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I'd see an attorney there in Texas asap...get a Consult . Sounds like you need to make a decent life for yourself and your child. I'm not from Texas or Mass. But, what I understand is if neither of you have parental papers...it's even steven. With more on your side because You have been the primary caregiver for the baby??? Your boyfriend doesn't live w/ you for how long?? Does he contribute to child's support, or anything?? All these are on your side.
You are primary caregiver, you are not getting child support, equal opp of getting custody, w/ odds on your side for the reasons I've stated. Plus take pictures of that horrible house....unsafe?? drinking etc around baby?...all these things are against the baby Daddy...Plus you are not married....Good luck
First of all, he is an alcoholic. He's been through detox twice, done a 30 day treatment program, and can not control his alcohol. He went right back to his old ways immediately after treatment. He is also a mean, abusive drunk. So please don't question my labeling him an alcoholic or speaking about the recovery process. Also, he doesn't like AA and doesn't want outside help for his problem.
I would like my son to have a relationship with his dad but I have to put his best interests first. His life will be better if we move. If it's possible to arrange visitation so his dad can be in his life I'm all for it. But his well being comes first.
You are totally right, and as the mother you have to protect your child. Here in N.D. if you have parental control, are the one caring for the child for 6 mths custody is already assumed to be yours. Check there in Texas...Grand PA has absolutely no rights....in fact maybe you should file a protection order against him if he is threatening you.(if you were there)
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I'm not an attorney, so this isn't legal advice.................But, if you were my daughter I'd get you to an attorney right there in Texas and get custodial papers filed asap. I personally would never want you to go back to Mass...But you'll have to make those decisions.
If there has been any sort of physical abuse go and talk to a domestic violence counselor at women's center....They often have attorneys on staff.
...But most judges won't take a small child from the mother, especially if there has been a history of alcohol or other substance abuse by the father. You have been the primary caregiver, you are the responsible one. Are there any criminal charges, DUI? No job, a hazardous house, etc. Just get to the right attorney. My guess is this guy will just move and follow you..but at least you'll have your Mother's support and your papers in order. I hope and pray things go well for you.
document everything you do with dates, photos, etc so in case you ever have to go to court you will have proof. videos and voice mail, emails, texts--all those sorts of things can make a big difference down the line.
you need to talk to a lawyer familiar with interstate and residency laws. You haven't even been in Mass 6 months, do you have a mass driver's license? bank account? any utility bills in YOUR name? You may still be legally a Wisconsin resident, thus your child a Wisconsin resident and tied by Wisconsin law in regards to custody.
As to the immediate situation, I'd get outta Dodge soon.... very soon before residency can be established. If I were a betting woman, I don't forsee the father being one to pursue you for custody.
Now, as a child with an absent, alcoholic father, do everything you can to keep the lines of communication open between your child and the father.... mailing bi-weekly letters from the child (yes, 14months old can create correspondence) from the child to the father. Even if the father doesn't respond, you, the mother, has tried..... in the future, this will be honored by the child.
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