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Recently, I went out to dinner with a friend, and an acquaintance of hers. I brought my dd with us. It was a restaurant/bar, where we had dinner and drinks. I ordered myself an amaretto sour and my dd a kiddie cocktail, not thinking anything of it. When out to dinner like this and ordering myself a drink, I have always ordered her a kiddie cocktail--to keep her from wanting to drink out my glass, and because it's a fun little drink in her own glass with a stirrer and cherry, just like mine.
My friend's friend said something like kiddie cocktails teach kids to drink alcohol, and make them think alcohol is the same as juice. I was like, it's not alcohol, it's 7 up and grenadine with a cherry. She brought up candy cigarettes, how they took them off the market because it was a bad influence for kids, and she thinks the same of kiddie cocktails. My friend said she didn't think it was a big deal. I didn't either, but I kind of second guessed myself after that.
I drink occasionally, mostly recreational, but I'm not a heavy drinker, or an every day drinker. I get together with friends or my sisters and have wine or a couple of mixed drinks, but that's about it. I never thought it was a big deal to have alcohol in my house, or for my dd to see me drinking it. She knows that some drinks are not for kids, and she has never seen me drunk, or even tipsy. There isn't an issue of alcoholism in my family. I never thought a thing about it until that lady said that, and I sat there watching my dd sipping her cocktail with us grown folks.
Shirley Temples were a big treat for birthday dinners when I was younger. It made me feel so grown up!
If the term "cocktail" worries you, just call it a Shirley Temple. There's no reason to compare it to an alcoholic drink.
I don't see the issue at all. Having a Shirley Temple won't make your child an alcoholic anymore than having candy cigarettes will make them a smoker or having a doctors playset with a fake needle will turn them into a junkie.
She is going to learn her views on alcohol and responsible consumption from you and what you teach her about it. Heck having a "kiddie cocktail" may even help you have that conversation.
My friend's friend said something like kiddie cocktails teach kids to drink alcohol, and make them think alcohol is the same as juice.
That's the dumbest thing I've heard this week. Why are [some]* parents so uptight about such little things these days? Next they'll be trying to ban water because it looks like vodka.
My friend's friend said something like kiddie cocktails teach kids to drink alcohol, and make them think alcohol is the same as juice. I was like, it's not alcohol, it's 7 up and grenadine with a cherry. She brought up candy cigarettes, how they took them off the market because it was a bad influence for kids, and she thinks the same of kiddie cocktails.
So just wondering, what's your take on this?
I think just the opposite. The more a thing is taboo or mysterious, the more likely kids will be to want to try it. Kids will try many things because of peer pressure, smoking, drinking and even sex. If they are educated and exposed to such things as being normal adult activities and the cool factor is taken out of the equation the less likely they will be to feel any pressure to adult things.
I think just the opposite. The more a thing is taboo or mysterious, the more likely kids will be to want to try it. Kids will try many things because of peer pressure, smoking, drinking and even sex. If they are educated and exposed to such things as being normal adult activities and the cool factor is taken out of the equation the less likely they will be to feel any pressure to adult things.
I agree, take the "mystery" out of it. They are pretending to be adult, and adults sometimes enjoy a fruity cocktail on occasions, so they are modeling social drinking, which is totally appropriate. I would think that sending a message to hide your drinking, excusing it, or that it is "bad", would be more detrimental.
I think I had my first Shirley Temple when I was four. I thought it was just fabulous to sit in a nice restaurant and be treated to something special. I've also consumed many packs of candy cigarettes. (Which, yes, I would pretend to smoke including flicking off the "ashes" into the ashtray in the car.)
Even with all that corruption I didn't drink alcohol until I was well into my twenties and I've never smoked. BTW my dad, who didn't smoke or drink for religious reasons, had zero problem with us having the fake drinks and smokes. He knew we were in it for the sugar and the adventure of feeling like a grown-up.
Better to worry about what a small child has in their everyday diet, IMHO.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 11-09-2011 at 11:45 AM..
I remember fondly having a Shirley Temple a few times as a child. It would have been at an upscale restaurant though and not just any one that served alcohol.
With my ex husband, beer was a given for him at any place that served it and on rare occasion I'd have a glass of wine, but we never had any other type of drink around our girls, so it never really came up as a possibility to offer them anything similar.
My current husband and I don't drink so no reason to consider that now either, although we do buy bubbling grape/apple juice to share with them on New Years.
However, I do not see anything wrong with anyone ordering a Shirley Temple for a child while they are enjoying their own cocktail.
I would not let it worry me in the least and that woman needs to mind her own business . How you are raising your daughter is none of her business . I would never have lunch with her again and I would tell my other friend" if you invite her again please let me know cause you will have lunch with her without me there ." Wow some people have alot of nerve giving their opinions when it is not even asked for . No seeing your parents drink will not turn a kid into an alchoholic .
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