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His father died last year--I hope they are addressing that and it's most likely the cause of the depression and truancy. Cut the kid some slack. It's not easy to lose a parent. Maybe instead of taking the hard nose stand the mom could have some compassion for her son and get back to counseling, jointly and individually, to work through this with him.
Sounds like depression. When kids/teens suffer with depression they really don't even understand it. People think depression means constant sadness. And depression in young people is misunderstood as "laziness" in a lot of instances.
The mother needs to get him to a medical doctor and psychologist immediately. She can get doctors notes to protect herself from court action for the truancy. This will allow her to focus on the priority here....HER SONS STRUGGLE WITH HIS PROBLEM.
In the meantime it would be smart to remove all electronics, phones, etc. So the boy has nothing to keep him up all night or occupy him when he should be in school.
This is all great feedback, and I think each of you is right on track with the advice - except for the bullying. He's a nearly 6 foot tall 15 year old and participates in ROTC. he says ROTC is the only thing he does like about school. Bright kid, Depressed at losing his father. Single mom works full time and is an awesome, but I'm sure that's hard work. They live in major city with lots of resources. I think she's just looking for the right resource to get invovled.
I would make an appointment and speak with the JROTC staff. They were a Hugh positive influence on my son.
It appears the mom is already doing what most of you suggest:
1. She is working with the school, which has put him on a "truancy plan," which has certain milestones and consequences for not reaching those.
2. She has him in professional counseling to discuss depression and losing his father. Although I do not believe he is being medicated in any way.
3. She has spoken with the head of ROTC, but from what she tells me, the ROTC head has not gotten sufficiently involved. I suggested she push this option hard, as that appears to be the only "authority" who he will listen to.
4. She has taken away cell phone, laptop, changed the wireless key in the home, etc.
But now she shared a new item with me this morning. He is become physically aggressive with her. Last night, when she changed the wireless key in the home, he pinned her down, sat on her and poked her in the face multiple times asking her for the new code. To say this development is concerning, would be an understatement.
But now she shared a new item with me this morning. He is become physically aggressive with her. Last night, when she changed the wireless key in the home, he pinned her down, sat on her and poked her in the face multiple times asking her for the new code. To say this development is concerning, would be an understatement.
That is really disturbing. I think she should mention that to his counselor today and see if they have any suggestions.
I think she should also call the police and report it. The situation is already out of control and she needs to think about her safety and the safety of her other children.
3. She has spoken with the head of ROTC, but from what she tells me, the ROTC head has not gotten sufficiently involved. I suggested she push this option hard, as that appears to be the only "authority" who he will listen to.
The JROTC staff certainly differ from school to school. I know the "Colonel" in my son's school was a great guy and very active with his students. There is only much counselling they can do however.
But now she shared a new item with me this morning. He is become physically aggressive with her. Last night, when she changed the wireless key in the home, he pinned her down, sat on her and poked her in the face multiple times asking her for the new code. To say this development is concerning, would be an understatement.
At this point for his good and her safety she should have called the police.
I can't help but wonder if a male teacher/counselor has not tried to take advantage of the opportunity to try to become "close"after the loss of his Dad. That would be hard to tell mom about.
But now she shared a new item with me this morning. He is become physically aggressive with her. Last night, when she changed the wireless key in the home, he pinned her down, sat on her and poked her in the face multiple times asking her for the new code. To say this development is concerning, would be an understatement.
Oh holy crap... I'd be working on getting him out of the house.
It appears the mom is already doing what most of you suggest:
1. She is working with the school, which has put him on a "truancy plan," which has certain milestones and consequences for not reaching those.
2. She has him in professional counseling to discuss depression and losing his father. Although I do not believe he is being medicated in any way.
3. She has spoken with the head of ROTC, but from what she tells me, the ROTC head has not gotten sufficiently involved. I suggested she push this option hard, as that appears to be the only "authority" who he will listen to.
4. She has taken away cell phone, laptop, changed the wireless key in the home, etc.
But now she shared a new item with me this morning. He is become physically aggressive with her. Last night, when she changed the wireless key in the home, he pinned her down, sat on her and poked her in the face multiple times asking her for the new code. To say this development is concerning, would be an understatement.
No way. If he were mine, he would have been escorted out of my house wearing a nice set of silver bracelets. I understand he is grieving the loss of his father, but that is TOTALLY inappropriate. He needs to learn that serious actions have serious consequences. Maybe a few days in juvenile hall will do him some good.
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I would make an appointment and speak with the JROTC staff. They were a Hugh positive influence on my son.
At this point for his good and her safety she should have called the police.