For homeschoolers: studying in bed? (weight, friends, health, dad)
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I'm not saying the original post is a good example of this (actually, it's probably an example of not really understanding those differences, but realizing that they are there), but the fact is that boys and girls do learn very differently. There is a huge movement that is finally recognizing this fact and institutional schools which are primarily designed to teach girls (mostly because the majority of teachers are girls and don't understand the way boys learn) are now branching out into well researched philosophies of how boys learn. It's slow going. Most schools have not applied this research, mostly because it is somewhat difficult to apply teaching the male brain in a classroom environment.
Abigail Norfleet James is a leading researcher in the area of differentiated learning. She has written several books, two entitled "Teaching the Female Brain" and "Teaching the Male Brain." These books are fascinating because they relate information that had previously been understood as a steroetype but now we have research that helps us understand why some of those stereotypes are true and should be handled differently in the classroom.
For example, did you know that the frontal lobe of boys brains are not fully developed until age 26? Literally, the tissue in the brain has not grown yet, and so when boys party in college (too much drinking and drugs) it permanently affects their intellect because the tissue does not develop properly. Also, the left side of the boys brain (which is linked to language development) develops later than boys than in girls, which is why boys are often later readers than girls.
So a good educator who was aware of this reading difference would be much more relaxed in teaching reading to a young boy, understanding that he may not be developmentally ready yet, and following his cues. I have three boys of my own. Two of them were much later readers. Had they been in school, they would have been labeled with a learning disability, most likely. But because they were home schooling I could differentiate their learning (and individualize it). They are both reading well above average now, they just started later.
My daughter, typical of girls, was reading well before Kindergarten.
Ya, I'm aware. I have boys. You missed the point. The OP told his son that reading in bed is effeminate. Possibly the silliest think I've ever read here, and that's really saying something.
Also, help me out here ladies. Lots of you object angrily to my asserting that studying in bed is an effeminate habit. I'd like to know where this is coming from. There could be several motives ...
1. You don't believe in the concept of effeminacy because you believe in total equality of the sexes.
2. You do believe in the concept of effeminacy, but you believe it's always a good thing in either sex.
3. You do believe in the concept of effeminacy, but you don't believe it matters one way or the other.
4. You do believe in the concept of effeminacy, but you don't believe studying in bed is effeminate.
OP lighten up just a little bit. I don't spend 20 hours a day in my bed. I do other thing with my life. Studying in bed is not "the devil".
I think he's more concerned that it's effeminate. And that, in boys, acceptance of an (apparently) effeminate trait, might imply acceptance of other effeminate traits....which is just a step or two away from accepting homosexuality. So it (any overtly effeminate traits engaged in by male family members) must surely be nipped in the bud.
I think he's more concerned that it's effeminate. And that, in boys, acceptance of an (apparently) effeminate trait, might imply acceptance of other effeminate traits....which is just a step or two away from accepting homosexuality. So it (any overtly effeminate traits engaged in by male family members) must surely be nipped in the bud.
Lol. The way he described it is effeminate (the whole, "makes me wanna bring them hot tea and maybe a kitten) it's just his opinion of it. I don't believe reading in bed is effeminate, but that's just me.
Obviously, "all day" was hyperbole (<-- click the link). I think it was happening 1-4 hours per day, varying from day to day and child to child.
Yes, it bothered me enough to mention it, so I mentioned it. It's not the end of the world, but we're not aiming for mediocrity here. I'm not worried about my boys being effeminate, but about developing effeminate habits that won't serve them well in life - even small habits known to no one but themselves. I still don't understand what you think is inconsistent about this.
Maybe your son is gay.
That wouldn't matter, would it? You would still love him and support him, wouldn't you?
And you would welcome his partner/husband into your home, just as you would if he brought home a girl, wouldn't you?
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So it (any overtly effeminate traits engaged in by male family members) must surely be nipped in the bud. 
