Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have 5 year old twins. One became obsessed with death, the other did not. So much so that he once wished (throwing penny in a fountain) that he would never die. That was a bit heart breaking. He asked me about death and all the poeple that have died and how did they die.. ect. I simply tell him that he does not have to worry about death because it will likely come in 100 years from now.
My four year old has a lot of questions on death too, but as a sheep farmer this is normal I guess. We have to take a lot of sick lambs into the house during lambing season, and its pretty easy to figure out that the healthy lambs do not come inside, and healthy lambs don't die. For that reason its not uncommon for us to see 30-40 lambs die (sheep farming has a very high mortality rate compared to other farming ventures.) Because of that my daughter has come to grips with death, not just with lambs and sheep, but with her Great-Grandparents deaths, etc.
Overall, I think it is healthy. This was the way it was just 75 years or so ago when almost everyone lived on the farm.
I think it all depends on your beliefs and what you believe about dying..
My religious beliefs is a big factor in this subject and I tell my kids according to our beliefs..
You say that, and they will never want to go to sleep again! When a pet dies, you also don't say "Fluffy was put to sleep" for the same reason.
My kids asked about that age. It was an obsession for a while with my oldest. It's been so long, I forgot what I had said to them. I know I would answer their questions honostly. If you believe in heaven, tell them that is where we go. Charles, some people do believe in heaven.
First of all, I won't brainwash her with superstitious nonsense about going to heaven.
I tell her what we know. About reincarnation: Probably not - no one has ever experienced it and it has never been documented. You could say dying is like taking " a long nap".
And the child's next question will be: "How long of a nap?"
My 5year old son asks questions about death as well.
When I talk to my child about such profound topics, I can only be as honest as I can and tell him what *I* believe happens. I don't think I would do him service in trying to be too vague, or telling him that I don't know, have no idea and that he is too young to think about those things. I tell him that I *believe* in heaven and that God loves us and will accept us in His Kingdom after we die. I don't scare him, use any scare tactics or enforce that I'm right. I'm very honest in the fact that it's MY belief.
i personally have given my 6 year old daughter both sides. when she asked me what happens i told her that everyone dies and no one really knows what happens but this is what some people believe and this is what other people believe.
that caused us to get into a religion discussion in which, again, i gave her both sides. i'm not religious myself but i am not going to make any of those decisions for her.
Although for an adult the long nap seems euphemistical and actually almost welcomed (mmm...naps!), a child's perspective can be different.
I happen to know a mum who tied the long nap explanation and her little girl was horrified of falling asleep or waking up screaming in terror. Somehow she thought that if long nap is similar to death, then death can also occur during a nap.
Funny, maybe this is developmental since my 4-year-old started talking about death towards the end of last year. He asked where his grandpa was (my mother-in-law's husband) and I think she told him Heaven after which he came home and said the Almighty God makes all things on Earth. DH used to be Catholic but doesn't share those beliefs so much anymore. What concerns me is started talking about death with the other kids at preschool, and now all we hear about is kill this transformer, that transformer or superhero died, etc. etc., until we told him to stop talking about "not nice" things because he started saying "I'm going to kill you" to a teacher!!! He doesn't get the permanence of death so he says "I'm going to make you dead" when he pretends with his Optimus Prime and Megatron toys and after being "killed" Prime pops back up and lives again! It's just very disturbing to hear him say these words. Luckily the teacher understands where it comes from (him hanging out with 6-year-olds) and didn't take it as a sign of budding violence. I'm going to try to talk to him about it during a quiet time and use Zimbochick's link so that he understands better about death, and that it's not something to chat about like a game with his friends.
First of all, I won't brainwash her with superstitious nonsense about going to heaven.
I tell her what we know. About reincarnation: Probably not - no one has ever experienced it and it has never been documented. You could say dying is like taking " a long nap".
Do you ever actually read your posts after you click the reply button? "a long nap"..."tell her what we know".. in your expert thoughts how about you either get incinerated to ashes and discarded or you get put in a coffin so the bugs can eat and we will never see you again...."a long nap"
Tell your child you love her/him..Death is not something they need to be concerned about because there is nothing you can do about it, and go from there.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
He doesn't get the permanence of death so he says "I'm going to make you dead" when he pretends with his Optimus Prime and Megatron toys and after being "killed" Prime pops back up and lives again! It's just very disturbing to hear him say these words. Luckily the teacher understands where it comes from (him hanging out with 6-year-olds) and didn't take it as a sign of budding violence. I'm going to try to talk to him about it during a quiet time and use Zimbochick's link so that he understands better about death, and that it's not something to chat about like a game with his friends.
