We all lose COBRA health insurance at the end of the month. My diabetic father will not be able to get on private insurance and my mother might be able to, but will almost assuredly not be able to afford the cost. I feel beyond helpless because I can't even support myself, much less help my father.

Since graduation at the end of May, I have applied to well over 500 jobs, often applying from 8AM to 11PM. This is everything from fast food to bank teller jobs to administrative assistants to the fields I actually want to go into (higher education administration and nonprofits). If there's something I'm at all qualified to do, I apply. At this point, I have spent over $1000 financing myself to various interviews. Most of the time, I will go to a "final interview" and then never hear back- emails and phone calls unreturned. This happens even when they know I have traveled hundreds of miles to be there.

I am lucky in that I don't have any student loans to pay off. How can you not expect someone to be hopeless and depressed when they went to a good school, got a good degree, and now can't even get a job at a grocery store to pay off their loans? I'm 22 years old and never expected to be relying on my parents at this age. If I could go live in my car, I would, but I don't even have a car to facilitate that. Several people I know have killed themselves in their last months of school or shortly thereafter because what do you do when you know you will only be a drain on your parents? Not to mention hearing from the older generations "take any job". My local grocery stores are all staffed almost exclusively with people older than 40. There isn't "any job" to take, though I keep trying.

Perhaps some of it has to do with the "over-nurturing" parents today, but I would never have attributed my parents' parenting style as helicopter parents. They let me be independent- started me as a mother's helper by 11 and a babysitter by 12, told me that they hadn't saved for my college fund (a lie) to encourage me to work hard and get merit scholarships (which I did- a total of $140,000 worth for my 4 years), and very rarely helped me with money once I got to college. They just paid for my flights home and occasionally kicked me some money on holidays.

I moved out of my ex's place about a month ago. I have left my house 3 times since then, with the exception of a few interviews. I eat ramen noodles or nothing at all to make it cheaper for my parents. I do nothing but post on City-Data and apply for jobs. That's not a life. Unfortunately, it's a story not entirely uncommon among people my age, particularly when many of us are dealing with not only our own unemployment or underemployment, but that of our parents as well.

Even worse is that we can't afford metal health care. While you're in university, most schools have a mental health center for free or cheap. I used it quite frequently in my last year. Once you're out, reduced-cost mental health clinics are few and far between.

I know this will come out sounding like a completely self indulgent rant. The main point I want to make is that there is every reason in the world for a young person- often with little assets and too much debt- to be anxious, depressed, and hopeless. These are normal feelings when faced with such a serious recession. We're competing with out of work teachers for babysitting and nannying jobs, with retirees who need to supplement their SSI with grocery jobs, and with mid-level professionals for entry level jobs. It's messy for even the best of us.

Even in a good economy, it would be normal to feel anxious about the real transition to adulthood.
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:16 PM
 
Location: West Coast of Europe
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That sounds terrible, have you thought of moving away? Can't get any worse for you job-wise it seems
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:42 PM
 
Location: Camberville
14,780 posts, read 19,749,229 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neuling View Post
That sounds terrible, have you thought of moving away? Can't get any worse for you job-wise it seems
The problem is affording it. While I may very well have to move elsewhere with no firm job offer, I want to go as long as I can without having to go into debt. Right now I have just enough in savings for a smallish down payment on a used car(if I should need one) and money for first, last, and security deposit for rent.

I want a firm offer before I move. If I have spent months without getting Starbucks or grocery store type jobs in my suburban hometown where I have connections, I'm concerned about moving elsewhere with no safety net and expecting to find something quickly enough to support myself.
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:50 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,281 posts, read 83,360,452 times
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its not the helicoptering. its the type of parenting. discipline and punishment have been ditched.
the same things that make camp pendleton able to turn a 18 year old out of control primate slob into a marine-- in a few weeks -works at home.
many view this cruel-- but do not understand that the real world is far more cruel than camp pendleton.
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Old 08-15-2010, 02:50 PM
 
Location: West Coast of Europe
25,544 posts, read 22,968,403 times
Reputation: 9544
Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
The problem is affording it. While I may very well have to move elsewhere with no firm job offer, I want to go as long as I can without having to go into debt. Right now I have just enough in savings for a smallish down payment on a used car(if I should need one) and money for first, last, and security deposit for rent.

I want a firm offer before I move. If I have spent months without getting Starbucks or grocery store type jobs in my suburban hometown where I have connections, I'm concerned about moving elsewhere with no safety net and expecting to find something quickly enough to support myself.
I was in a similar situation years ago. I hated the company I was working for, so I just quit. But I did not find a new job, so month by month my savings were disappearing and after about a half year I had to decide what to do: wait and hope for a miracle or do something radical. I found a job abroad immediately and gone I was - and never returned
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