adult woman wont leave my 11yr daughter alone. help

[CharlotteGal]

Originally Posted by help77

They never had a relationship and she is not old enough to pay a cell phone bill nor should a grown woman be asking her to keep their relationship a secret. until she is 18 or gets a job her welfare is in my hands. Its not my daughters fault but the cell phone is another issue. She proved to be too young to discern good judgement at the time this woman asked her to keep this a secret. but thank u for ur opinion.

Did you ask her why she did it? She may want a relationship with this woman. Why did you feel a restraining order was called for - it sounds like you initially got one because she was calling you, and called you names? It's impossible for us to know the situation, but it really sounds like major over-reaction on your part. I can only know by what you've written here, and from what you've written, you are blowing things way out of proportion.

[DewDropInn]

In the wild the small creature who is being attacked swells up to make the bad-guy, bigger predator think he's Gigantor. Predator thinks twice and backs off.

Attorney. Aggressive attorney who handles these cases all of the time. And you need your Momma She-Wolf personality every time you deal with this woman.

[Houston_2010]

Originally Posted by help77

This is my brothers ex wife. she has made so many lives miserable. i dont know why she has it out for me. she tried to bfriend me only after my brother divorced her. i was nice but never returned calls . she would call over and over and i finally askd her to not call and my world turned to hell.. she was mean and called me names and slandered my name. i had to get a restraining order and it only got worse. she sent people i didnt know to call and harass me . my phone was traced and her roomate was the one calling me. i got a random restraining order from someone i didnt ven know so if i was in public i would never know who this person was. the orders finally expired . i never made any efforts to contact her and now she has made sevral attempts to contact my daughter thru email and cell phone. i moniter everything. i have blocked her . i have not prsonally asked her to stop again hoping it would stop and not wake up the monster .. well now she has successfully as of today managed to text my daughter and was so persuasive as to get a response out of my daughter.. she asked my daughter pls send pictures and remember to delete texts and put her under different name. my daughtr to my shock said yes heres ur pic and i will delete and not tell. i have her cell phone now , she has lost it forever and am going to police but i must admit im a bit fearful of her retaliation but will go to any length to protect my daughter. help.. is this something i will have to deal with? what do i do to stop this.. ? pls? im desperate for sane advice??

I don't have kids your kid's age, but I have nieces. They do have cell phones but pretty much use them to call/text the people in the family and close friends. Otherwise, they are supposed to notify their parents when some "random" person contacts them. Teach your daughter to tell you "weird" communication she receives, especially if the other person asks to keep it secret (it could be her former aunt-in-law or it could be an unknown child predator). Stranger Danger. Heck, I'm an adult and when someone calls that it's not already on my address book, I hesitate to answer.

Do you know why is she so insistent on being your friend or reaching to your daughter? May need to confront her and sort things out (if that's even possible).

Change your daughter's number immediately. Have only mom,dad, close friends to note the new number. If you don't want to change her number, some cell phone carriers will allow you to go on the website and block that number (so your phone doesn't even ring). Even if restraining order is expired, I would report to authorities as follow up. No business for a non-family adult to be calling your daughter.

I know this is nowhere close to what you are experiencing, but several years ago, we would get insistent calls from some guy (telemarketer), every night at the same time. The few times we would pick up the phone to see what he wanted, he would start talking, talking and we couldn't stop him. I called my local police department (non-emergency) and asked if there was anything I could do to stop this person from calling. The officer took the note, called the guy and have him a warning. Never heard back from the caller again!

Good luck and I hope this doesn't escalate to more grief for you or your family.

[Hopes]

Originally Posted by CharlotteGal

Did you ask her why she did it? She may want a relationship with this woman. Why did you feel a restraining order was called for - it sounds like you initially got one because she was calling you, and called you names? It's impossible for us to know the situation, but it really sounds like major over-reaction on your part. I can only know by what you've written here, and from what you've written, you are blowing things way out of proportion.

I don't think he's blowing her contacting his daughter out of propotion. It sounds like she is a stalker. He has had restraining orders against her in the past for her behavior towards him personally, yet she still tries to contact his family, his daughter. It doesn't matter what reason he got the first restraining order. The most glaringly obvious clue that the women is a nut is the very fact she is trying to contact his daughter even after he has had restraining orders. A normal person would not contact a minor child of a person how had a restraining order against them.

[Sgoldie]

Two possibilities. This woman was a part of your family a long time, everyone got on well, and she misses being part of the family.

But, this sounds too sneaky and I'm betting she's doing this in order to get you to have your brother, her X husband, call her even if it's to tell her to stop. This is stalking and it's aggressive.

Is there anybody else in your family who's say an older authority figure maybe your husband or even someone in her family who she's afraid of that can tell her to back off? If not your only recourse is an attorney or the police.