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I'm "like around" () 24 and my mom still tries to hold my hand while crossing the street.
So does mine, and I'm 31
She even invades my shower uninvited and demands she scrape my backside coz I'm taking athletic showers, given that I take three showers a day and am always on the run somewhere
Oh, two nights ago I was awake working on a deck for Monday.
She woke up, started throwing a fit and even slapped me. Then brought me coffee LOL. I was telling her she is answerable to my fiancee for any slapping damage she can potentially cause.
Like for example; I have relatives like my Aunt(who is like the 2nd mother), My uncle(my father figure), Great Aunt, and a few others that's been knowing that I can take care of myself(such as me knowing when to brush my teeth. wash my clothes, groom myself and a few other things) since I was 8 or 9 years old. Unfortentantly, my does not recognize that and even though I'm 23 she still is trying to be a mother to me like I'm back in elementary and despite a few others like my relatives or her friends suggesting to her(mom) that I'm not a kid anymore she always like to come up with any excuse to keep continuing this cycle. Sure, she is a mother however I believe that parents should "let go" their sons or daughters. Especially when they want their sons or daughters to become responsibile on their own.
Like, move away and like, be done with her! Totally!
I left home at 18. By 23, I had served 4 years in the military, lived in Europe on my own in an apartment, and was putting myself through college. I can't imagine being around a monther at that age who treated me like a child. By 23, you should be on your own or at least in college working on a Masters degree plus working and having your own life.
My mom does that to me...she somehow thinks that I cannot function in life without her. Mind you I live up at university for 3/4 of the year without her in my everyday presence. In my case, even if I move out, my mom will still find way to be super-naggy and somewhat controlling about things. My goal is to be able to hang out with friends at my own place in the summertime after graduation!
Sorry girls it never ends. My mother was 86 and I was 60 when she was telling me I did my makeup wrong and shouldn't be wearing a certain kind of skirt...... and she had Alzheimers. Once a mother always a mother.
All you can do is learn to ignore it or smile and nod, or do both.
Everyday my mom tells me the dumbest crap, like to shut the car door after getting out of the car, she'll say as she's going into the house, "make sure you shut your door" or the other night I was cooking and she told me to make sure I turned off the burners. Half the time I want to reply "no sh*t" but I just stare at her like you just actually told me to do that and she'll walk off.
Sometimes if I am in a bad mood, I'll reply "do I look stupid?".
If the "adult" acts like an adult, I think it is much easier for moms to let go. If they act like an idiot and tend to have poor impulse control or make unfortunate decisions, then I think that keeps a mom tied longer because she thinks that more "training" is needed.
All you can do is learn to ignore it or smile and nod, or do both.
Everyday my mom tells me the dumbest crap, like to shut the car door after getting out of the car, she'll say as she's going into the house, "make sure you shut your door" or the other night I was cooking and she told me to make sure I turned off the burners. Half the time I want to reply "no sh*t" but I just stare at her like you just actually told me to do that and she'll walk off.
Sometimes if I am in a bad mood, I'll reply "do I look stupid?".
But find what works for you.
Yes! It's like you've been knowing what to do since you were like in elementary school and been having common sense, yet you get treated like you don't know what to do even though you've been knowing for years already.
Yes! It's like you've been knowing what to do since you were like in elementary school and been having common sense, yet you get treated like you don't know what to do even though you've been knowing for years already.
But when you're an adult of 23, you are supposed to have evolved PAST what you knew in elementary school.
If you don't demonstrate any evolution of core systems, such as common sense, the ability to comprehend and prepare for future consequences of current behavior, some method of acquiring enough financial stability to become independent, some other method of ensuring that you don't blow all that financial security on the latest skin care or trim for your ride..
if you don't demonstrate that you have evolved beyond the level of elementary school comprehension of life, then you should expect that some people - particularly mom - will continue treating you as though you were in elementary school.
You're 23 and living at home. You lived at home in elementary school. You're an adult, who should be out of the house and living on your own, or creating your own family with a spouse, or at LEAST contributing to the household expenses by footing the grocery and utility bills with your full-time job while you save the rest to get your own place.
It sounds like you have not done this. You have stagnated in your elementary life. So - you're treated like an elementary kid. Do things that adults do to prove that they're independent adults who don't need their mommy around telling them what to do, and your mommy will be less of a nudge.
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