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That's what land lines are for. Did you suspect this family would have prevented your child from using the telephone?
So mom and dad tie one on, or they are the type that like to walk around with little clothing on, or maybe dad has a little problem keeping his hands to himself.
THink this doesn't happen? You are wrong.
My sister recently banned her 13 year old from sleepovers at a friend's house because mom routinely shows up for carpool pickups a little tipsy. When the girls' families went away together for a competition last year, the mom was giving a BJ to her husband on the train in the middle of the night. Well, no one sleeps great on a train so everyone knew what was going on.
These people do this stuff in public - imagine what they do in their own home??? ANd a 9 year old is supposed to ask to use a land line to ask to go home??? What about people who don't have a land line - you have to ask the host parents to use THEIR cell phone and when they ask why....a 9 year old is supposed to come up with a story???
I read a story years ago about a man who was using his daughter's sleepovers to victimize young girls (he was victimizing his daughters as well). Here's where it gets sick - he was a convicted child molester and his wife met him while he was in jail, I think she was a nurse in the jail. SHe knew exactly what he was doing. Supposedly he had been "chemically castrated".
Yeah, I think there are certain times where it's OK to say "we aren't going to follow these rules - just be careful and don't get caught". People have every right to the rules in their house. That doesn't mean you have to let your kids go there. Now the OP knows the score and she's free to encourage her DD to make other friends.
So mom and dad tie one on, or they are the type that like to walk around with little clothing on, or maybe dad has a little problem keeping his hands to himself.
THink this doesn't happen? You are wrong.
My sister recently banned her 13 year old from sleepovers at a friend's house because mom routinely shows up for carpool pickups a little tipsy. When the girls' families went away together for a competition last year, the mom was giving a BJ to her husband on the train in the middle of the night. Well, no one sleeps great on a train so everyone knew what was going on.
These people do this stuff in public - imagine what they do in their own home??? ANd a 9 year old is supposed to ask to use a land line to ask to go home??? What about people who don't have a land line - you have to ask the host parents to use THEIR cell phone and when they ask why....a 9 year old is supposed to come up with a story???
I read a story years ago about a man who was using his daughter's sleepovers to victimize young girls (he was victimizing his daughters as well). Here's where it gets sick - he was a convicted child molester and his wife met him while he was in jail, I think she was a nurse in the jail. SHe knew exactly what he was doing. Supposedly he had been "chemically castrated".
Yeah, I think there are certain times where it's OK to say "we aren't going to follow these rules - just be careful and don't get caught". People have every right to the rules in their house. That doesn't mean you have to let your kids go there. Now the OP knows the score and she's free to encourage her DD to make other friends.
Honestly, in this type of situation, I would never consent to my child sleeping over, so whether or not she had a cell phone on her would be a moot point.
I think people are taking issue not with mom wanting her DD to have the phone, but that she didn't just speak to the host mom beforehand and explain why she wanted DD to have it. I can't imagine a reasonable host mom not understanding mom was anxious about her daughter's first sleepover. I believe the reaction on the thread is to the "I can do whatever I want" when it could have been easily addressed in advance without all of the brouhaha.
Honestly, in this type of situation, I would never consent to my child sleeping over, so whether or not she had a cell phone on her would be a moot point.
I think people are taking issue not with mom wanting her DD to have the phone, but that she didn't just speak to the host mom beforehand and explain why she wanted DD to have it. I can't imagine a reasonable host mom not understanding mom was anxious about her daughter's first sleepover. I believe the reaction on the thread is to the "I can do whatever I want" when it could have been easily addressed in advance without all of the brouhaha.
So mom and dad tie one on, or they are the type that like to walk around with little clothing on, or maybe dad has a little problem keeping his hands to himself.
THink this doesn't happen? You are wrong.
My sister recently banned her 13 year old from sleepovers at a friend's house because mom routinely shows up for carpool pickups a little tipsy. When the girls' families went away together for a competition last year, the mom was giving a BJ to her husband on the train in the middle of the night. Well, no one sleeps great on a train so everyone knew what was going on.
These people do this stuff in public - imagine what they do in their own home??? ANd a 9 year old is supposed to ask to use a land line to ask to go home??? What about people who don't have a land line - you have to ask the host parents to use THEIR cell phone and when they ask why....a 9 year old is supposed to come up with a story???
I read a story years ago about a man who was using his daughter's sleepovers to victimize young girls (he was victimizing his daughters as well). Here's where it gets sick - he was a convicted child molester and his wife met him while he was in jail, I think she was a nurse in the jail. SHe knew exactly what he was doing. Supposedly he had been "chemically castrated".
Yeah, I think there are certain times where it's OK to say "we aren't going to follow these rules - just be careful and don't get caught". People have every right to the rules in their house. That doesn't mean you have to let your kids go there. Now the OP knows the score and she's free to encourage her DD to make other friends.
If you seriously think any of these things are going to happen, then don't send your child. Frankly, we always knew the parents of my kids friends well and hung out with them. We were often socializing with the adults in backyard barbecues and house parties.
I would not send my kids to a sleepover where I did not know the parents and expect them to supervise the kids and not to victimize the kids. The paranoia of parents today is simply over the top.
I think it depends. What is it that concerns you most about sleepovers? Knowing a parent well doesn't necessarily mean you have any idea what really goes on in their home.
LOL, that would be the exact reason why my child will not sleep over someones house. But for those who do allow it, I don't understand not starting with at least that bit of information
If you seriously think any of these things are going to happen, then don't send your child. .
My point is - you and everyone else who responded in the same vein seem to think these people are walking around with some sort of sign on their head. If it were that easy to identify child molesters and other unsavory types that you don't want your kids sleeping over with, no child would ever be abused. Hello, Jerry Sandusky? He was caught because a mother noticed a change in her son's behavior and contacted the high school that Sandusky volunteered at....it was that HS administrator that turned him in!!!
Obviously if you see things going on that you are not comfy with, you keep your kids away from those houses. I do that. The problem is - you can't always tell. How many times do we see people saying in the media about a friend or neighbor "I just can't believe they would do something like that".
So know one thinks there can be reasons other than a desire to molest your child that a parent wouldn't want children to have cell phones at a sleepover? And if an adult were hosting a sleepover for the sole purpose of victimizing children, do you really think a cell phone is going to change what happens?
My point is - you and everyone else who responded in the same vein seem to think these people are walking around with some sort of sign on their head. If it were that easy to identify child molesters and other unsavory types that you don't want your kids sleeping over with, no child would ever be abused. Hello, Jerry Sandusky? He was caught because a mother noticed a change in her son's behavior and contacted the high school that Sandusky volunteered at....it was that HS administrator that turned him in!!!
Obviously if you see things going on that you are not comfy with, you keep your kids away from those houses. I do that. The problem is - you can't always tell. How many times do we see people saying in the media about a friend or neighbor "I just can't believe they would do something like that".
The thing is that this is *rare.* I don't want to be scared to live or teach my children to be scared to live.
We wrap our kids in bubble wrap nowadays. Do bad things happen? Sometimes, but it is very rare. I really agree with what this fellow says about raising resilient kids. We have to allow kids to experience life.
For a teenager, that might mean being allowed to attend a rock concert with some friends, or for a younger child, visiting a relative in another city.
When Michael’s son, Scott, was 14, he wanted to go to a party and then walk home with his friends at midnight. Instead of immediately saying “No!” Michael instead asked him to assess the danger of such a scenario. He asked his son if he knew the neighborhood and what he would do if he encountered danger.
“He didn’t have a plan. I told him that this isn’t smart and doesn’t seem like a manageable amount of risk for you. I didn’t say ‘No, don’t go to the party’. I gave him $20 and told him to take a cab home at midnight or call me and I would pick him up.
So know one thinks there can be reasons other than a desire to molest your child that a parent wouldn't want children to have cell phones at a sleepover? And if an adult were hosting a sleepover for the sole purpose of victimizing children, do you really think a cell phone is going to change what happens?
"The last time we had a sleepover, some of the girls texted and played with their phones instead of joining in the party, and there were some hurt feelings. We're asking the girls to leave their phones at home" sounds much more likely and reasonable to me.
If another kid's parent said, "Please leave the DS at home," would anyone object?
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