Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't think this warrants reporting. Like a previous poster said, she probably only asked the question and made the statement to see what sort of person this lady was applying for the job.
Besides, my great grandmother used to make us go get the switch to whip our behinds
Does the OP know for a fact that the mother was not serious? If she doesn't know for sure then it should be reported and don't ignore it based upon assumptions.
I know ignoring it and looking the other way is easy for some people but that's not my style. When the safety of children is at issue I'd report it and I don't really care if people don't like that advice.
Does the OP know for a fact that the mother was not serious? If she doesn't know for sure then it should be reported and don't ignore it based upon assumptions.
I know ignoring it and looking the other way is easy for some people but that's not my style. When the safety of children is at issue... I don't really care what anyone thinks.
You are correct, the OP doesn't know for a fact however, what's going to happen when she reports the woman and in reality the woman wasn't serious, was just reversing a scenerio to weed out possible child abusers? The fact is I wouldn't rush to judgment. Too many times the dept. children and family are called in and create turmoil in families lives for parents just spanking their children. IMO children/family services hurts more than it helps. I've seen too many cases where there were over zealous workers breaking up families for whippings (not child abuse) and then I've seen just the opposite, where there was child abuse/neglect, they failed miserably by allowing the children to remain in the household.
If it were me, I would have arranged a face-to-face interview with the woman so that I could see for myself if the children were being abused (it most times is obvious), but because she didn't, almost makes it a mute issue at this point! IMO
Just FYI, I am not one of those people who look the other way - however neither am I one to jump to conclusions and create possible chaos simply based off of an Internet meeting/interview/conversation
I'm the one who posted this, I only received an email I don't know anything else about her and when I told her (by email) that I wouldn't do that I never heard from back from her. At first it just made me mad but, when I look at my own kids its killing me I don't want to just sit back. its not the point of her discipling her kids everyone doesn't have to agree on that. Its the whole point that she would ask me to do that and she doesn't know me. If she would ask a me that what do the people that know her/her do to these kids? and how old are they? As you can see its tearing me up. Anyone have any suggestion?
I am a nanny looking for work so I posted an ad. This one lady asked me if I would mind beating her kids with a switch if they got out of hand and that she would give me written permission. That is so wrong I wrote her back saying that no matter what the job or the pay I would never do that a child no less to kids that aren't even mine. I also, asked her what would make her ask someone she hadn't even met to do that? Is she crazy? You don't ask other people to beat your kids. I'm a mother of three and I would never ask somebody that. Just letting off some steam about this. Can't help but feel bad for her kids
You were right not to do it. That is child abuse and I might well have reported her if I were you. Now, an occasional swat on the but with bare hands is I think another story, -but best to keep even that to a minimum. studies show frequent spanking to be harmful and ineffective. -Emil.
You are correct, the OP doesn't know for a fact however, what's going to happen when she reports the woman and in reality the woman wasn't serious, was just reversing a scenerio to weed out possible child abusers? The fact is I wouldn't rush to judgment. Too many times the dept. children and family are called in and create turmoil in families lives for parents just spanking their children. IMO children/family services hurts more than it helps. I've seen too many cases where there were over zealous workers breaking up families for whippings (not child abuse) and then I've seen just the opposite, where there was child abuse/neglect, they failed miserably by allowing the children to remain in the household.
If it were me, I would have arranged a face-to-face interview with the woman so that I could see for myself if the children were being abused (it most times is obvious), but because she didn't, almost makes it a mute issue at this point! IMO
Just FYI, I am not one of those people who look the other way - however neither am I one to jump to conclusions and create possible chaos simply based off of an Internet meeting/interview/conversation
I'd rather report it and be wrong... than not report it and be wrong about kids being abused. Abuse is underreported not overreported - my aunt is a social worker, she's not over zealous but overworked - most of them do the best they can and should be commended for their efforts, not criticized for breaking up families. There are some sick (not to mention stupid) people out there who think they are doing their kids a favor by whipping them with switches. The chaos started with a mother asking the question of "will you whip my kids...???" variety - so really, it's her own fault if someone reports it... and up the authorities if there's abuse involved.
If you want to call reporting a potential threat to children "rushing to judgement" then I'm done with reading your nonsense.
Last edited by mommabear2; 10-04-2007 at 02:58 PM..
I'd rather report it and be wrong... than not report it and be wrong about kids being abused. Abuse is underreported not overreported - my aunt is a social worker, she's not over zealous but overworked - most of them do the best they can and should be commended for their efforts, not criticized for breaking up families. There are some sick (not to mention stupid) people out there who think they are doing their kids a favor by whipping them with switches. The chaos started with a mother asking the question of "will you whip my kids...???" variety - so really, it's her own fault if someone reports it... and up the authorities if there's abuse involved.
I'm far from stupid and if my child warrants behaviour of a whipping, then she will get it. Just because someone chooses to raise his/her children different than what you might do, doesn't make them stupid. I could call you stupid for allowing a child to run you raggedy with the "time out" madness - but did I do that?
While we can both agree that there are some social workers who are overworked, it still is no reason for failing to handle your duties and handle your responsibilities that come with the job. It's no reason to remove children from their parents because they get a whipping (whether or not with a switch).
Ohio: CPS Social Worker Fired For Not Following Court Orders
An astute judge, Melba Marsh of the Common Pleas Court in Hamilton County, Ohio, discovered her orders were not being followed by CPS social workers. Last month she wrote a letter to three county commissioners about it. She wanted a child to live with relatives and to have supervised visits with parents, but her orders were ignored for more than four months.
Because of this incident, CPS social worker Angela Harrison was found negligent and fired. She lost a $35,900/yr. job. Her supervisor, Michael Battle, retired from his job which brought him $57,137 annually.
Iowa: CPS Social Worker Charged With Perjury during TPR Hearing
Marie Mahler, 39, of Cedar Falls, filed three reports between Aug. 27, 2004, and Oct. 7, 2004, used in a juvenile court case that she “knew or reasonably should have known were false” and that the reports would be used by a judge to make a decision in the case, according to court records obtained by the Courier.
Mahler repeatedly included misrepresentations of conversations, events and relationships of the people involved with the case, according to court records.
Court records say she claimed that Jesup police officers were called to the mother’s home for a drug investigation in August 2004. Records indicate an officer was called to the home not for drugs, but to prevent an altercation between two siblings. No signs of drugs were found.
Mahler, who has been a Buchanan County social worker since 1998, pleaded ‘not guilty’.
Roger Munns, a spokesman for her employer, the Iowa Department of Human Services, said “This is really quite unusual.”
Yes, we know that caseworkers lie in court documents and get away with it, and that having one criminally charged is unusual. However we hope that this will become common practice to stop lying CPS social workers everywhere.
Texas: “The System Is Maxed”
“The system is maxed,” Patrick Crimmins said. “The system as designed, depending on your point of view, either cannot or will not absorb more children.”
Because foster care providers refuse to house hundreds of foster children, the children are forced to sleep in hotels or even in CPS offices.
Rather than admitting that far too many of the children in the state’s custody have been unjustly and unfairly taken from viable and loving parents, Crimmins, who is spokesman for the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services, blames the current crisis on a law that allows foster parents to refuse children, and on the children themselves, some of whom are labeled “severely disturbed”.
Are the children “severely disturbed” because they’ve been unfairly ripped from loving parents? Are they “severely disturbed” because of childhood mental illnesses that the parents were trying to control when they lost custody? What’s the story behind having so many homeless “severely disturbed” children in the state’s care?
I’d be disturbed too if I was taken from my parents by state-paid ‘do-gooders’ and forced into homelessness with strangers. And do they really expect children to take this kind of abusive treatment, and remain calm? What does this say about our society that we allow such cruelty to exist against the most helpless citizens, the children?
Meanwhile Texas legislators may pass laws forcing foster care providers to take children they don’t want.
“Allowing providers to pick and choose among foster children and the services they deliver undermines the entire foster care system,” Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn said, adding, ”It also puts caseworkers in a bind when contractors can dictate which children they will serve.”
I'm far from stupid and if my child warrants behaviour of a whipping, then she will get it. Just because someone chooses to raise his/her children different than what you might do, doesn't make them stupid. I could call you stupid for allowing a child to run you raggedy with the "time out" madness - but did I do that?
While we can both agree that there are some social workers who are overworked, it still is no reason for failing to handle your duties and handle your responsibilities that come with the job. It's no reason to remove children from their parents because they get a whipping (whether or not with a switch).
Ohio: CPS Social Worker Fired For Not Following Court Orders
An astute judge, Melba Marsh of the Common Pleas Court in Hamilton County, Ohio, discovered her orders were not being followed by CPS social workers. Last month she wrote a letter to three county commissioners about it. She wanted a child to live with relatives and to have supervised visits with parents, but her orders were ignored for more than four months.
Because of this incident, CPS social worker Angela Harrison was found negligent and fired. She lost a $35,900/yr. job. Her supervisor, Michael Battle, retired from his job which brought him $57,137 annually.
Iowa: CPS Social Worker Charged With Perjury during TPR Hearing
Marie Mahler, 39, of Cedar Falls, filed three reports between Aug. 27, 2004, and Oct. 7, 2004, used in a juvenile court case that she “knew or reasonably should have known were false” and that the reports would be used by a judge to make a decision in the case, according to court records obtained by the Courier.
Mahler repeatedly included misrepresentations of conversations, events and relationships of the people involved with the case, according to court records.
Court records say she claimed that Jesup police officers were called to the mother’s home for a drug investigation in August 2004. Records indicate an officer was called to the home not for drugs, but to prevent an altercation between two siblings. No signs of drugs were found.
Mahler, who has been a Buchanan County social worker since 1998, pleaded ‘not guilty’.
Roger Munns, a spokesman for her employer, the Iowa Department of Human Services, said “This is really quite unusual.”
Yes, we know that caseworkers lie in court documents and get away with it, and that having one criminally charged is unusual. However we hope that this will become common practice to stop lying CPS social workers everywhere.
Texas: “The System Is Maxed”
“The system is maxed,” Patrick Crimmins said. “The system as designed, depending on your point of view, either cannot or will not absorb more children.”
Because foster care providers refuse to house hundreds of foster children, the children are forced to sleep in hotels or even in CPS offices.
Rather than admitting that far too many of the children in the state’s custody have been unjustly and unfairly taken from viable and loving parents, Crimmins, who is spokesman for the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services, blames the current crisis on a law that allows foster parents to refuse children, and on the children themselves, some of whom are labeled “severely disturbed”.
Are the children “severely disturbed” because they’ve been unfairly ripped from loving parents? Are they “severely disturbed” because of childhood mental illnesses that the parents were trying to control when they lost custody? What’s the story behind having so many homeless “severely disturbed” children in the state’s care?
I’d be disturbed too if I was taken from my parents by state-paid ‘do-gooders’ and forced into homelessness with strangers. And do they really expect children to take this kind of abusive treatment, and remain calm? What does this say about our society that we allow such cruelty to exist against the most helpless citizens, the children?
Meanwhile Texas legislators may pass laws forcing foster care providers to take children they don’t want.
“Allowing providers to pick and choose among foster children and the services they deliver undermines the entire foster care system,” Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn said, adding, ”It also puts caseworkers in a bind when contractors can dictate which children they will serve.”
I'm going to call anyone stupid who whips their kids with a switch or abuses their kids because they are in fact... stupid. Disciplining is one thing... beating your kids with switches is another. You may not see it as abuse but it is whether you believe it or not.
I wonder how many kids have been left in abusive households because anti-reporting-gotta-see-blood-first people like you exist.
Please, spare me your rantings. I've heard enough nonsense for the day. Go bother someone else.
My settings... buddy list/IGNORE... ayannaaaliyah. Just in case you don't respect my wishes.
I do think they take too many children away from home overall, and there is evidence of racial discrimination in that regard. Parenting classes as well as other forms of help, and adequate monitoring of progress, should be a big part of this and not just taking kids away permanently. Also, kids who are in long term care should have benefits until they are 21. not be kicked out of the home when they turn 18. Doing that leads to many serious problems.
Some kids will of coarse half to be permanently removed, but that is overdone. Studies show that on the whole, kids growing up in foster care do worse than those who live in abusive homes whith one or both biological parents. There are high rates of abuse in foster homes, and keeping families together and helping them work things out I think must be a stronger priority! -Emil.
MommaBear2, please grow up, this forum is an open discussion for people to express their opinions and viewpoints. People in life can agree to disagree, but to DISRESPECT someone by calling them stupid for whipping their children with switches is SO CHILDISH, as is "settings/ignore ayannaaaliyah".
Whipping a child with a switch is no different than whipping a child with a belt for that matter. Beating is a totally different story. If you prefer the method of "time out for little bryce" or "please don't talk to mommy like that" - then that is YOUR BUSINESS and YOUR RIGHT. I don't have to agree with it. If I choose to "snatch my child by the arm" or "pop her behind with a switch" then that is MY BUSINESS and MY RIGHT......Who made you Judge & Jury to call the next person STUPID - that is just plain IGNORANT on your part!
I'm the one who posted this, I only received an email I don't know anything else about her and when I told her (by email) that I wouldn't do that I never heard from back from her. At first it just made me mad but, when I look at my own kids its killing me I don't want to just sit back. its not the point of her discipling her kids everyone doesn't have to agree on that. Its the whole point that she would ask me to do that and she doesn't know me. If she would ask a me that what do the people that know her/her do to these kids? and how old are they? As you can see its tearing me up. Anyone have any suggestion?
Well, you could print out the e-mail and hand it over to your local child services and/or police station and tell them what you posted here. I doubt that anything can be done because of the method of communication but at least you did what you could.
More people should be concerned about children like you - the world would be a better place.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Too many kids kept in foster care.
