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Is it pretty normal/par for the course for a new mother to really want to go out on the town within a month after giving birth? I guess there could be an overwhelming relief after the 9 months of no drinking and all that goes with pregnancy.
But I kind of thought that most new mothers pretty much nested with their new babies and it was hard to drag them away from the kid for the first few months. It's hard for me to understand a new mother's desire to hit the bars and 'drink some beers' (not that it's my business either way, but just curious). Oh, and this is not with the baby, of course. A babysitter is involved.
I say it is normal to want some time for yourself after your life is turned completely upside down. Going to dinner or out for a drink is one thing. Partying until all hours while your kid is with a sitter is another.
Going out to drink a few beers doesn't sound like too much to be doing but
I don't know that most women are up for a lot of partying and bar hopping within a month of giving birth. Even if they have someone to do all of the night feedings and they are getting plenty of sleep they may still be tired from delivery and recovering from pregnancy.
As for personal experiences...we didn't have family around to help the first month after childbirth so DH and I were both pretty worn out. Friends dropping by to see me and the baby was sometimes tiring. We had a standing couples dinner once a week that we made it to (and baby came along) but other than that it was a few month before we were out and about with some regularity. When things settled down we each went out a bit more with our friends and left baby at home with spouse. I was breastfeeding so I wouldn't have been drinking...but I don't drink anyway so it wasn't an issue.
I knew a couple who went on a long delayed honeymoon of 1 week only 6 weeks after the baby was born and they left the kid with a grandparent. Every body was aghast at that. The marriage didn't last and the kid was subsequently dropped off permanently with the grandparent. Turns out they didn't even want the kid in the first place.
Who has energy, time, clothes or money to party after childbirth?
every new parent needs an hour to themselves a few weeks after the baby is born, so i dont judge. i did however wait until he was close to a year before i took a necessary trip over a weekend and we left him with the grandparents. and i barely let a few hours go by without a phone call. i mean, who knows what they were doing to/with him--they have no idea how to raise a baby! other than that, we just took him everywhere we went. needless to say, we arent really bar people, so it wasnt a problem.
I felt relieved to return to work at 6 weeks old because I could go to the bathroom and eat a meal without interruption. But we had daycare where I worked. I could check on them whenever I wanted.
Not every mother needs to be dragged away from their babies. It doesn't make them bad mothers to have a healthy sense of self, as long as they're not neglecting their children. Although I personally would find something better to do with myself than go to a bar to drink. Then again, I don't drink so maybe that's why. But I did start going out dancing with my girlfriends when my first child was around 6 months old. We went out about once a month to once every six weeks.
Is it pretty normal/par for the course for a new mother to really want to go out on the town within a month after giving birth? I guess there could be an overwhelming relief after the 9 months of no drinking and all that goes with pregnancy.
But I kind of thought that most new mothers pretty much nested with their new babies and it was hard to drag them away from the kid for the first few months. It's hard for me to understand a new mother's desire to hit the bars and 'drink some beers' (not that it's my business either way, but just curious). Oh, and this is not with the baby, of course. A babysitter is involved.
What say you and what was your experience?
Can you give more info? Is this mother married or single? Did she want the baby or was it an unplanned/unwanted pregnancy?
To answer your question, we got our first home from the NICU when she was 4 weeks so no partying, we were still in shock. With our second I wasn't able to nap when the baby napped because I had a toddler so I didn't have the energy to go anywhere.
Both were c-sections so it took longer to recover.
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other than that, we just took him everywhere we went. needless to say, we arent really bar people, so it wasnt a problem.
