U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Closed Thread Start New Thread
Old 01-02-2011, 04:52 PM
3 posts, read 3,443 times
Reputation: 15


I totally understand the point of view of not wanting something forced on you. Especially if you disagree and are not seeing what others are seeing. I'm sure your parents are trying to help you, so I agree with the "sit down and talk " feedback. Basically you should listen to your parents until you are officially an adult, but it is important that you effectively communicate with your parents.

Personally, I was the same way as you and my kids are now the same to some degree. For us now, there is resistance to go to church, but thankfully just about every time we go to church, things are great afterwards as we have received something very valuable. I feel as though our church "feeds" us well.

From my perspective, I think that God made us to become more independent as we get older and it is a good thing that you challenge what is presented if there are questions. As parents, we can often be a little off and ineffective in leading our children in certain areas but we must admit that if there IS a God then God's understanding is far above ours and it wouldn't be fair to fit our belief into only what we can currently understand.

So for now, it is best to obey your parents, if not from a from a biblical then a moral standpoint and be open to what you hear because your belief is personal and you need to make your own choices for yourself and for when you want to direct your children some day.

I hope for the best for you in your choices.

Old 05-17-2014, 01:51 PM
Location: None of your business.
1 posts, read 1,204 times
Reputation: 10
I think they should not force you to go to church. Although I am 14, I study a lot of legal rights. So, you're Atheist and not a Christian. You have freedom of religion. Your parents should not have the right to make you go to church with them because you do not follow Christianity. Nobody is allowed to tell you which religion to follow, as well as your parents. Therefore, you have the right not to go to church with them.
Old 05-17-2014, 02:05 PM
3,438 posts, read 4,866,352 times
Reputation: 5408
I certainly will dictate that my kid goes to church as long as they are under 18 years old, living under my roof, and placing their feet under my table while they eat my groceries.

I will also dictate that while under 18 and living under my roof they will attend school whether they believe in school or not.
Old 05-17-2014, 02:29 PM
1,615 posts, read 3,279,464 times
Reputation: 2269
I know this is an old thread and the OP is 20 now but it is still relevant. Under the law, children in the United States are fully formed human beings with the same basic constitutional rights that adults enjoy. I believe your religion is personal. Even the Amish let their children out in the world to decide for themselves.

To force your beliefs on your children AFTER they have decided to go a different direction at that moment in their life is, I THINK, disgusting.

Would you expect a house guest of yours to go to church if they were Jewish? What if you hosted a foreign exchange student and they were Muslim? Would you force them too?

Don't force people to drink your kool-aide. Or you can sour them on your faith forever.
Old 05-18-2014, 03:28 AM
1,309 posts, read 932,646 times
Reputation: 1755
I'm sorry they are forcing that ridiculous nonsense down your throat. I think every parent does stupid things and there's not much you can do other than deal with it for now. They're clearly ruining their future relationship with you and its only a few years until you can get them out of your life forever.

If you want, the best thing to do is just refuse to go and have the battle with them, you'll likely wear them down if you stay on path and refuse to go week after week although they'll punish you and likely take away your privileges. If you just do what you want and sneak out and ignore them enough, parents eventually give up hope and stop trying to push stuff down your throat, worked for me when I was a bit younger.

Last edited by Jaded; 05-19-2014 at 11:08 PM..
Old 05-19-2014, 02:45 PM
Location: Massachusetts
10,087 posts, read 11,153,887 times
Reputation: 14103
Around 16 is when I made the choice to not have religion.

I was in a Private Catholic HS at the time. I entered into an age of questioning things, which focused mostly on Science as I began to have a serious interest that eventually led me to my engineering career years later. It wasn't enough to know that an airplane could fly, I needed to know why and how and what scientific principle made it happen.

It was in the religion classes in HS that i began to ask questions to the teacher that didn't really satisfy me. It just didn't make logical sense. Every think else in the world had logical sense behind it, but religion required...faith.

Around 18 or so i finally decided I was an Atheist. I was off to college so not much my parents could do or say. I'm 33 now and it still causes a little friction here and there, but for the most part it's a decision that, for me, was the right one.

Gotta do what's right for you
Old 05-19-2014, 03:15 PM
7,697 posts, read 8,470,446 times
Reputation: 15144
Originally Posted by Handel View Post
Where I'm from a lot of people are hardcore Christians. I grew up going to church etc. But now, at 16 I've decided I'm no longer Christian. I've thought about it for a long time, and I'm now an atheist.

However, my parents are still trying to force me to go to church and pray etc. I don't know why they can't just go and let me stay home or go to a friend's house or something. They can't force me to believe, so why force me to go? How do I convince them to just leave me alone?

That's pretty much how every religion continues - force the children into it and present it as some non-negotiable truth from Day 1. Adult converts are a much smaller number.

You'll soon leave the house. Just use the church-time as a time to philosophize, and think about what you intend to do in life and how so.
Old 05-19-2014, 04:24 PM
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,496 posts, read 44,996,382 times
Reputation: 47401
OP is now 20 years old as this thread was started 4 years ago. Surely he is out of the house and making his own decisions by now.
Old 05-19-2014, 08:34 PM
483 posts, read 550,422 times
Reputation: 586
It is your parents' job to keep you healthy and raise you to be a good adult. According to them they would be neglectful if they ignored your spiritual health. When you raise your children you can raise them in the way you feel would be best. Good luck to you.
Old 05-19-2014, 09:40 PM
Location: Oak Cliff! That's my hood!
103 posts, read 112,415 times
Reputation: 173
Originally Posted by Teddy52 View Post
I certainly will dictate that my kid goes to church as long as they are under 18 years old, living under my roof, and placing their feet under my table while they eat my groceries.
Freedom of religion...food to eat. Freedom of religion...hot water. Shoooooot, you better praise the Lord and pass the peas (like we used to say).
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Closed Thread

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2020, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top