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Ihave a daughter that is 13 yrs old and me and the mother have been broken up since she was 3 yrs old. We were together for 3 yrs while I took care of her and my daughter while I was in the Navy. Well when we broke up I moved out. At that time I was picking my daughter up and taking her to school for 7; I had class at 7:45am that morning. One morning I went to pick her to take her, she wasn't dressed or anything so I confronted my ex and asked her why isn't she dressed because I had to take her to school and didn't want to be late. She was out the night before stripping and her excuse was because she got in late. Well told her that wasn't an excuse to not have her dressed, and she told me to leave and that I couldn't see my daughter ever again. Well before then, mind you she was having some guy just hanging out at the house that she said was just "friends" and at that time we were working on getting back together but it never happened because of what I mentioned. Now her and that same guy are married and have been now for years and have a son together. Fine...thats not my issue. But let me tell you the rest. Time passed to where she would let me pick her up a few times. As time went on, I eventually moved an hour away to another city. She then wouldn't let me pick her up anymore because she said that I sexually abused my daughter. Which was sooo sick of her to even accuse me of doing. That was her excuse for her to not let me see her. I tried calling until she eventually moved and changed her address and number. My momma was the only one that can pick her up and see her and my own momma would believe her story over mine about the abuse. But anyway years passed of me not seeing her on my own. The only way I could see her was at her school that I find out through my sister. But it was a regular of me to always go and see how she's doing at school...nothing new. But I would write and everything to try to find out. I had no money and I wasn't making my child support regular but it was constant. So 8 years passed before I could get a really good friend of mine that I met to represent me pro bono. I finally got my rights like I wanted BUT throughout time up unitl now she has been a total ahole. Since the first time I got my order, we started out ok. The court order says to pick her up for 6:30pm and she would tell me if I'm late then I can't pick her, and this is with me telling her way in advance that I'm going to be late because of work. Now the visitation starts at 6:30 but doesn't mean at that time, it's up to the parents to sort that out if either part is willing. But she's evidently making it very difficult because she doesn't want me in my duaghter's life for one cause she asked me on one occasion if I wanted to give up my rights and I told her no. She tried to bribe me and say that I won't have to pay child support and I still didn't care...I wanted my daughter. Then once we get into court she asks the judge, "can he just give up his rights?". The judge told her that she would have to take that up with me. Of course its a no!.So she has my daughter calling her husband daddy while she tells her to call me by my first name. Thats total disrespect of her to do to me. I never say anything bad about her mom in front of her but she does it about me. I can tell that she does because the way my daughter acts around me. But her attorney imposed that my daughter couldn't stay the night with me if I had another female around while I'm not married. My friend, whose my attorney, thought that was bs because now a days you'll have a couple live together while not married. That was an old law that he pulled up to be anal. SO, I would like to know what can I impose on her or restrict her from doing that'll make her drop that restriction on me. Because I have to take her back to court...again for the same thing and this I want to be all prepared. Sorry for being so long but I had to make y'all understnd where I was coming from. Thanks!
I'm not sure why you think we could offer more help than your attorney friend can. We are not qualified to give legal advice, and that is what you need.
Are you asking how to get your ex to agree to allowing you to have overnights with a female while your daughter is in your care?
Short answer, you have to go back through court to have the order amended.
The truth is, it doesn't matter what the child's mother has or hasn't done. The court will not care about her stripping 8-9 years ago. What the judge will look at is YOUR actions to improve your relationship with your daughter. I read your post.... in the whole thing you bash the momma and talk about your rights.... what about your daughter? How is she handling regular visitation? How would she feel to have to share you with another woman so soon after regular visitation has resumed after 8 years?
Last edited by rockinmomma; 10-17-2011 at 02:02 PM..
Reason: typo
Yes, I think you should just skip the overnights with whatever female for now and just work on your father-daughter relationship and enjoy what time you have with your child. Since you don't have main custody, just have the women spend nights when your daughter isn't there.
You didn't say whether your visitations are weekly or bi-weekly.
Are you foolish enough to believe a women who made sexual abuse allegations against you as a means to keep you out of the childs life, wasn't going to be a problem to you in the future?
Futhermore, I'd be rather cautious if I were you. This women is capable of pulling your name thru the mud to keep you from ever seeing your child if she wishes.
I would let the attorney know everything thats transpired in the past and if visitation is an issue take that up with him/her as well.
You didn't say whether your visitations are weekly or bi-weekly.
Are you foolish enough to believe a women who made sexual abuse allegations against you as a means to keep you out of the childs life, wasn't going to be a problem to you in the future?
Futhermore, I'd be rather cautious if I were you. This women is capable of pulling your name thru the mud to keep you from ever seeing your child if she wishes.
I would let the attorney know everything thats transpired in the past and if visitation is an issue take that up with him/her as well.
Give that this guy posted once and never posted again, and the nature of his post, i think this was someone posting to get a reaction out of people is all.
All of y'all. You say that I'm bashing her? Yes. I am. Because I know this person through and through. You only know what I tell you in this post and quite frankly, I left out a lot of things. I surely cae about my duaghter's well being as I mentioned in my previous post. I don't bash her mom in front of her. She does it to her about me. And my attorney friend knows EVERYTHING. I'm only trying to LEGALLY make her lift that restriction. And you can do that by placing a restriction on her that she won't like. What it is? I don't know. I was hoping someone went through something similar and had advice. And this person has went against the court order over and over. So yes I am bashing this woman because SHE'S the one that doesn't care about our daughter's feelings in this. If someone is intentionally keeping a child away from their noncustodial parent, then that person is selfish and in considerate. And to let you know, the court does care about stripping 8-9 yrs of my visitation rights because it would look to them as she doesn't care about the court order or the child in this matter. That's like me not paying child support for those amount of years. I will be violating the court order as would she. But I would be called a dead beat and she would be called...a mother. Funny...this judicial system and the people that think they know it or bias.
You didn't say whether your visitations are weekly or bi-weekly.
Are you foolish enough to believe a women who made sexual abuse allegations against you as a means to keep you out of the childs life, wasn't going to be a problem to you in the future?
Futhermore, I'd be rather cautious if I were you. This women is capable of pulling your name thru the mud to keep you from ever seeing your child if she wishes.
I would let the attorney know everything thats transpired in the past and if visitation is an issue take that up with him/her as well.
It's bi-weekly...
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