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^ But why? Acute anxiety is almost always part of autistic spectrum symptoms and for good reason; it's a terrifying world. Or maybe there's something else, but I hope the little guy gets some relief. Mom too.
^ But why? Acute anxiety is almost always part of autistic spectrum symptoms and for good reason; it's a terrifying world. Or maybe there's something else, but I hope the little guy gets some relief. Mom too.
Kids can experience anxiety without being on the autism spectrum.
These sound like the tantrums DD would have. At 3 she picked up a solid wood coffee table and threw it across the room trying to hit me with it. I still don't know how she had the strength. She has broken her bedroom door off of its hinges at 5. There were hundreds of tantrums in between. They have calmed a LOT in the past year. The main thing working against me getting them under control before then was DH. He just could not follow the plan.
I would send DD to her room and ignore the craziness going on in there and just as she would start winding down, DH would go in to "talk to her". No matter how many times I told him not to do it, he would do it anyway. Guess what, DD learned that if she throws a tantrum she gets one on one time with Daddy (her favoritest person in the world).
I finally got the tantrums to stop (except for the occasional, less than one per month) when DH started travelling. I am definitely the disciplinarian and use "the voice". DH had to travel for a couple of weeks back in February. A couple of days after he got home he said "wow. she has really grown up a lot since I have been gone. She hasn't had one tantrum in 2 days." That was when I told him that I had to fight hard while he was gone to stop the tantrums. I told him that I did what I had been fighting to do for the past few years and accomplished the goal in just 2 weeks. I thought he finally saw the light. A few weeks later, DD was overly tired after a birthday party and threw a tantrum. He fell back into his old habits. When he went out of town again, I fixed it. This happened a few times until he realized that life is so much more peaceful when he listens to me and follows the program. Now, if he can't handle it he is supposed to go to the store or something. Luckily, we haven't had a tantrum in a few months so I haven't had to kick him out of the house yet.
Kids can experience anxiety without being on the autism spectrum.
Of course they can, and I said so (it was a long post, I know )
But there are a lot of OTHER things pointing in the direction of autism, from the original post onward. There is also a difference between ordinary anxiety and violent frequent consuming anxiety / rage.
Unless he's been reading too much Sartre, I think this sounds like unusually high anxiety, even for his age. Being unable to express oneself or manage sensory stimuli is incredibly traumatizing for those with autism and without support maladaption is inevitable.
If it was my child I'd want to explore every likely cause and help as soon as possible
Here is the email I received today from his teacher after I emailed her to see how he is doing :
It is really hard to expect my Kindergarteners to understand all that is asked of them in the beginning of the school year. I appreciate your email very much. XXX does seem to have a more difficult time than others sitting and listening at Circle and keeping his "personal space". We are working together to understand the expectations in school and being with others in the classroom. He does seem to be very helpful pushing in chairs and picking up after others which is such a wonderful thing!
XXX has expressed to me today that he does get angry and has tantrums at home. He has not shown that behavior but seems to get sad when reprimanded in class and then gets over it. He loves to color and wants to please. With all his positives, I am keeping my eye on him and hoping that we continue to work together to have a good year.
Here is the email I received today from his teacher after I emailed her to see how he is doing :
It is really hard to expect my Kindergarteners to understand all that is asked of them in the beginning of the school year. I appreciate your email very much. XXX does seem to have a more difficult time than others sitting and listening at Circle and keeping his "personal space". We are working together to understand the expectations in school and being with others in the classroom. He does seem to be very helpful pushing in chairs and picking up after others which is such a wonderful thing!
XXX has expressed to me today that he does get angry and has tantrums at home. He has not shown that behavior but seems to get sad when reprimanded in class and then gets over it. He loves to color and wants to please. With all his positives, I am keeping my eye on him and hoping that we continue to work together to have a good year.
Here is the email I received today from his teacher after I emailed her to see how he is doing :
It is really hard to expect my Kindergarteners to understand all that is asked of them in the beginning of the school year. I appreciate your email very much. XXX does seem to have a more difficult time than others sitting and listening at Circle and keeping his "personal space". We are working together to understand the expectations in school and being with others in the classroom. He does seem to be very helpful pushing in chairs and picking up after others which is such a wonderful thing!
XXX has expressed to me today that he does get angry and has tantrums at home. He has not shown that behavior but seems to get sad when reprimanded in class and then gets over it. He loves to color and wants to please. With all his positives, I am keeping my eye on him and hoping that we continue to work together to have a good year.
The school counselor has not yet returned my call from yesterday.
I feel sad.
I am so sorry you feel sad. From the outside perspective, this is GREAT news. You can probably eliminate any emotional, mental or learning disabilities from your list of troubles! Parenting is a long enough row to hoe without adding those issues.
So now you just need to take a look at the home front, oh powerful leader of parental matters!
See, I was concerned because (yes, in addition to our parenting shortcomings) he has been to preschool and daycare, so he is not new to a classroom type setting. Circle time is not new to him.
I had contacted the school counselor just to run his behaviors by her and to ask that she let me know if any of them crop up at school. I know she would not evaluate him -- she's not qualified. Nor do I want the school to have him him evaluated -- goodness, we're not at that point.
It is difficult, and inevitable, to receive advice from one extreme to the other on the internet. "Have him evaluated ASAP" vs "gee, sounds normal for a 5 year old" certainly are at opposite ends of the spectrum. I knew this would happen, of course, as it always does (and represents one of the great things about discussion boards -- getting multiple points of view.)
His teacher does want to speak with the preschool teacher, who is also a certified K teacher. I do remember that one time the preschool teacher had him sit on a special mat at circle time, one that is technically for special needs kids (ADD? I don't know) because on the days when the class had 17 kids he had the hardest time. He did better with that mat. His class now has 18 kids.
Anyway, thanks everyone for your input, and regardless of what happens, we know we need to work on the limits and stuff, with BOTH of our kids.
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