Why are kids so messed up these days? (19 years old, natural, learn)
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So what are YOU doing to change things for YOUR child?
Ever think of turning off the TV for starters?
It's hard to turn off TV for all the kids surrounding my son. Kids being kids try to fit in with their peer, to be accepted. Certainly, knowing nothing about spider-man, for example, doesn't help. Forbidden fruits taste the best too. And if not spider-man then what? Sad truth, there is no viable alternative to the messages delivered by the professional media, public education and PR. As much as I dislike the rat race and all associated personality "adjustments", what are the alternatives? Trailer parks and self-inflicted poverty don't really free you from all the traps and anxieties of the modern world. Whether I like it or not, my son will live in very restrictive society and fueling his independence, decency, non conformity and free thinking will not improve his chances for decent life (at least materially speaking), neither it will make him "happier" and connected (at least superficially). It's not like there is alternative "life style" to aspire for. For example, if my son (by miracle) will get used to explore open spaces on his own and entertain himself, don't you think he will be suffocated by your average small town USA? At least caged kids don't know what they are missing, it's easier to flip TV on, open a beer and life is good. Same with popular culture. If you completely tune it out, you feel immediate sense of alienation, "Matrix" effect will be the next. It's OK if I inflict it upon myself, but what about kids who need their network of very superficial "friends", if you tune out the buzz, you decimate your kid's socializing options. I don't want to raise a loner, superficial connections are better than none.
Besides, when I typed "TV" I didn't mean just TV, "TV" stands for all kinds of mass communication & institutions bombarding us with "news", buzz, behavioral messages and stereotypes. Personally, I don't watch TV at all, I cannot stand internet news "buzz" sites either, yet somehow I'm quite aware of the latest buzz. I didn't own TV in 2005 but the word "Aruba" stuck in my mind seems forever. You just can't isolate yourself from all the noise.
So basically there are two damning options:
1) To buy into behavioral messages delivered by media and institutions.
2) Not to buy into behavioral messages yet act as though you 110% converted
To be a true believer or conforming nonconformist?
Lol. I'm a Boomer. We do our own thing and refuse to give into to The Man or The Media. (Which is the message.)
I imaging GOAT is having a good laugh right now.
BTW: I was raised by two VERY strong members of the Greatest Generation who taught me if I didn't like it, I should change it. Cardinal sin to complain about something then do nothing about it.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 01-27-2012 at 03:12 PM..
Lol. I'm a Boomer. We do our own thing and refuse to give into to The Man or The Media. (Which is the message.)
I imaging GOAT is having a good laugh right now.
Multiple studies confirmed multiple times the sad fact that "Man of The Media" affects behavior and consumption patterns of the most ostentatious "non-confirming" crowds out there. Marketing and PR would not be a trillion sized industry otherwise.
It's hard to turn off TV for all the kids surrounding my son. Kids being kids try to fit in with their peer, to be accepted. Certainly, knowing nothing about spider-man, for example, doesn't help. Forbidden fruits taste the best too. And if not spider-man then what? Sad truth, there is no viable alternative to the messages delivered by the professional media, public education and PR. As much as I dislike the rat race and all associated personality "adjustments", what are the alternatives? Trailer parks and self-inflicted poverty don't really free you from all the traps and anxieties of the modern world. Whether I like it or not, my son will live in very restrictive society and fueling his independence, decency, non conformity and free thinking will not improve his chances for decent life (at least materially speaking), neither it will make him "happier" and connected (at least superficially). It's not like there is alternative "life style" to aspire for. For example, if my son (by miracle) will get used to explore open spaces on his own and entertain himself, don't you think he will be suffocated by your average small town USA? At least caged kids don't know what they are missing, it's easier to flip TV on, open a beer and life is good. Same with popular culture. If you completely tune it out, you feel immediate sense of alienation, "Matrix" effect will be the next. It's OK if I inflict it upon myself, but what about kids who need their network of very superficial "friends", if you tune out the buzz, you decimate your kid's socializing options. I don't want to raise a loner, superficial connections are better than none.
Besides, when I typed "TV" I didn't mean just TV, "TV" stands for all kinds of mass communication & institutions bombarding us with "news", buzz, behavioral messages and stereotypes. Personally, I don't watch TV at all, I cannot stand internet news "buzz" sites either, yet somehow I'm quite aware of the latest buzz. I didn't own TV in 2005 but the word "Aruba" stuck in my mind seems forever. You just can't isolate yourself from all the noise.
So basically there are two damning options:
1) To buy into behavioral messages delivered by media and institutions.
2) Not to buy into behavioral messages yet act as though you 110% converted
To be a true believer or conforming nonconformist?
What would you choose?
Let me see if I understand correctly. You are lamenting the fact that parents are not setting boundaries, and yet you are not setting boundaries either with regard to the media?
Multiple studies confirmed multiple times the sad fact that "Man of The Media" affects behavior and consumption patterns of the most ostentatious "non-confirming" crowds out there. Marketing and PR would not be a trillion sized industry otherwise.
Please give me some credit. My generation WROTE those studies.
I don't think kids have changed. Its their parents. Parents are afraid their kids will hate them. No child has ever died because their mother told them no. I hated my parents at times. But as I aquired experience, I saw the light.
Let me see if I understand correctly. You are lamenting the fact that parents are not setting boundaries, and yet you are not setting boundaries either with regard to the media?
Parents are not setting anything, yet we are being blamed for .... for ....everything, most of all we are blamed for the kids not being "molded" up to the high standards (of not our making). Theory goes that if every kid would be molded according to the exact specifications we would have a trouble-less upper middle class only society whose members are racing up the ladder in between schmoozings and consuming finer things in life. The fact that we don't have exclusively upper middle class society just "confirms" that intensity of the child "molding" is not sufficient. We need more of schooling and indoctrination, we need more psychiatric drugs & shrinks, we need more cops to handcuff 6 year olds and to lock up the parents, we need more .... and then nirvana.
Seriously, society that prescribes strong psychiatric drugs to sedate 6+ millions of its children (to ensure the proper "molding" environment), society that handcuff 6 years olds to instill fear into youngings is screwed up to its core basics.
It's unbelievable what humans would do to their kids to mold them. The fact that most of the modern parents don't do "molding" themselves is even more troubling. We gave up our kids to "the best school districts" and TV gurus to mold them in an exchange for the promise of them (kids) climbing the ladder more successfully. We destroyed natural childhood all in the name of our status anxiety. Yet we demand "respect" from the kids. How ironic is that?
Superficially, modern kids don't have it that bad, but in some aspects they have it the worst human kind ever had.
I don't think kids have changed. Its their parents. Parents are afraid their kids will hate them. No child has ever died because their mother told them no. I hated my parents at times. But as I aquired experience, I saw the light.
Interestingly, I see kids who were told no still growing up with a sense of entitlement because they see what their friends get. My kids think they are deprived because they don't have smart phones with internet access. WHY does a 14 yo need a smart phone with internet access?
You say kids are messed up? Here is an old compilation of the things kids should be grateful for. Sometimes I think that public education is the most Orwellian institution in the human history, theater of absurd rests. The art of doublespeak spreads around all social institution like fire, US government, corporations, military & public education are among the most affected by doublespeak. How would you raise your kid to function in the doublespeak society? Would you raise your kids to take seriously outrageous BS coming from the mouths of principals and police "justifying" ridiculous expulsions and arrests? If you say, NO, would you teach your kid to keep his mouth shut not be be "singled out" for psychotropic drugs, expulsions and "counseling"? If your sane kid will manage to pass undetected by the "educators", corporate environment will be far less forgiving. Would you teach your kid to converse in "corporatese" freely without bursting into laughter each time? It takes some serious mental conditioning to achieve that level of "enlightenment".
Police are now handcuffing children in kindergarten and using tasers on 6-year-olds.Monday, March 14, 2005, a five-year-old black girl was handcuffed by police in her kindergarten room in South Pinellas, Florida. She had been in a tantrum, swinging her fists at Assistant Principal Nicole Dibenedetto and others. The child climbed up on a table four times and was being as violent and destructive as a 5-year-old girl knew how to be. Ms. Dibenedetto used all the latest psychobabble from a Pinellas school district training course called Crisis Prevention Intervention in a vain attempt to calm the child (certainly a wasteful expenditure of taxpayers money).
Florida appears to be particularly egregious in its use of police tactics against minors:
Police used a taser gun on a 6-year-old in Kelsey Pharr Elementary in Miami, Florida in November, 2004
The previous month, October 2004, 8-year-old Isaac Sutton got in a fight with another child, was cuffed and taken to juvenile detention in Tallahassee, Florida. His mother, Pamela Kelley, later went public with the story. (The young boy’s attorney, Kathy Garner, said he just needed a good talking to.)
The month before that, 7-year-old Johnny Lee Morris was arrested at Jefferson Elementary School in Monticello, Florida, where he was handcuffed and taken to a juvenile detention center.
Kyle Fredrickson, 12, was arrested, cuffed, and taken to jail in Inverness, Florida, for stomping in a puddle to splash water on his classmates.
And unfortunately, these heavy-handed measures are not confined to the Sunshine State.
Porsche Brown, a ten-year-old girl, was arrested at her elementary school in Philadelphia, and taken to the police station in a patrol wagon. She had brought a pair of scissors from home, and according to state law, the scissors constituted a potential weapon. The girl’s mother, Rose Jackson, was outraged. “My daughter cried and cried,” said her mother, Rose Jackson. “She had no idea what she did was wrong.” Philadelphia public schools systems are notorious for ill-behaved students, but ten-year-olds bearing scissors now captivate police attention.
April 4, 2002, a sixth grader in Madison, Wisconsin, was suspended from school for bringing a serrated table knife to school to dissect an onion for a science project. Christian Schmidt, a 12-year-old, was a straight-A student at Cherokee Middle School. His father, Larry Jorgenson asked, “Does ‘no tolerance’ also mean ‘no common sense’?” Superintendent Valencia Douglass retorted, “The only way to ensure the safety of all students is to bar all weapons from campus.” Administrators told the family in a letter that they'll recommend a one-year expulsion for “possession of a dangerous weapon” to the school board. However, Jorgenson said the district told the family unofficially that if Christian admits he committed a “crime,” submits to a psychological evaluation, and completes an anger management course, he would be eligible to return to school this year.
Last edited by RememberMee; 01-27-2012 at 04:46 PM..
It's hard to turn off TV for all the kids surrounding my son. Kids being kids try to fit in with their peer, to be accepted. Certainly, knowing nothing about spider-man, for example, doesn't help. Forbidden fruits taste the best too. And if not spider-man then what? Sad truth, there is no viable alternative to the messages delivered by the professional media, public education and PR. As much as I dislike the rat race and all associated personality "adjustments", what are the alternatives? Trailer parks and self-inflicted poverty don't really free you from all the traps and anxieties of the modern world. Whether I like it or not, my son will live in very restrictive society and fueling his independence, decency, non conformity and free thinking will not improve his chances for decent life (at least materially speaking), neither it will make him "happier" and connected (at least superficially). It's not like there is alternative "life style" to aspire for. For example, if my son (by miracle) will get used to explore open spaces on his own and entertain himself, don't you think he will be suffocated by your average small town USA? At least caged kids don't know what they are missing, it's easier to flip TV on, open a beer and life is good. Same with popular culture. If you completely tune it out, you feel immediate sense of alienation, "Matrix" effect will be the next. It's OK if I inflict it upon myself, but what about kids who need their network of very superficial "friends", if you tune out the buzz, you decimate your kid's socializing options. I don't want to raise a loner, superficial connections are better than none.
Besides, when I typed "TV" I didn't mean just TV, "TV" stands for all kinds of mass communication & institutions bombarding us with "news", buzz, behavioral messages and stereotypes. Personally, I don't watch TV at all, I cannot stand internet news "buzz" sites either, yet somehow I'm quite aware of the latest buzz. I didn't own TV in 2005 but the word "Aruba" stuck in my mind seems forever. You just can't isolate yourself from all the noise.
So basically there are two damning options:
1) To buy into behavioral messages delivered by media and institutions.
2) Not to buy into behavioral messages yet act as though you 110% converted
To be a true believer or conforming nonconformist?
What would you choose?
So limit TV, don't turn it off completely. Allow internet access only after homework is done. Use parental controls, and set time limits. It's called "parenting". You speak as if you have no control over these things.
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WHY does a 14 yo need a smart phone with internet access?
