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When our kids were between 4-8/9 we had kiddie parties out of the house just for kids. We never served alcohol at the bowling alley or laser tag place.
When the kids were small the parties were at home, with friends and family and everyone knew us so I guess it was never an issue. Once the kids were over 10 their parties also tended to be their very close friends, and we always knew the parents. These were people we socialized with on a regular basis so it would never have been an issue.
When my kids were small I would stay if I didn't know the parents well but that was not alcohol related. If I knew the parents and was comfortable leaving my kids then I did even if the parents were having a beer. None of my kids friends have parents that drink a lot. I do know people who drink a lot and if some of them were hosting a party I would definitely want to keep a close eye on my child.
I don't think that alcohol is really the issue though. Some people do not supervise their kids closely enough. Most of those people do not supervise them whether they are drinking or not so alcohol is not really an issue in my mind. When my kids were small I stayed at parties if I didn't know the parents. If they served beer I had some, if they didn't then I didn't.
Alcohol is not a big issue in my life. If someone is serving it, fine. If not, that's fine also.
Sorry, I guess the question can go in so many different directions, it's hard to tell just what someone's responding to or objecting to. Yes, I would leave too if it was a kid's party and the kids were the primary focus. My experience with throwing a child's birthday party is that the host is so busy organizing, serving cake and punch, corralling kids, directing games, passing out party favors,etc. that the thought of sitting down having a beer is laughable. Heck, you don't even get a piece of cake until the party is over and if there's any left over. If the host serves beer to other parents that are there, I wouldn't care. If we're just talking about beer and wine, I think the party would have to be longer than a couple hours for it to turn into a drunken brawl. But it's hard to imagine a parent who is in charge of the party sitting back with a beer.
If I did go to drop my dd off at a birthday party, and found the host lounging with adult guests with a beer in hand, I would stay. In that case, it would seem that the kids are just running around doing their own thing while the adults socialize, and I would stay to keep an eye on my own child.
Yeah, that's what I meant. I guess I went overboard, didn't mean to. Same thing as what you've stated. It just doesn't make it clear how much attention they will spend monitoring the kids, but like others said it's a lot of things.
That's just a sign to me I'd better stick around a bit and see for myself. I am influenced by my experience though, with my friends, I admit that. We changed a lot when we had kids. Some grew up but some didn't. Some I wouldn't leave my kids with BECAUSE I KNOW THEM. If you know what I mean.
? Or when your favorite song comes on on the radio? Or when you start worrying if youSo there is a change in you after 2 Coca-Colas locked the door when you left the house?
The real question is, is the change really that big a deal?
The answer is, no.
And PoppySead, you are more trusting than I, because I wouldn't just drop my kid off at ANYONE'S house if I didn't know them that well, whether they were drinking alcohol or not.
No matter how you word it, the change in a person with alcohol in their system is not the same as the examples you gave. While most people won't notice a difference in having a couple of beers, some do. So the change may be a big deal to some.
This whole thread reminds me of when I was growing up in the '70s. All my parents' friends drank, many smoked. Our birthday parties were small, quick, and not a huge deal. We also never had a 'party' after age 10- we might invite a friend to a movie, or have a sleepover.
My parents and their friends all drank around us, in fact, we used to tend bar. Somehow we all ended up just fine, and infinitely better adjusted than most of the kids I see now.
When we had kids parties, often I had kids dropped off who I did not even know. Let alone did I know their parents. I would never drink if I was responsible for watching someone else's child. I would hope parents who are responsible feel the same.
When we had kids parties, often I had kids dropped off who I did not even know. Let alone did I know their parents. I would never drink if I was responsible for watching someone else's child. I would hope parents who are responsible feel the same.
Yes, I'm sure we have all been in that situation. And as has been stated NUMEROUS times already in this very thread, those are not the parties under discussion.
Your child is still very small, right? Two or so? You're not in birthday party realm yet. I think if you polled the parents of children who are at least elementary-school-aged, you'd find there are a lot of invitations to and from classmates with parents you've met once or twice, if that.
Doesn't change a thing. I won't be just dropping my kid off at someone's house unless I know them (even when he's in elementary school). That's just asking for trouble, imo.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajzjmsmom
No matter how you word it, the change in a person with alcohol in their system is not the same as the examples you gave. While most people won't notice a difference in having a couple of beers, some do. So the change may be a big deal to some.
With two reasonable drinks? And by "not the same", you mean "not as harmless", yes? Prove it. And I could say the same for caffeine and general thoughts of worry - they affect some people more than others.
Exactly ... I know people who have a cup of coffee and turn into jittery messes that can't focus ...... However they isn't the reality for most of us and people generally know how they react
yesterday I had a coffee in the morning then a soda at night so basically I was doing drugs all day .....
Exactly ... I know people who have a cup of coffee and turn into jittery messes that can't focus ...... However they isn't the reality for most of us and people generally know how they react
yesterday I had a coffee in the morning then a soda at night so basically I was doing drugs all day .....
Some of the hyperbole here is a bit absurd
No kidding! And let's not forget that while one parent is judging another for having a single beer, the first parent's kid is wolfing down who knows how much sugar and caffeine But it's okay, because "The party is for the kids" aka "No one's supposed to consume anything that can harm their health and make them act differently except for the children".
No kidding! And let's not forget that while one parent is judging another for having a single beer, the first parent's kid is wolfing down who knows how much sugar and caffeine But it's okay, because "The party is for the kids" aka "No one's supposed to consume anything that can harm their health and make them act differently except for the children".
If we could get past people being defensive about their drinking habits then we could just get some answers to the original question.
The discussion is about alcohol at kids birthday parties. Not family parties and not junk food and not how many beers you drink.
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If you know what I mean. 
But it's okay, because "The party is for the kids" aka "No one's supposed to consume anything that can harm their health and make them act differently except for the children".