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Old 08-18-2010, 04:53 PM
 
Location: Australia
1,492 posts, read 3,222,225 times
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In times past there were many generations of the one family living under the one roof.
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Old 08-18-2010, 11:33 PM
 
852 posts, read 1,361,346 times
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This whole, "I won't help you if you didn't help me" thing is so rooted in bitterness and anger. It's sad when we start to think of our families that way.
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Old 08-20-2010, 10:12 AM
 
235 posts, read 464,192 times
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In some of my classmates case it's because it's because of the economy, getting a higher education and saving costs by staying at home, being closer to family by babysitting their younger siblings if needed.

I haven't left the roost yet either but once I get my college degree and a job I will be leaving the roost.
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Old 08-20-2010, 11:58 AM
 
Location: New York, NY
917 posts, read 2,939,254 times
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There are still young people who move out on their own- I moved out a week shy of my 18th birthday almost exactly eight years ago today and I only came home when they shut the dorms down for Christmas (I worked on campus or out of state over the summers). I got scholarships and grants that covered all of my tuition, all of my housing and most of my food and my parents only paid a small amount for my college years (probably less than they would have if I'd lived at home) and I've been fully financially self sufficient since 21. I have several friends who lived at home for a few years after graduating (including my fiance, who lived at home until he was 26) and the biggest difference I noticed was that I had a much lower standard of living- I didn't buy a lot of new toys or gadgets because I had to pay for all my rent and food. I also took jobs I wouldn't have taken if I had the option of not paying for rent/food. I scrubbed toilets at a hotel for a while to help pay for my grad school expenses. I'd like to think it paid off- I got admitted to a top grad program with a fellowship and I'm sure my work ethic and never say die attitude helped with that a lot. I am definitely more driven than most people I know, but that was true when I was 7 and lived with my parents, so that may just be my personality.

I would like to point out that not everyone living at home is wasting their time. My best friend stayed home for three years and saved up money for grad school, paid off all her student loans from undergrad, and bought a new car (that she paid off in 2 years) so that she didn't have to worry about car payments in school. My fiance has saved up a nice stash of cash that will either pay for an MBA with no loans at all or be a hefty down payment on a house. They were able to hold out and take jobs that paid well and interested them. I still have student loans I'm working on paying off and have minuscule savings since I have had to pay for all my living expenses for the last 4 years.

In any case, living at home or not, my friends and I are still better off than the 30 year old living at home in the basement, playing video games and refusing to work because they can't get their "dream job."
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Old 08-20-2010, 01:17 PM
 
Location: Westchester County
1,223 posts, read 1,681,970 times
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IMO some Parents have allowed this to exist. When a child moves out of the house on their own they are usually considered ADULTS. ADULTS have responsibilities and are held accountable for their actions. This new generation of ADULTS feel they are entitled to all the luxuries their PARENTS have worked hard for. Why work for it themselves when they can always go home and get it for free? I realize that the idea of a child working to support themselves seems to be a cruel concept, but generations before have done it with little or no issue.
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Old 08-20-2010, 01:33 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 4,676,169 times
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^^ Amen.
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Old 08-20-2010, 02:09 PM
 
72 posts, read 224,086 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SKP440 View Post
IMO some Parents have allowed this to exist. When a child moves out of the house on their own they are usually considered ADULTS. ADULTS have responsibilities and are held accountable for their actions. This new generation of ADULTS feel they are entitled to all the luxuries their PARENTS have worked hard for. Why work for it themselves when they can always go home and get it for free? I realize that the idea of a child working to support themselves seems to be a cruel concept, but generations before have done it with little or no issue.
That is just pure ignorance. I'm sorry but have you looked outside your window in the past 2 years? It is not the same world the parents grew up in. Hell, when my parents were starting out on their own you could get a decent job with only a high school education. Now you can't get a minimum-wage job with a college degree. There are no jobs, we are in an economic downturn. There were plenty of families living together under one roof during the depression and no one yelled at the kids for being lazy or worthless. You cannot expect the same results when the circumstances have changed so significantly. There are less opportunities out there even for young people with great ambition and work ethic who did everything right. The "generations before that did it with little or no issue" did not have the same nationwide economic situation to deal with.

Before you start casting stones and painting every young person as entitled, spoiled and irresponsible, maybe you should walk a day in their shoes. Give up all of the money you have ever earned in your life and start out with nothing. No job experience, no help from anyone else and go out there and see what it's like right now. It's not as easy as you think.
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Old 08-20-2010, 02:34 PM
 
4,471 posts, read 9,806,604 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SKP440 View Post
IMO some Parents have allowed this to exist. When a child moves out of the house on their own they are usually considered ADULTS. ADULTS have responsibilities and are held accountable for their actions. This new generation of ADULTS feel they are entitled to all the luxuries their PARENTS have worked hard for. Why work for it themselves when they can always go home and get it for free? I realize that the idea of a child working to support themselves seems to be a cruel concept, but generations before have done it with little or no issue.
SO So true. Recently my friend was looking for a new place with her roommate. Her and her roommate made a list of "demands":

1. Doorman
2. Must be on a high floor
3. Must be between 6th and 9th Avenues (we live in manhattan)
4. Must have a gym
5. Must have a roof deck
6. Must be new construction

Now a true bedroom with all those requests will probably set you back at least $5000 a month. I told her if she was willing to reevaluate her options she could find a really great place. She said very snidely "you like your brownstones I like my luxury" Well she got her luxury in a seedy part of town next to the Port Authority Bus Terminal (homeless people live on the steps). ALso they could only afford a one bedroom so someone has to live in the living room. All she does is complain about how her apartment is too small "but it's what you wanted" is all I say.

Me on the other hand, I am looking for move with my friend and we have a higher budget and the only thing we are looking for are a dishwasher and air conditioning. If anything I think living in a walk up will give me nice legs. The apartment we saw are below our budget and are HUGE and in great parts of the city. We can't wait to move in.

Some people think they need to live in the lap of luxury right out of college.
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Old 08-20-2010, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Westchester County
1,223 posts, read 1,681,970 times
Reputation: 1235
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lily2204 View Post
That is just pure ignorance. I'm sorry but have you looked outside your window in the past 2 years? It is not the same world the parents grew up in. Hell, when my parents were starting out on their own you could get a decent job with only a high school education. Now you can't get a minimum-wage job with a college degree. There are no jobs, we are in an economic downturn. There were plenty of families living together under one roof during the depression and no one yelled at the kids for being lazy or worthless. You cannot expect the same results when the circumstances have changed so significantly. There are less opportunities out there even for young people with great ambition and work ethic who did everything right. The "generations before that did it with little or no issue" did not have the same nationwide economic situation to deal with.

Before you start casting stones and painting every young person as entitled, spoiled and irresponsible, maybe you should walk a day in their shoes. Give up all of the money you have ever earned in your life and start out with nothing. No job experience, no help from anyone else and go out there and see what it's like right now. It's not as easy as you think.

My post wasn't directed at the children who left home as ADULTS and were able to get jobs. Hell, it wasn't even directed at those adult children who fell on hard times due to the economy. My post is speaking to those ADULTS who ether refuse to leave because they feel they are ENTITLED to stay home and sponge off of MOM and DAD while MOM and DAD continue to work their butts off, pay the bills and keep a roof over their grown child who (in some cases) went to school and still REFUSES TO TAKE THAT MINIMUM WAGE JOB (because apparently thats all there is out there). Its directed at those same ADULT children who even though they were taught about work ethic and shown by example what responsible ADULTS do they still insist on staying at home because its "easier" than going out and making it on your own.
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Old 08-20-2010, 02:41 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,352,998 times
Reputation: 41121
Quote:
Originally Posted by SKP440 View Post
My post wasn't directed at the children who left home as ADULTS and were able to get jobs. Hell, it wasn't even directed at those adult children who fell on hard times due to the economy. My post is speaking to those ADULTS who ether refuse to leave because they feel they are ENTITLED to stay home and sponge off of MOM and DAD while MOM and DAD continue to work their butts off, pay the bills and keep a roof over their grown child who (in some cases) went to school and still REFUSES TO TAKE THAT MINIMUM WAGE JOB (because apparently thats all there is out there). Its directed at those same ADULT children who even though they were taught about work ethic and shown by example what responsible ADULTS do they still insist on staying at home because its "easier" than going out and making it on your own.
Hmmmm.....guessing SKP's son still hasn't moved out?
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