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Old 06-07-2011, 01:59 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
14,785 posts, read 24,083,908 times
Reputation: 27092

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My sister is always telling her son that if things dont work out you can come home , this man is 38 yrs old and has a daughter that does not live with him and he has two failed marriages . Well he lives with a young woman who is 36 , she does not have family close by . I tell her that she needs to be more like her mother in law who tells her kids , No sir you go back and work it out . She says she cannot be that kind of mother . Well she now has her daughter who has been married twice as well and is married to a man in prison in another state living with her too . So here she is 73 and has her 38 yr old son and her 43yr old daughter living with her . what do you think of this ? Im ashamed of my sister coddling her adult kids like this and I am also mad at them for sponging off their mother and her allowing it . I tell her to kick them out and make them get their own place . Well a couple of days ago the sons gf 's mom was in town and went over to my sisters to talk to her 38 yr old son . This gfs mother told my sister that none of her kids are capable of having a meaningful relationship and that she was part of the problem . My sister thought that was outrageous of that girls mom to come and say such things about her baby boy , he has done nothing wrong . I just looked at her and wonder how we come from the same set of parents .What say the rest of you ? Is she coddling and babying her kids or what ?
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:08 PM
 
Location: here
24,873 posts, read 36,167,496 times
Reputation: 32726
In my family, we can't believe that my dad and his sister were raised by the same parents. But they are adults, and can live their lives as they want. Failed marriage, kids, or not, a 38 yo should be able to support himself and get his own place to live IMO.
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:12 PM
 
538 posts, read 1,521,889 times
Reputation: 723
Quote:
Originally Posted by phonelady61 View Post
My sister is always telling her son that...
I think "what does this have to do with you?" and let your sister's business be her business.

I found it very interesting that you referred to the woman, 36, as "young woman." Maybe this is part of the problem. You and your sister refer to these near-middle-aged adults as "young", and therefore they are acting the part.

But, still, don't lose sleep over your sister's business if it has no affect on you.
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:23 PM
 
Location: In a house
13,250 posts, read 42,780,434 times
Reputation: 20198
Also, I find it curious that the 36-year-old "young" woman's MOTHER would go to your sister's house to scold her for how sis is handling her own children.

Doesn't anyone teach their kids to become independent adults some time before they turn 30 anymore?
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:28 PM
 
32,516 posts, read 37,172,734 times
Reputation: 32581
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnonChick View Post
Also, I find it curious that the 36-year-old "young" woman's MOTHER would go to your sister's house to scold her for how sis is handling her own children.
I was wondering about that myself.

Phonelady, I'd stay out of this. It's got all the makings of a Jerry Springer episode. Somebody is going to start throwing lamps.
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:36 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
14,785 posts, read 24,083,908 times
Reputation: 27092
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonata36 View Post
I think "what does this have to do with you?" and let your sister's business be her business.

I found it very interesting that you referred to the woman, 36, as "young woman." Maybe this is part of the problem. You and your sister refer to these near-middle-aged adults as "young", and therefore they are acting the part.

But, still, don't lose sleep over your sister's business if it has no affect on you.
Wow I find your post on the rude side , I was just wondering what everyone else thought of this . It does have effect on me because she calls me about it every day . where did you read I was losing sleep over it ? man ppl read things into posts that are not there .
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:47 PM
 
538 posts, read 1,521,889 times
Reputation: 723
Quote:
Originally Posted by phonelady61 View Post
Wow I find your post on the rude side , I was just wondering what everyone else thought of this . It does have effect on me because she calls me about it every day . where did you read I was losing sleep over it ? man ppl read things into posts that are not there .
My post is rude because I suggest that you mind your own business? It's much more rude that you post your sister's laundry on a random Internet forum.

Then deal with the part that is your problem...her calling you every day about it...tell her to stop calling you about it.
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Old 06-07-2011, 02:57 PM
 
32,516 posts, read 37,172,734 times
Reputation: 32581
Phonelady, I've known women like your sister. They never quite let go of their children. Very often they have children who can't live on their own. Just be glad neither of her children are at your door asking if they can sleep on your couch.
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Old 06-07-2011, 03:18 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
14,785 posts, read 24,083,908 times
Reputation: 27092
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Phonelady, I've known women like your sister. They never quite let go of their children. Very often they have children who can't live on their own. Just be glad neither of her children are at your door asking if they can sleep on your couch.
Oh yes I am very grateful of that LOL !!!!
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Old 06-09-2011, 01:40 AM
 
47,525 posts, read 69,692,979 times
Reputation: 22474
My guess is that your sister is afraid to be alone. She didn't have and raise kids to have them independent adults who would leave her and make their own lives. Some parents will cripple their kids, they do whatever they can to hang onto them, even so they can have their kids there to take care of them.
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