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I cannot imagine not raising my own children. But then again I do remember the HUGE fuss when Princess Di refused to have the army of Nannies when her children were born, even if they were royalty. There are some people, people like doctors and SAHM's, who can and do have nannies. I just can't imagine wanting or doing such a thing.
BTW, TXTQUEEN how are you doing? Hope it is all going well for you!!!
Your mother must have done something right if you felt that way when you were younger.
Almost everyone misses home when they first move.
When I moved out, I moved to another city.
At first, I came home every weekend. Eventually, I came home once a month.
After a while, I only came home once every few months----mostly just for holidays.
You'll get used to it. It's called adjustment. Everyone goes through it when they make big changes in their lives.
I just don't know when that will be...
I don't know if I will ever get used to it..
Quote:
Originally Posted by okpondlady
I cannot imagine not raising my own children. But then again I do remember the HUGE fuss when Princess Di refused to have the army of Nannies when her children were born, even if they were royalty. There are some people, people like doctors and SAHM's, who can and do have nannies. I just can't imagine wanting or doing such a thing.
BTW, TXTQUEEN how are you doing? Hope it is all going well for you!!!
Idk, I love an environment where its calm and quiet, where I can come and go as I please and where I can use a car just about whenever I want but I miss being at home and really miss it a lot.
It's actually a lot harder emotionally than I thought it would be and while I wasn't all that happy being at home, I just don't know, I am extremely homesick, even though I am less than a mile from my mom's house, I miss being in my comfort zone and everything.
I just really really want to be back home where I can be
"comfortable".
But at the same time I really shouldn't still be living at home..
I'm really sad. I enjoy seeing the kids and everything and when I am busy I am ok but at night I get really sad and when I go see my mom I get really sad and I just kinda really want to be back at home in my bedroom.
You'll get used to it. You have to get used to it. You can't live at home for the rest of your life.
Also, realize there is always a huge adjustment---even coming from somewhere that's unhealthy.
You're going to miss the roller coaster ride of the drama at your house. Make sure you don't pick relationships with men who provide the same feeling of drama.
You need to focus on finding health relationships with people who don't play head games or fight constantly. Being with a calm family will be good for you.
Even if you only stay for a year, you will have been exposed to what a healthier household is like. You'll be better equipped to provide that to your own children.
This is the time in your life where you find yourself. You're going to spend most of your life by yourself (even after marriage) and you need to learn to be happy by yourself.
Idk, I love an environment where its calm and quiet, where I can come and go as I please and where I can use a car just about whenever I want ...
What you want only exists if you work hard for it. Nobody is going to hand you a life where it's nice and calm and you go in and out of a blissful home and Taco Bell is free every night and your car is in the driveway and the tank is always full.
Congratulations. You are out there in the real world and it is not easy. Now you can either get tough and stick with it, or you can go home to Mom and fall back into a place you yourself call hell.
Barring any Rockefellers posting, every single person on this board has to work hard for a few moments of peace and quiet at the end of the day. You have now joined the real world. It's a tough, difficult place. There is no free lunch. There is no spoon.
Knuckle down and buckle up because it is a very bumpy ride.
Its not the being out that bothers me.
I feel alone, I am living with strangers, my friends have moved away and I don't like this. If I was living with a friend or in a place of my own that would be ok but I'm not. I miss my dog, I miss my living room, I miss my neighborhood, I miss a lot of it..
Sometimes I feel it might be best to just keep the job but move back home and get out at a later time when better motives and everything can be put behind it..
You JUST moved out! You're not even giving yourself a chance to adjust. That's irresponsible and immature.
EVERYONE goes through feeling lonely at your age. Friends move away after high school and college. That's what happens. You learn how to make new friends and a new life.
And most of us left our family pets too because most young adults aren't equipped to take care of a pet when starting out.
You move back home, you won't have a car. The car is part of the living arrangement, not part of nannying except for nanny purposes.
You're not going to mature by postponing it. It won't matter when you move out of your mother's house, you'll still go through what you're going through now.
I know you dont' want to hear "I told you so" but we warned you that it would be difficult to live with another family.
You made the choice anyway. Being an adult is learning to live with the consequences of decisions you make.
You made a committment to this family to be their nanny. You've only been there a week.
Don't prove your mother and everyone else right by running home without even giving it a reasonable chance.
Reasonable is many, many months, not just a few weeks.
You JUST moved out! You're not even giving yourself a chance to adjust. That's irresponsible and immature.
EVERYONE goes through feeling lonely at your age. Friends move away after high school and college. That's what happens. You learn how to make new friends and a new life.
And most of us left our family pets too because most young adults aren't equipped to take care of a pet when starting out.
You move back home, you won't have a car. The car is part of the living arrangement, not part of nannying except for nanny purposes.
You're not going to mature by postponing it. It won't matter when you move out of your mother's house, you'll still go through what you're going through now.
I know you dont' want to hear "I told you so" but we warned you that it would be difficult to live with another family.
You made the choice anyway. Being an adult is learning to live with the consequences of decisions you make.
You made a committment to this family to be their nanny. You've only been there a week.
Don't prove your mother and everyone else right by running home without even giving it a reasonable chance.
Reasonable is many, many months, not just a few weeks.
I know and I never said I was GOING TO do anything....just what I wanted to do.
I made a promise to my friend, who I broke down crying in front of tonight that I would give it a shot, that 2 weeks from now, I would at least reevaluate how I was feeling about it all and if I still felt the same way I do now.
This is the third night in a row that I have been absolutely crying, I don't know why but like this is a sweet set up and all but part of me wants to be in the comfort of my own home.
I know and I never said I was GOING TO do anything....just what I wanted to do.
Okay. But you have a tendancy to OCD about stuff until you convince yourself. Just like all you could think about was leaving your mothers. Dont' let yourself constantly think about leaving here. Read a book. Go jogging. Do something. Just don't allow yourself to OCD about this to the point that you convince yourself you can't do it. YOU CAN DO THIS!
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen
I made a promise to my friend, who I broke down crying in front of tonight that I would give it a shot, that 2 weeks from now, I would at least reevaluate how I was feeling about it all and if I still felt the same way I do now.
Two weeks isn't long enough for giving it a shot. Promise to stick to it for six months. Then reevaluate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen
This is the third night in a row that I have been absolutely crying, I don't know why but like this is a sweet set up and all but part of me wants to be in the comfort of my own home.
It's not your home. It's your mother's home.
It takes a long time for a new place to feel like home. Even when you have your own place, it takes time.
I swear it took a few years before my current house felt like home. I just did not feel comfortable here at first. I couldn't relax.
NOTHING ever feels like the home we grew up in. I'm in my mid-40s, married and have my own children, and NOTHING has ever felt like my parents' house.
Suck it up! You can do this!
Quote:
Originally Posted by eugene1976
You don't have your priorities straight enough to live in another family's house.
They will expect you to keep your living quarters clean----just like your mother expects.
This truly could be a disaster waiting to happen. You are not a very submissive person.
This isn't the type of job where you can expect to argue fairness. You will have to live by their rules.
Read the whole thread. She's already living there.
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