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I knew it would eventually happen but I'm still not prepared for this at age 9. One of my daughters has been invited to a Glitz and Gloss Spa BD Party. It is in somebody's home done by a mobile spa group. The invite also included a waiver for me to sign about makeup, nail polish, oils, lotions, etc.
Fundamentally I am opposed to this kind of activity for 9 year old girls. I don't wear makeup, my adult daughter does not, my young girls have never shown any interest in it either. We emphasize clean hair and skin, no perfumes, etc. I have even managed to raise 3 daughters without ever buying a single Barbie- although they have been given a few as gifts.
The little girl is not even a close friend and it looks like maybe all the girls in her class are invited. I doubt any harm will be done but it's just the whole idea that creeps me out. I have not talked to her about it yet. This girl will not even let me talk to her about periods and leaves when her sister and I get out the body book to discuss puberty.
How would you handle this, especially if you have the same attitude i do about beauty and beauty products?
First world problem much? Seriously lighten up. Your daughter will have fun. If you don't want her to go, then tell her no, otherwise let her go and enjoy herself, and she can develop her own opinions on titivating.
I find those types of parties a little over the top for little girls and I've seen them for MUCH younger girls before. That said, I would let her go if she wants to go and not say anything about it. When she comes home all glammed up tell her that she looks pretty but even more beautiful without all the makeup, etc. Your values that you pass onto your daughter through everyday living regarding appearance and body image will trump any glitz and glam type of party your child will attend.
I think if you are fundamentally opposed, then however you arrive at the decision, and however you communicate it to your child, she isn't going to the party. Once you have that part worked out in your mind, the rest is just details.
Since it's something that your dd doesn't show an interest in anyway, I don't think she'd mind missing it. At least you don't have to deal with a battle and a bunch of, "But Mom, WHY?" However, if she wanted to, I don't think it would do any harm in letting her go. As long as she understood your feelings on the subject, and your rules, having a little fun at a two hour party isn't going to cause her to forget the convictions she's grown up with.
Why do you "dread" this anyway? Are you afraid she'll come home from one party addicted to glam?
If you obsess about it, she will pick up on it. Sure, it's a stupid idea for young girls but it's a common fantasy for them to dress up and make up at that age. Act like it's just another party and let her decide, then be willing to live with her decision.
The dismissive "first world" talk is insulting. You decide if a problem is a problem. But don't create one.
The dismissive "first world" talk is insulting. You decide if a problem is a problem. But don't create one.
Why is it insulting? In my world someone "dreading" that their child be invited to a dress-up party is pretty strange. There are many things I "dread" for my children, dress-up isn't one of them.
Because you can say that about any issue on this forum. And then why are we here, anyway? No one is on the forum asking how to install a well in their backyard so they can have fresh drinking water. (I guess that would be the "House" forum anyway. ) It's mostly braces and bikes and iPods etc.
Calling it a "first world problem" stops all discussion at the door by making the OP feel stupid and selfish about asking a question that is important to them.
The glitz and glam party isn't really the core issue. It's about parental values. This event, whether it's a manicure party or packing food boxes for the homeless, is causing a conflict for the mom. You slapping her question down by calling it a "first world problem" negates her feelings.
Because you can say that about any issue on this forum. And then why are we here, anyway? Calling it a "first world problem" stops all discussion at the door by making the OP feel stupid and selfish about asking a question that is important to them.
The glitz and glam party isn't really the core issue. It's about parental values. This event, whether it's a manicure party or packing food boxes for the homeless, is causing a conflict for the mom. You slapping her question down by calling it a "first world problem" negates her feelings.
She came here for help, not ridicule.
The OP is quite capable of voicing her opinions to me if she so chooses.
I also happen to know that the OP and I share many core values, so I found her elevation of this particular issue to "dread" status to be surprising.
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) It's mostly braces and bikes and iPods etc.
