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18 years = adult, when you become an adult you have freedom and responsibility
No sex in my house = house rules
nothing more than that. Still love em, still have family visits, and in the end I would love who they love.
So where do you have sex since you don't allow it in your house?
As to throwing out the child, it would depend on how they acted. If they acted like normal everyday people, as most gays do, it would be fine. If he started prancing around with a feather boa amd lisping when he never lisped before he would be gone.
Some time back in the 1980s my uncle's son came out as gay. My uncle being the hard headed nasty version of Archie Bunker that he is, disowned the son who eventually made his way to San Francisco. The next time he saw that son was in the early 1990s when the son returned home one last time before dying of aids. There was no anger in the uncle's eyes when he visited his son in the hospital and at the funeral. His cantankerous nature has cost him the rest of his surviving sons when he truly needs them the most. His wife past away a few years ago, he's on home oxygen, uses a motorized chair to function, and is getting up in years (he served in the National Guard during the Cuban Missile Crisis). He never really saw action but because we live on the Gulf of Mexico, National Guard troops in the area were called to active duty during that missile crisis.
One day the father who wrote that letter will regret what he wrote. Hopefully he'll realize his mistake before a funeral. To those who are so critical of the father, don't be so quick to shower him with hatred. He's acting not only based upon his beliefs, but also by things he experienced as a child growing up. I agree what he did was wrong and hopefully he'll make peace with his son, but instead of feeling angry towards him, I pity him. What things could he have endured growing up to make him turn his back on his son for something as simple as this? Some parents will stand by their kid even if convicted of horrible crimes. This is more than pride. Personally, I feel the son should treat his dad like a strange nervous dog. Make occasional attempts at contact on his dad's grounds. Let the dad come to him in his own time. Don't push his dad to accept his homosexuality. Take baby steps. There may be difficult times ahead. Walk away without engaging in arguing. When things calm down try to discuss reasonably.
Some time back in the 1980s my uncle's son came out as gay. My uncle being the hard headed nasty version of Archie Bunker that he is, disowned the son who eventually made his way to San Francisco. The next time he saw that son was in the early 1990s when the son returned home one last time before dying of aids. There was no anger in the uncle's eyes when he visited his son in the hospital and at the funeral. His cantankerous nature has cost him the rest of his surviving sons when he truly needs them the most. His wife past away a few years ago, he's on home oxygen, uses a motorized chair to function, and is getting up in years (he served in the National Guard during the Cuban Missile Crisis). He never really saw action but because we live on the Gulf of Mexico, National Guard troops in the area were called to active duty during that missile crisis.
One day the father who wrote that letter will regret what he wrote. Hopefully he'll realize his mistake before a funeral. To those who are so critical of the father, don't be so quick to shower him with hatred. He's acting not only based upon his beliefs, but also by things he experienced as a child growing up. I agree what he did was wrong and hopefully he'll make peace with his son, but instead of feeling angry towards him, I pity him. What things could he have endured growing up to make him turn his back on his son for something as simple as this? Some parents will stand by their kid even if convicted of horrible crimes. This is more than pride. Personally, I feel the son should treat his dad like a strange nervous dog. Make occasional attempts at contact on his dad's grounds. Let the dad come to him in his own time. Don't push his dad to accept his homosexuality. Take baby steps. There may be difficult times ahead. Walk away without engaging in arguing. When things calm down try to discuss reasonably.
This is a very thoughtful and compassionate post. I really respect your view, and wish I could be as forgiving as you and as empathetic. This is just one area that makes me see red like no other. But I admire your ability to see it from all sides. I admit I don't have that in me. Good for you.
I have never said this on CD before..
My Mother asked me when I was 14 if I was gay, 1984 I guess...
She said she kinda knew it since I hit puberety..
Funny she had my feelings figured out before I did..
I was blessed with a very wide open and accepting family.
Both my parents told me that if I was gay they'd disown me completely. So I just brought home a ton of girls every night and it was...omg just drove by a Chic fil a. Gotta go guys.
No, her children are not required to belong to the same church. Nor are they required to live in Mom and Dad's house on their dime when they're over 18. (You'll note she qualified it by saying 18.)
There is a BIG difference between disowning a child and not allowing a child to live as he pleases in YOUR home when he's over 18. Knowing psr from her posts I don't think she's talking about disowning her child. Just asking him to move out. She clarified in her post #11.
Yep, once you are over 18 you no longer have to live with me. I would never disown my child. While I would not condone the behavior, I would still accept my child as my child, flaws and all.
I get it that parents can throw kids out of the house once they are adults. They can do it for any reason, or for no reason at all. I really do get that as I have one young adult child myself.
However, people who act as if their child owes it to them to behave a certain way "or else....." really do irritate me. Children are not possessions. We do not own the right to control every single thought in our children's heads just because they live in our homes.
I understand that if a parent does not approve of an adult child's life they certainly have the right to ask them to leave. For any reason, or for no reason. I just think that kicking a child out because they engage in sexual activity is totally and completely ridiculous. I also think it's ridiculous to throw them out because they belong to a different church. Or to no church.
I understand that people are not required to support their children when they are over the age of 18. I support parents right to make that choice. I just don't think that we own our children's thoughts just because we do allow them to live in our homes at any age.
I've said before why we believe the way we do. We believe that it is our duty to get our children to Heaven. In fact, the teaching of our Church is that the father is basically 100% responsible for the faith of the child. We cannot allow someone to live in our house who is blatantly engaging in sinful behavior like that. To us, it would be the same as saying, we do not care one bit about where you end up for eternity.
I can't imagine throwing children out of the house just for being gay. Both of my parents are conservative (but not religious) and could care less whether their children are gay or straight. My conservative, religious extended family could also care less. Their religions (Catholic, Baptist, and Methodist) teach respect, love, and acceptance of other people. Throwing out gay children is not part of the equation.
Location: where people are either too stupid to leave or too stuck to move
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nope.. i maybe a little disappointed but hey they are gay not serial killers or drug addicts.
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