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Thanks guys.. I guess I worded my topic wrong I don't feel guilty I ment more they try and make me feel guilty about it. Like I'm doing something wrong but I'm perfectly happy with my daughter (plus we're in that two year old phase you know the one) and I don't even feel the need for another. I tkdishik because I'm still relatively young they think I should be popping them out left and right (both our grandparents had large families 5-7 kids and our parents are from large families too) but I feel like I'd rather focus on my career as well as my daughter and people seem confused by that for some reason.
I feel i can give my daughter all she needs and do wonderful things with her such as trips and sports and give her all my personal time. I'm one of 4 and I love my brothers and sister dearly but I remember my mother stretched thin and a little more mom/dad time is something I think most of us want. Anywho I think if my husband just gets the big V that'll solve the nagging from others in the family and such. Then I won't have to keep explaining anything they'll get the point!
My husband got the big V when our son was 2. We did not take it lightly. We spent a great deal of time discussing it. Don't be surprised when the Doc questions you like everyone else. Ours did, even the child death scenario. I guess for some they would consider this but in my mind, if I lost my child I wouldn't want another. No one would ever replace my son and to be honest, I am getting the heebie jeebies even talking about it. *shiver* so anyway, don't be surprised if the doc gives you a little guff and questions your decision. Its part of his or her job and some probably don't think enough about the decision and come back a few years later wanting it reversed.
My husband got the big V when our son was 2. We did not take it lightly. We spent a great deal of time discussing it. Don't be surprised when the Doc questions you like everyone else. Ours did, even the child death scenario. I guess for some they would consider this but in my mind, if I lost my child I wouldn't want another. No one would ever replace my son and to be honest, I am getting the heebie jeebies even talking about it. *shiver* so anyway, don't be surprised if the doc gives you a little guff and questions your decision. Its part of his or her job and some probably don't think enough about the decision and come back a few years later wanting it reversed.
I understand and I wouldn't have a problem with te doctor asking it like u said its his job. We have discussed it extensively and will eventually get it done but nows not the right time with both of us in school full time, full time work and our daughter.. But in the future yes its def. gonna be an option. Like you I don't even want to think of something happening to my daughter and I don't think normal people obsess over that senario every day and have other kids just in case that happens. Yikes
I'm with those who say that you're the only one who can make you feel guilty. Remember, opinions are like a$$holes....pretty much everyone has one. People can make comments to you, but it's you who allows yourself to feel guilty. Let those comments go in one ear and out the other without ever touching down!
People feel its ok to Monday morning quarterback other people's lives and those are the very same ones that are either surprised or offended when you let them know their opinion is not appreciated.
Anyone else? I mean why is it everyone elses business how many kids you want. I get constant guilt trips for it from various people. Things like oh she'll be bored going up, what if something ever happens to her you won't have another child, and its just unfair to make her be alone. I mean REALLY ... Pregnancy was unfortunatly one of the worst experiences I've ever had. Many many many health problems with it including having gestational diabetes, hyperemisis (exaggerated morning sickiness puking 8-9 times a day till i was 30 weeks pregnant) low amniotic fluid and blood pressure issues. Not only that I had to do 6 rounds of fertility drugs to get pregnant so for me enough is enough. Why do you think people are like that? Expect you to populate the world with kids for them!
They're buttholes. Tell them you'd love another one if someone else would carry them for you.
Sweetbottoms....I've know many people who've had only one child, and those children have grown up to be delightful and responsible adults....you have every reason not to want to go through another pregnancy....and you shouldn't feel that you need to explain your desician to anyone.
My parents choose to have only one child. I remember hearing oblique comments about "trying" for another as a young child. However, my parents always just said they were busy keeping up with one. They were never pushed for anything more. It's no one's business but your own YOU know your finances. YOU know how many kids you can handle. YOU know your health issues.
I had a friend from college who always wanted three kids. The economy and her family finances changed her mind and now she's happy with one. She gets comments about when she's having a second one and starting to feel the pressure. It's stupid because those people aren't going to be financially providing for the second child, or offering free babysitting. My friend will have to take care of that. I say, if someone ask, just say your family size fits your family needs. If they get pushy, you can tell them about your situation (health, finances, etc). Most people don't want to hear that spiel. Just saying it once will shut most of them up for a long time.
I wish MORE people would have fewer kids if they feel they don't want more. Why have a baby to please others? As you know, having kids is a very serious undertaking. I never question people about having just 1 or no kids. That is their choice, and frankly, I am glad they are unselfish enough NOT to cave in and have kids they don't truly, deeply desire to bring into the world. It's YOUR life, your decision, NO ONE else's.
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I guess for some they would consider this but in my mind, if I lost my child I wouldn't want another. No one would ever replace my son and to be honest, I am getting the heebie jeebies even talking about it. *shiver* so anyway, don't be surprised if the doc gives you a little guff and questions your decision. Its part of his or her job and some probably don't think enough about the decision and come back a few years later wanting it reversed.
