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This is a new time, kids shouldn't be taking care of a bunch of younger siblings, they should be focusing on themselves, having a childhood of their own, and prepping themselves in all ways for the future.
This is 2011, not way back during little house on the prairie times.
If all kids know is taking care of a family then how do you expect them to function in the real world of today?
Yet kids who are allowed "to be kids" (which is synonymous with no responsibilities and coddling to the point of suffocation) they will be primo adults ready to take on the world?
That kind of thinking is backwards.
I don't care what the calendar says. There is no "normal" family nor should there be.
I agree with others that the parents expect the oldest children to help raise the younger ones. A friend of mine whom I don't really talk to much anymore is pregnant with her 5th child. Financially she is a mess and the last thing she needs is to bring another baby into the world. I asked her how she was going to manage it and her response was that the older children will help out. Financially she takes advantage of any free program she can get her hands on. At Christmas she lets it slip to her kid's teachers about how things are tight and she usually gets some sort of assistance via Goodfellows or donations. The oldest boy is the only one that ever gets anything new. Whatever he outgrows goes to the younger kids.
Last edited by fallingwater; 04-12-2011 at 08:32 AM..
Reason: spelling
I agree with others that the parents expect the oldest children to help raise the younger ones. A friend of mine whom I don't really talk to much anymore is pregnant with her 5th child. Financially she is a mess and the last thing she needs is to bring another baby into the world. I asked her how she was going to manage it and her response was that the older children will help out. Financially she takes advantage of any free program she can get her hands on. At Christmas she lets it slip to her kid's teachers about how things are tight and she usually gets some sort of assistance via Goodfellows or donations. The oldest boy is the only one that ever gets anything new. Whatever he outgrows goes to the younger kids.
I have a problem with her using assistance as a means of supporting her growing family if she isn't actively engaged in seeking other ways to support herself.
I do not have any issue with her expecting her older children to help out.
The biggest family I personally knew had 8 kids. I went to school with the second oldest and we were friends up through college. They definitely relied upon a system where the older kids helped out with the younger kids, but it wasn't like the older ones raised the younger ones. Watching the younger ones so mom can go to the store, or helping them with their homework or to get ready to go out doesn't constitute "raising" them in my book. Overall they were a pretty happy family, but finances were tight. Probably the biggest complaint I ever heard one of them make was that they would kill for their own room or bathroom, since it was setup that all the boys shared one room and all the girls shared another with one bathroom between them.
The biggest issue I had/have with large families is ones who take public assistance. Since "poverty" level is based on the size of the family, it is quite easy to qualify for all sorts of programs like health insurance, food assistance, free lunch programs, etc. even on a normal middle class income if your family is large. The family I knew all had state sponsored health insurance, received free lunch at school and got food subsidies. If you can't afford to pay for your kids, you shouldn't have them. Conversely, the government shouldn't be subsidizing large families. Unlike Europe we don't really have a declining population issue.
I have 3 boys, plus one of their friends that for some reason never went home....ugh, you just learn how to ignore them after a while....................
either that or find a good hiding place in the house.
you want to spend 12-25 years of your life being pregnant?
2 was enough for me!!!!!!!!!
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