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If I lived in a reasonably safe neighborhood, I would allow my 8 year old to go to the park WITH friends and an older sibling, or another older child that could keep an eye on the group. But I wouldn't feel safe sending her alone, especially on some national day where any pervert freak knows that there will be unsupervised children alone there.
I understand the OP's desire to teach her child independence. I don't agree with constant hovering and helicopter parenting that seems to be so prevalent these days. Kids do need to be able to play freely and learn to handle certain situations themselves. However, there needs to be a reasonable measure of caution with that, and although 8 is no baby, that is still just such a vulnerable age.
OP, if you really feel okay with sending her alone, then make sure she has a cell phone and have her check in maybe every 15 minutes. And don't send her alone, there are safety in numbers. The more friends she's with, the safer she'll be.
So you never played at the park when you were a kid without your parents? Never played in the neighborhood without someone watching you?
The park is two blocks from our house in our small town.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat
Hello? I know what the discussion is about. Do you think a child predator knows or cares if a child is 2 blocks from home or across town? Of course not! It happens close to home, because that's where kids hang out. It is a meaningless stat. The kid is no more likely to be kidnapped from the park than from anywhere else. The OP doesn't think the kid is safe because he's close to home. The OP thinks his kid is fairly safe because child abductions are very rare. and, ya you deserve another of these
Why would the OP send his child 2 blocks from home to play in the park alone if he didn't think the child were safe??
My brother was assaulted by older kids at the park when we were kids, and we did live in a relatively safe suburban neighborhood. This kind of thing did not happen when we played in each other's yards. Part of the advantage of playing in the yards is that you had an idea of who would be there, and there was safety in numbers. At a park, you have no idea who will be there.
My brother was about two to three blocks from home, and I remember the screaming when he and his friend ran home following the attack. I would never leave an 8-year old child alone at a park. Near the house, they know many more people. They can go into any of the neighbors' houses for help if need be. I also always tell them to stay with their friends.
If you do leave your child, I am wondering if you have prepared her for questions from adults. Frankly, if an 8-year-old I did not know started playing with my child, at some point I may ask the kid where her mom or dad is. If she says she is there alone, I may hesitate to leave that child alone at the park and may feel an obligation to ensure the child gets home safely. A child who is alone in a park may be a red flag to some parents, particularly if the kid looks young for his or her age.
I would not just leave my kids at the park. There are too many "unknown" issues at the park. Notorious for pedophiles, homeless people, drug addicts....if you want your child to have some independence...a place with more supervision is appropriate...maybe the mall....where if she felt threatened there is mall security, store clerks....not just an empty park...
ellar - I'm sorry about your brother. I think you make a good point about other adults. She will be going to the park with a group of 4 kids from our neighborhood, all of whom will be there without adults. The park is in our neighborhood and she will likely know many if not all of the kids there. I will tell her what to say to an adult who questions her but my guess is that none will.
Quite honestly I'm surprised this thread has received so much heat, looking out my window right now I can see my neighbor's 1st grader out with our other neighbor's 9yr old, both are at least a block away from their houses and riding their bikes in the street. When I took the kids to the park (my other child is 5) yesterday there was a group of 8 or 9 year old boys playing basketball without an adult in sight. It just doesn't seem to be a big deal where we live.
I would not just leave my kids at the park. There are too many "unknown" issues at the park. Notorious for pedophiles, homeless people, drug addicts....if you want your child to have some independence...a place with more supervision is appropriate...maybe the mall....where if she felt threatened there is mall security, store clerks....not just an empty park...
The park is teeming with kids on a Saturday. Its funny you mention the mall, a mall to me is way scarier than a neighborhood park. Our area is pretty free of drug addicts and homeless people...its a little town and this isn't a city park, its a neighborhood park surrounded by homes.
Yes...the OP stated the child is okay, its only 2 blocks from home...again...you didn't read and go off on your tangent.
The OP thinks his child is safe 2 blocks from home...I said abduction happen within 2 blocks of home....what don't you get about that??
Your quote "Well, ya, because kids are usually close to home, not wandering on the other side of town"
Quote:
Originally Posted by virgode
Why would the OP send his child 2 blocks from home to play in the park alone if he didn't think the child were safe??
There it is above for you to read.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat
Hello? I know what the discussion is about. Do you think a child predator knows or cares if a child is 2 blocks from home or across town? Of course not! It happens close to home, because that's where kids hang out. It is a meaningless stat. The kid is no more likely to be kidnapped from the park than from anywhere else. The OP doesn't think the kid is safe because he's close to home. The OP thinks his kid is fairly safe because child abductions are very rare. and, ya you deserve another of these
OK, why don't you tell me why you think more abductions happen close to home than farther away.
The park is teeming with kids on a Saturday. Its funny you mention the mall, a mall to me is way scarier than a neighborhood park. Our area is pretty free of drug addicts and homeless people...its a little town and this isn't a city park, its a neighborhood park surrounded by homes.
I agree. A mall is one of the last places I was comfortable letting my kids go alone. I would also find a neighborhood park a more comfortable alternative to a big town or city park at first.
We once build a home in a new neighborhood. The builder used to pile scrap wood for my boys for their various projects. One day the wagon they were using to transport the wood broke, and they asked me to pick it up in my car. Youngest and friend were playing a video game, and I asked if they wanted to drive a couple of building lots away with me. They preferred to stay inside, so I let them. If they had opened the front door and called, I would have heard them. For months afterwards all youngest's attempts at play dates were rebuffed. Somebody finally told me that word had gotten out that I left my children unattended.
I had a neighbor in Brooklyn jump off the bridge, my parents never left me with them.
There are bad parents and neighbors out there, doesn't mean it is safe for a 7-8 year old out there by themselves.
The point is, that they are actually likely safer out there by themselves, statistically speaking. There are a ton more predators close to your children than there are in a neighborhood park or walking down the street.
Accosting strange children is risky, which is why most child crime is perpetrated by people in positions of trust, who are well known to the child and can manipulate them and keep them quiet.
Strangers grabbing them off the street is a far less likely scenario than them being continually harmed by an adult they know.
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