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So what I can't figure from this thread is ... we CARE when some obnoxious jerk makes a rude comment or eye roll to us in public?
Yes and no... There are times when my DD notices the behavior of adults (and she is 5). So what kind of message does that send to my son, when people are rude about his behavior? One time in a restaurant, he started to meltdown, I went to leave, I was getting my coat on and as I'm walking out the door, another patron, yelled, "will somebody shut that r*tard up." Even though his communication skills are non-existent, his comprehension skills are wonderful.
Yes and no... There are times when my DD notices the behavior of adults (and she is 5). So what kind of message does that send to my son, when people are rude about his behavior? One time in a restaurant, he started to meltdown, I went to leave, I was getting my coat on and as I'm walking out the door, another patron, yelled, "will somebody shut that r*tard up." Even though his communication skills are non-existent, his comprehension skills are wonderful.
Yah I hear you. I guess a teachable moment? Oh MY, did you hear that rude man? But the older I get, the less I care what anyone else says. The messages YOU send your son are the ones that he will hear, not what some dope in a restaurant.
Yah I hear you. I guess a teachable moment? Oh MY, did you hear that rude man? But the older I get, the less I care what anyone else says. The messages YOU send your son are the ones that he will hear, not what some dope in a restaurant.
That happened to us once as well. I looked at my son and said "That right there is a perfect example of what your ABA Therapist is trying to say. I guess he didn't have one, look at how lucky you are." The guy probably had no idea what an ABA Therapist was, but by the look on his face the word therapist was all it took.
I raised 4 kids, so I think I know what I'm talking about. I would have rolled my eyes too, and I saw the same thing happen in a grocery store recently. You are training your child to manipulate you when you give in like that. It's the lazy way.
What I want to tell parents is if you take your child shopping when he is tired, hurt, hungry you will be punished for it. We've all seen the mom trying to squeeze in one last errand with a screaming kid having a meltdown. It's not the child's fault.
Also, what I want to tell parents is always speak to your child respectfully, and he will do the same. Have respect for his wishes and if you cannot comply with them, then at least acknowledge them.
I raised 4 kids, so I think I know what I'm talking about. I would have rolled my eyes too, and I saw the same thing happen in a grocery store recently. You are training your child to manipulate you when you give in like that. It's the lazy way.
What is the point of putting someone else down like that?
Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts
What I want to tell parents is if you take your child shopping when he is tired, hurt, hungry you will be punished for it. We've all seen the mom trying to squeeze in one last errand with a screaming kid having a meltdown. It's not the child's fault.
It's not always "someone's" fault either. Life is imperfect, schedules can be hectic, days can sometimes not go well.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts
Also, what I want to tell parents is always speak to your child respectfully, and he will do the same. Have respect for his wishes and if you cannot comply with them, then at least acknowledge them.
It's not always "someone's" fault either. Life is imperfect, schedules can be hectic, days can sometimes not go well.
It has nothing to do with fault. A parent of a melting child has no more right to squeak one more errand in than everyone else has a right to not listen to it, in my opinion quite the opposite. Having chosen to be a parent, you have chosen to deal with your children. Other shoppers have not.
And if you choose to give in this one time, you can bet your sweet bippy that he will know he has you over a barrel next time as well.
It has nothing to do with fault. A parent of a melting child has no more right to squeak one more errand in than everyone else has a right to not listen to it, in my opinion quite the opposite. Having chosen to be a parent, you have chosen to deal with your children. Other shoppers have not.
And if you choose to give in this one time, you can bet your sweet bippy that he will know he has you over a barrel next time as well.
Eh, like I said, sometimes things just have to be done. I have no idea when some people started thinking they had a right to a quiet, peaceful night at the local Wegman's safe from the bothers of society, but it's quite annoying.
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