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My generation had our parents tell us, "We could not act up, because the neighbors would discipline us and then tell our parents when they got home."
It seems more times than not, that the lowest common denominators in our society keep having children.
What generation is this? My parents never said that to me, nor did I hear that directly or indirectly (through my parents) from my grandparents. It never crossed my mind that I had to be afraid of strangers punching me in the face, knocking my teeth out, or manhandling me when my parents weren't around. I still managed to be an okay kid.
Because we think this guy was out of line because he PUNCHED A KID IN THE MOUTH it translates to all of us raising kids who are running around with no limits and discipline?
That is not what I said and not why I feel SOME (not all) people on this forum are an example of why kids are so out of control. You failed to see the point of my post. You ignored where I said I didn't agree with what he did. Shocker.
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Maybe this forum is an example of level-headed people who realize you don't take your frustrations out by getting physical and taking out teeth every time your seat gets kicked.
Maybe. Maybe not. Depends on who you ask. There is nothing level headed about distorting and ignoring what other people say. But I agree with what I highlighted.
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Originally Posted by 3a's
Pass the chocolate-I am so sorry that you would feel this way but to come to such a conclusion is a closed minded individual. Anyone thinking that you can get positive actions from a physical attack is not right. You can draw boundaries with children without being physical and we all have bad days but it does give a right to hurting someone.
You also missed the point and ignored where I said I didn't agree with what he did. One can understand it without condoning it. And show me where I said or even implied that anything positive would come from a physical attack. Really, some of you only read what suits you, to the point that words just appear on your screen that aren't there.
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Originally Posted by Zimbochick
The examples you give are very exaggerated compared to a kid making a noise in a movie theater. Protecting oneself from physical aggression is not the same thing as throwing a punch at a stranger's head because they are annoying you.
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Originally Posted by WhipperSnapper 88
The examples you are giving aren't discipline, they are self defense.
Try again.....
He got punched for making a noise? That's it? Right or wrong, you could at least acknowledge what the man said happened. Objectivity.
But, I'll try again. The point of my post was that some of you say you would never approve of someone else disciplining your child. But self defense is different? So, in that case it is...understandable? Be careful, you might be accused of cheering on someone who punched a kid.
Anyway....self defense.
From the article:
"Kim told police the boys' behavior was worse than talking. He says they were hitting him and his girlfriend with popcorn, running back and forth in the aisle and bumping him with their arms."
This is his reasoning for losing it, as he freely admitted. He had already asked them to quiet down and stop throwing popcorn, but they just laughed at him. My first example was about what allegedly happened, just not from behind. No, they weren't throwing direct punches at the back of his head. But they were deliberately throwing popcorn and didn't care that they were hitting him while they were running back and forth in the aisles. That makes it deliberate, but he was not within his rights to "defend" himself. OK.
I think it was excessive. But he was, in his own way, defending himself. The issue here is in what that means to you.
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Originally Posted by PoppySead
Please identify yourself next time at the theater so that I know who I can freely punch in the teeth for making noise without a thought of consequence.
Another brilliant representation of the parenting forum.
He got punched for making a noise? That's it? Right or wrong, you could at least acknowledge what the man said happened. Objectivity.
But, I'll try again. The point of my post was that some of you say you would never approve of someone else disciplining your child. But self defense is different? So, in that case it is...understandable? Be careful, you might be accused of cheering on someone who punched a kid.
Anyway....self defense.
From the article:
"Kim told police the boys' behavior was worse than talking. He says they were hitting him and his girlfriend with popcorn, running back and forth in the aisle and bumping him with their arms."
This is his reasoning for losing it, as he freely admitted. He had already asked them to quiet down and stop throwing popcorn, but they just laughed at him. My first example was about what allegedly happened, just not from behind. No, they weren't throwing direct punches at the back of his head. But they were deliberately throwing popcorn and didn't care that they were hitting him while they were running back and forth in the aisles. That makes it deliberate, but he was not within his rights to "defend" himself. OK.
I think it was excessive. But he was, in his own way, defending himself. The issue here is in what that means to you.
Another brilliant representation of the parenting forum.
Alright, so you don't condone what happened, but understand it? Hmmm, a minutely fine line. Well I don't understand it. Either you ask the kids again a bit more forcefully to knock it off, or you find the manager, and ask them to deal with it, it is their job after all.
Somebody bumping into you does not mean you can unleash a face punch resulting in lost teeth. That is a gross distortion of self-defence.
There is nothing level headed about distorting and ignoring what other people say.
Ahhh, but a level headed person is often WISE to ignore what other people say.
As far as the distorting goes.... I never intentionally distort what someone else has posted. That's not my idea of internet "fun". If the post isn't clear to me or is badly written then, yes, I may be guilty of distorting what a person says through misunderstanding on my part. Thankfully that's not a hang-able offense in this country.
Alright, so you don't condone what happened, but understand it? Hmmm, a minutely fine line. Well I don't understand it. Either you ask the kids again a bit more forcefully to knock it off, or you find the manager, and ask them to deal with it, it is their job after all.
OK, so don't understand it. "Minutely fine line" is relative. I know what my lines are. They are difficult for some of you to grasp. I get that. But don't presume to tell me what they are.
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Somebody bumping into you does not mean you can unleash a face punch resulting in lost teeth. That is a gross distortion of self-defence.
I agree, but you people keep arguing that point. Why? What part of "I didn't agree with what he did" eludes you?
Distorting, exaggerating and minimizing seems to be a way of life here. Offering a different perspective is not distorting. I didn't say it was justifiable. I prefer to consider ALL the info provided, not just the bits that my personal beliefs and convictions highlight while dismissing the others. We all have different ways of processing information. So be it. Bottom line, "It is NEVER OK for someone to discipline my child" does turn into "Well, that's self defense, that's different". His case is not the only one on the planet and kids aren't always "just making a noise".
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Originally Posted by DewDropInn
Ahhh, but a level headed person is often WISE to ignore what other people say.
Sure. But that's not what I am referring to. Nice try though.
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As far as the distorting goes.... I never intentionally distort what someone else has posted. That's not my idea of internet "fun". If the post isn't clear to me or is badly written then, yes, I may be guilty of distorting what a person says through misunderstanding on my part. Thankfully that's not a hang-able offense in this country.
I never intentionally type one thing that means the complete opposite either.
Maybe when people are reading the OP, everyone is interpreting it in a different way. I read "Would you approve of a stranger physically disciplining your child if you aren't around?" as another adult physically punishing my child, which I would NOT approve of. If my kid is behaving in a manner that is so out of control, an adult should have other ways of handling it, like contacting me, or the police if it's that bad. Now if she assaults another kid, and the kid slugs her back, oh well, that's what she gets. But no strange adult should be putting his or her hands on someone else's child.
Now if it were a situation where my kid was kicking some grown person in the shins, thowing things, biting, etc., and the adult restrained her to keep her from hurting him, I wouldn't have a problem with that. If he punched her in the face, I WOULD have a problem with that. There is a such thing as excessive force, and what happened in that movie theater was WAY excessive. All that man had to do was go complain to the movie theater manager. The kids would have been removed, and he could have enjoyed free tickets to another movie. Instead, he earned himself a trip to jail. I also find it contradictory that he claims he didn't know the person he hit was just a child, but then claims to have watched the kid running around, throwing popcorn, and elbowing him. He knew full well that was a kid he hit, and as an adult he should have been able to show more common sense, restraint, and maturity. Instead he chose to act like a kid himself. I have been annoyed by rowdy kids in movie theaters before, but I never felt the urge to assault anyone over it. To me, that kind of reaction is NOT understandable at all.
Maybe when people are reading the OP, everyone is interpreting it in a different way. I read "Would you approve of a stranger physically disciplining your child if you aren't around?" as another adult physically punishing my child, which I would NOT approve of. If my kid is behaving in a manner that is so out of control, an adult should have other ways of handling it, like contacting me, or the police if it's that bad. Now if she assaults another kid, and the kid slugs her back, oh well, that's what she gets. But no strange adult should be putting his or her hands on someone else's child.
Now if it were a situation where my kid was kicking some grown person in the shins, thowing things, biting, etc., and the adult restrained her to keep her from hurting him, I wouldn't have a problem with that. If he punched her in the face, I WOULD have a problem with that. There is a such thing as excessive force, and what happened in that movie theater was WAY excessive. All that man had to do was go complain to the movie theater manager. The kids would have been removed, and he could have enjoyed free tickets to another movie. Instead, he earned himself a trip to jail. I also find it contradictory that he claims he didn't know the person he hit was just a child, but then claims to have watched the kid running around, throwing popcorn, and elbowing him. He knew full well that was a kid he hit, and as an adult he should have been able to show more common sense, restraint, and maturity. Instead he chose to act like a kid himself. I have been annoyed by rowdy kids in movie theaters before, but I never felt the urge to assault anyone over it. To me, that kind of reaction is NOT understandable at all.
I agree with this. No stranger has the right to hit your child, but if the child is attacking them, they do have a right to restrain them. In the case given though, he did not even have to do that as the alternative would be to have the theater management take care of the problem.
Physically intervening is not an option with any kid, mine or anyone else's. Only sadists and bullies hit children for any reason.
When I'm out biking, I often pass a house where a single mother raises three kids, two boys aged four and about 12, and a 10-year-old girl. The three are often home alone while the mom is at work. (I think the father is dead.) I often hear snippets of what the kids are like. (I'll hear the girl: "Mom! Tell Billy to stop putting his dirty underwear in my face!" was one I will always remember.)
The 12-year-old loves to bully the four-year-old. I was on my way to work one morning last summer, and he was dragging the four-year-old toward the house, singing, "We're going to shove Eddie's head in the toilet and then flush it!" At first, the four-year-old thought his brother was kidding, and then began bawling as they got closer to the house. I nearly intervened in that case, but, I admit, I was afraid of being late to work, so I didn't. I still wonder if I was right to let them work it out.
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Be careful, you might be accused of cheering on someone who punched a kid. 
Thought About Intervening with Kids Not My Own
