What Parents Really Want to Tell Teachers (legally, baby, average)

[wsop]

Originally Posted by jojo61397

Here's my list:


As for some of the other points, I agree with the posters who ask the children for their side of the story, because not all teachers are forthright. In 6th grade I had a teacher, who hated me, and he made that hatred abundantly clear. There was one day I as attacked by a mob of other students (I have ADHD and sensory processing disorder), the teacher watched and laughed as I was poked and prodded by at least 20 students. Then he proceeded to discipline me instead of the other students. Each semester there was a pizza party, I sat out every pizza party, because he would find ways of taking the pizza party away. When I told my parents, they assumed I was doing something wrong, not the teacher, because teachers don't have favorite students. Later on, my mom told me that she wished she had removed me from his class, because she saw how different I was performing once I got out of his class. Because of this experience, I am suspicious of teacher's, particularly when they report something that is out of character for my children. I'm well aware that my kids may lie to get out of trouble, but I'm also well aware of the lasting psychological damage one bad teacher can have on a child. It took me until I was in high school (4-5 years) to recover from the damage this one person did to me. Teachers are supposed to above all else, protect their students. So yep, I ask my kids for their side of the story, and I probably would believe the teacher above my child, BUT if it's something out character, I will question it.

Good point! I had some teachers with questionable behavior from 7th grade through high school. I was raises by a mother who strictly believed the teacher was always right, so by the time I encountered teachers who were clearly out of line, I didn't even bother to inform my mother. For that reason, I will always listen to my child's side of the story.

As for teachers rolling their eyes when u inform them your child is gifted, all I can say is that it so disrespectful! I encountered similar experiences with some teachers with my oldest.

[Beans&Cornbread]

Originally Posted by Mattie

When did the parent-teacher combination become so adversarial?

I think the downfall of society really started escalating with the advent of the internet. It is what emerged when we opened Pandora's Box.

[somebodynew]

Originally Posted by jojo61397

Here's my list:

1. My child has autism. Having dealt with this diagnosis for a LONG time, I know his legal rights and my legal rights, and I do know the least restrictive environment, I know what should be in his IEP, and I know that I don't have to sign an IEP that I don't agree with.

If you came to my classroom with that attitude, you would be setting me up for barriers to cooperation right out of the gate. No doubt your experience with your child is extremely valuable input to the IEP process. But YOU KNOW WHAT should be in the IEP? What the heck do you need a teacher for? Why don't you teach him?

Just sayin' sometimes a little cooperation goes a long way.

3. I know my child is challenging, and maybe a brat sometimes, don't sugar coat it. Not every day is wonderful. Please don't paint my children as sunshine and roses.

Why NOT? Why wouldn't you want a cheerful, positive person? You basically want to tell the teacher exactly how to be.

4. My daughter is gifted, very gifted. When I tell you she's gifted, don't give me the eye roll and act like every parent knows their child is gifted. She's in kindergarten and doing addition, subtraction, and starting multiplication. She's a little beyond counting to 20.

That sounds like on the middle to upper end of the normal range to me.

If I had your child in the classroom, I would avoid you like the bubonic plague. Just sayin. Something to think about.

[Magritte25]

As a parent I want teachers to know:

1. I want to be involved in my child's education. Please give me opportunities to do so.

2. I value communication between us, so please keep those lines open.



That's all I have.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by somebodynew

I know this. But if you know they are going to lie, why would you put them in the spot TO lie. Why not just address the truth as you know it?

Situation:

Kid is standing in front of a puddle of milk with an upended glass in his hand.

Parent:
Did you spill the milk?

OF COURSE he did.

Or Joe the Bully smacked his arm and made him spill it.

Bullies are good at making it look like the victims fault.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by Mattie

My youngest has only been out of high school a year now. When did the parent-teacher combination become so adversarial?

I never experienced the type of issues so many now claim to be the case, and I WAS involved in the schools.

To answer the original question, why can't teachers coordinate testing days? One of the schools my kids attended did that. English tests on Monday, Science on Tues, Math on Wed, etc. Now I hear from my friends that their students have 3 tests in one day. It makes no sense.

I just don't get the issue with three tests in one day.

[somebodynew]

My list of what I would like to... oh wait have said to my kids' teachers.

I would like to work with you as part of a respectful team toward the best education of my children. If there are issues with my children, I would like to work with you to identify root causes and determine solutions. If you need my help and support developing routines and habits, please let me know. I look forward to being able to discuss any concerns I have with you.

[golfgal]

Originally Posted by Magritte25

I just don't get the issue with three tests in one day.

Me either . It's called life, get used to it. If your child is keeping up on his/her work it shouldn't be an issue at all.

[Magritte25]

Originally Posted by golfgal

Me either . It's called life, get used to it. If your child is keeping up on his/her work it shouldn't be an issue at all.

Completely agree golfgal!

[wsop]

To add to list:

Teachers, when u call to inform me of misbehavior of my child, please don't wait until the the behavior has been going on for months, and please inform me of what measures you have taken to try and rectify the behavior. Also, be aware that some behaviors I can not control from home.

My son's teacher waited until April to inform me my son left the top of his desk a mess at the end of the day every day and that he should know the routine by now. Then, dead silence on the other end.

In such situations I have learned it helps to ask further questions, such as how long has this behavior been happening, what consequences or strategies have you employed so far to rectify the behavior, and have any of them worked?

Sometimes, you'll get some surprising answers, such as this has been going on since December! It's now April!

Or, the consequence is no recess, but since so many kids have the same issue half the class would miss recess and I don't want that to happen!?

So basically, you've condoned the behavior for months but you want me to somehow fix this from home?
Teachers, don't be annoyed when I reply that I will come in every day at the end of school to teach my child how to organize his desk and have the problem rectified in a week.