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Actually, a 65 year old male can expect, statistically, to live to be 82. A 65 year old woman can expect to live to be 85 (in the US). Of course, this means nothing for an individual person.
Men can reproduce forever, therefore nature must think it's not necessary to have a father around very long. (Not that I agree with this.) For me, having raised a family, and being in my 60s (youngest is 25), I don't think I'd want to have another baby. If I'd never done it, maybe I would. I do think, and this is just gut level, based on emotionalism, that age 60 should be the cutoff for the mom.
As far as being "old" parents, Alzheimer's can strike people in their 50s. People are living longer and healthier these days.
Having a baby in your early 40's is fine. My mother, my sister, my husband's grandmother and I all had our youngest child at around age 42.
I have to admit, though, and my husband even noticed, I didn't have nearly as much energy as I did the last time I had a little one running around, which was when I was in my early 30's.
With my youngest, sometimes our playtime consisted of me laying on the floor, while he pretended I was a climbing gym. "Airplane" is another good game you can play while taking a rest lying on the floor.
If you are intentionally becoming a parent past your mid 40s, you need to pay more than the usual attention to a support network. Hopefully, you are financially comfortable, and can provide for your child should the worst happen.
You'll also need to go out of your way to ensure that your child doesn't get shortchanged because their parents were physically too weak to get out there and play, or hike, or do whatever activities with them. I realize that there are plenty of 55 year olds who are very vigorous, and can handle it. Many aren't.
60+, with a newborn, and you chose this on purpose? I can't say I approve, period. But opinions aren't worth much, are they?
I also feel that it isn't the same thing when older parents adopt and I cannot pin down why I feel that way. Really, if it is unacceptable to become a biological parent at a certain age then logically it should follow that the same is true for adoption but I don't FEEL that it is selfish to adopt at an age when it is unlikely to be possible to biologically parent.
And as a sibling who parented much younger siblings, while I am sure it will never happen and you will raise your children yourself, if heaven forbid it did happen, siblings can raise children they way their parents would have. Also, we kept our parents alive for our younger siblings in a way no other family members can.
I agree with you. Adopting has a more noble connotation to it. In adoption and fostering, you are taking an already existing kid from a not-so-pleasant situation and giving them a chance at a better life. With IVF, you are creating another mouth to feed for your own selfish desire to have a kid. You also risk the chance of severe birth defects, premature babies, etc.
If I woke up one day and decided that I wanted a child at 50 or whatever, I would adopt.
If you are intentionally becoming a parent past your mid 40s, you need to pay more than the usual attention to a support network. Hopefully, you are financially comfortable, and can provide for your child should the worst happen.
You'll also need to go out of your way to ensure that your child doesn't get shortchanged because their parents were physically too weak to get out there and play, or hike, or do whatever activities with them.I realize that there are plenty of 55 year olds who are very vigorous, and can handle it. Many aren't.
60+, with a newborn, and you chose this on purpose? I can't say I approve, period. But opinions aren't worth much, are they?
LOL, LOL, LOL!
Good grief, how old are you if I may ask? Do you know anyone 55? It doesn't sound like it, yet I bet you'd find that plenty of your co-workers are of that general age. Most 55 year olds are working their butts off in the workplace. That's as tiring as child care, believe me. I've done both! LOL again!
I'm on Mother Nature's side on this one. Mother Nature knows best- she says to give it up by the time we're in our 40's to early fifties. We're born with every egg we'll ever have and by 40's- early 50's they're stale and more likely to produce defective embryos.
It's beyond me why anyone would want to have a child in their 60's or 70's. Who has the energy? Who wants to try to deal with teenager angst 24/7 when you're in your 70's- 80's ??
Add to that they fact most people are retired from work or trying to retire. Where would you get the money to raise a child, send them to college etc. I also think parents should try to live long enough and be healthy and active enough to raise a child to adult hood. I just don't see the elderly doing that.
50's, 60's, 70's is time to be a grandparent. You play with them ,buy them things, have fun with them and when it gets to be too much, then you send them home.
Same here -- just go with menopause - that's your body's signal that it's time to quit having kids.
As for men, do they really want to die of old age when their children are toddlers? There is only so much we can negate mortality -- sure we all want to live for ever but that's not how it is.
Actually, a 65 year old male can expect, statistically, to live to be 82. A 65 year old woman can expect to live to be 85 (in the US). Of course, this means nothing for an individual person.
Men can reproduce forever, therefore nature must think it's not necessary to have a father around very long. (Not that I agree with this.) For me, having raised a family, and being in my 60s (youngest is 25), I don't think I'd want to have another baby. If I'd never done it, maybe I would. I do think, and this is just gut level, based on emotionalism, that age 60 should be the cutoff for the mom.
As far as being "old" parents, Alzheimer's can strike people in their 50s. People are living longer and healthier these days.
That's true -- maybe 2 or 3 years from menopause would be okay using the unnatural methods.
I know a woman who was extremely active, very fit and young appearing who had her only child at age 35 and then went into menopause but she died in her late 50s. She got her son grown and in college - but then it was all over -- very sad too because she was so vibrant and alive.
People really do age at different rates, some people might be quite fit and active into their 80s and could have a child at age 62 - but if you didn't want to have a child before age 50, what changed that you want to start at over age 60?
My mother was close to 40 when she had me. I always found her to be old fashioned, very controlling and restrictive about what I could/could not do. I can remember her saying a lot "when I was your age, I was playing with jacks". This was when I was in my early teens! She was old mentally. I had my children very young and had plenty of energy, but most importantly, was in touch with the world my kids and their friends were growing up in.
To have your children at an older age it is not enough to consider health, but also attitude. It makes a difference.
My mother was close to 40 when she had me. I always found her to be old fashioned, very controlling and restrictive about what I could/could not do. I can remember her saying a lot "when I was your age, I was playing with jacks". This was when I was in my early teens! She was old mentally. I had my children very young and had plenty of energy, but most importantly, was in touch with the world my kids and their friends were growing up in.
To have your children at an older age it is not enough to consider health, but also attitude. It makes a difference.
I've got news for you! Everyone thinks of their mom that way, even if there is only 15 years difference in their ages. Your kids may have a different perspective on how "in touch" you were. I say that as a parent of 20 somethings.
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