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I am not trying to gang up on you but you have got to go back and read your post OP. I am almost inclined to believe that this is a troll.
Its against CD policy to accuse someone of being a troll. Which im not.
He showed violence towards me. Because he was drunk, and he didnt love me or care about me or want to be with me. I was trying to force us to be a "family" when thats not what he wanted. I didnt know that. Trinitee was wanted by both of us. He never asked me to get an abortion (which would have been pointless because he knows thats murder) he wanted her.
I truly in my heart dont think he would ever lay a hand on her. He's the one against spanking. Im for it.
father daughter dates... the dad taking the daughter out to an expensive restraunt opening the door pulling out the chair....show the daughter that she should always be treated like this and never accept less from a man. Obviosuly I didnt mean a DATE. Smh
This is a small point compared to the larger issue you bring up. But I would not expect nor desire this kind of behavior from a FATHER toward a DAUGHTER. A father is a parent. A child's love for him paternal. A father is not a "man" in that sense to a daughter. (Side not of little importance: I personally don't expect chairs to be pulled out for me. I am perfectly capable of moving my chair. Chivalry is not the only means or even necessarily the best mens of showing respect.) A son or daughter should learn this from interactions and modelling from adults in his/her life. A father is a PARENT. Thus is every bit as responsible for teaching self sufficiency and the like as a mother. 1
Its against CD policy to accuse someone of being a troll. Which im not.
He showed violence towards me. Because he was drunk, and he didnt love me or care about me or want to be with me. I was trying to force us to be a "family" when thats not what he wanted. I didnt know that. Trinitee was wanted by both of us. He never asked me to get an abortion (which would have been pointless because he knows thats murder) he wanted her.
I truly in my heart dont think he would ever lay a hand on her. He's the one against spanking. Im for it.
Well good luck.
You have 18 years or so to analyze your actions.
Things I know about this guy based on CD posts. He doesn't pay child support to this child or the child he has with a past girlfriend. He was physically abusive to the op and he even hit her in front of his child. He rarely asks to see his child and when he does it's only for 15 minutes at a time. He is a grown man who is living in filth with his mother. He has an income but gets paid "under the table" (tax evasion). Mom says that he would smoke pot around the child. he hangs out with unsavory types. That's all I can remember. It doesn't paint a pretty picture of him.
Wow, what an awesome guy to have children with!
Anyone know where I can find more of him? Prison? Homeless shelter? Halfway house?
Ohiochic, it sounds like people in your life are pressuring you to keep your daughters bio father in the picture. I can certainly understand that you want your daughter to know her father and have him in her life but it doesn't sound like he will ever be the father figure or the Dad that you desire for her. If he's comfortable popping in and out of her life, how do you think that will feel for her as she gets older? I'm wondering what you think you should do?
Ohiochic, it sounds like people in your life are pressuring you to keep your daughters bio father in the picture. I can certainly understand that you want your daughter to know her father and have him in her life but it doesn't sound like he will ever be the father figure or the Dad that you desire for her. If he's comfortable popping in and out of her life, how do you think that will feel for her as she gets older?I'm wondering what you think you should do?
Italics: Worth thinking about. Bold: THIS. You are her Mom. You are there day in day out. What do YOU think you should do?
I am not trying to gang up on you but you have got to go back and read your post OP. I am almost inclined to believe that this is a troll.
I think she's a real poster who thru a mixture of very bad luck and very poor desion making seems to keep landing in these "hot mess" situations....
Just two months ago she posted wanting to know why she was in a relationship with a man that treated her badly (different guy than she now claims to be in wonderful relationship with...) oh, and somehow had , by accident, became in a lesbian relationship by having sex with a girl who then thought they were exclusive or something?
I'm glad OP mentioned she is seeing someone to try and figure out a way to prevent her past from leading her to continue to make these horrible decisions.... OP seems bright and motivated to provide better life/childhood for her daughter than she had but I have a hard time reading her posts because it always seem like one step forward (I'm going back to school) alwasy seems two or more steps back (pro-spanking, trying to get this guy to step up to the plate, jumping in and out of relationships...)
I think it's dangerous to post your pictures here, as well of those of your daughter. I also suggest you don't meet up with people that you meet online. Good luck.
Oh come on. Yes the OP may have made have made an "err" in judgement when she decided to have a child with this man, but a child is never a mistake and there should be no "breeding laws" anywhere. No one has the right to impose their beliefs, values and own personal feelings on to others. And thank you God for that. That being said, obviously this guy is shady(from what some of you have posted about him), he is not in any position to be a GOOD father to the OP's daughter right now, which is ultimately what the daughter needs. But those of you ranking on the OP about why she decided to breed with this man, or how "bad" of a person she is really need to stop throwing stones at glass houses. She is a human being. She made a bad decision, but she's doing her best(from what she has written) to move on from that. She is in school. She is trying to get her life together for her daughter. She is NO longer with this man. And obviously takes care of her daughter on her own. I see no point in ranking on her about what was obviously a bad decision made in the PAST. Focus on the present situation, which is what she posted.
I think she's a real poster who thru a mixture of very bad luck and very poor desion making seems to keep landing in these "hot mess" situations....
Just two months ago she posted wanting to know why she was in a relationship with a man that treated her badly (different guy than she now claims to be in wonderful relationship with...) oh, and somehow had , by accident, became in a lesbian relationship by having sex with a girl who then thought they were exclusive or something?
I'm glad OP mentioned she is seeing someone to try and figure out a way to prevent her past from leading her to continue to make these horrible decisions.... OP seems bright and motivated to provide better life/childhood for her daughter than she had but I have a hard time reading her posts because it always seem like one step forward (I'm going back to school) alwasy seems two or more steps back (pro-spanking, trying to get this guy to step up to the plate, jumping in and out of relationships...)
Oh my Gawd, once again someone trying to enforce their OWN values and beliefs and opinions on how to rear a child on to someone else. If she is pro-spanking that does NOT mean she is taking two steps back. That is her personal belief about how to discipline HER child. You may not agree, and that is why if you have children you CAN discipline and rear them just the way that YOU want. But it's not for you to try to judge a person for rearing her child the way she see's "fit". There is no abuse going on(not that I'm aware of). I'm not even for spanking myself, but see no point in judging someone else's parenting if that person decides to discipline their child with spankings.
And trying to get this guy to step up to the plate isn't necessarily taking two steps back, she is doing what she thinks is best for her daughter(having her bio father in her life) it's with good intention even if some of us wouldn't make that same effort for such a man.
In terms of her relationships and jumping in and out--yes I agree probably not the best for her child. However this topic is about what she should do about her daughters father...
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