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What I don't understand is why parents think that babies cannot manage something as natural, necessary and built in as sleep without massive gyrations.
Baby slept in our room until 6 months. We didn't kick her out into her own room, she gave us plenty of signs she was ready to go. We were getting to the point where our "noises" were disturbing her sleep, waking her and leaving her irritated in the morning. She now does 8 to 10 hour stretches in a blissful deep sleep snug as a bug in her own darkened room.
It's all about trying to tune into what your child needs, and that can vary.
It always amazes me what enrages people. I mean children in our world are starving, abused, displaced, orphaned...but your big stand is on newborns sleeping in their own room?
What I don't understand is why parents think that babies cannot manage something as natural, necessary and built in as sleep without massive gyrations.
Who is talking about "massive gyrations" here?
And yes, some babies do struggle with sleep. Breastfeeding is also natural, and it often doesn't come easy either. Just because something is "natural" doesn't mean it happens easily. And if you are referring to cosleeping as a "massive gyration," it actually is pretty natural. Many other cures around the world accept it as a matter of course. Cribs are pretty new inventions.
I actually started this thread a while ago, asking where people thought a newborn should sleep (as I'd heard different things from different people). The results were overwhelmingly in favor of a newborn sleeping in their parents bedroom.
With that said though, I think parents have to determine what is going to work best for them. My mother recently purchased a cosleeper for me to set up, so Johnny is going to be right next to me when he arrives late June / early July, at least for the first few months!
I'm still going to outfit the Nursery with a crib, changing table etc so he has somewhere to nap during the day, but at night I think that it will give me peace of mind knowing that my baby is safe and close. I realize that a baby sharing the bed has an increased risk of SIDS, but I don't think this will be an issue with a Cosleeper as the baby kind of has it's own space while still being next to me (if that makes sense).
Thankfully, an earthquake could hit and my husband would sleep through it, so he's not concerned at all about the baby being in our room as it's rare that anything will cause him to wake up during the night.
Overall- I think every parent, baby and family is different, and they have to do what's best for them.
I think the concept of having a child in a separate nursery is becoming a more old fashioned idea nowadays- a lot more parents seem to be going the attachment parenting route. My husband and I will be doing a mix of attachment and traditional parenting ideals with our baby and other future children, basically a combination of 'the best of the best' the way we see it
You have the right idea--let each family decide what's best for them and leave it at that.
It is better for the child to be closer to the parent, To hear the voice,smell the scent, and have the comfort of knowing for the child that the parent is close by.
If the child goes to sleep, it is unlikely that he is emotionally distressed.
I don't know what was said in the OP, but the newborn couldn't care less about being close to us. It was more about our own comfort in knowing its ok at every hour. We put the crib right next to us for almost 2 years. Now they (twins) are almost 5 and have no problems being on their own. Never did.
I don't think it's harmful for the baby to sleep in a different room from the parents but I do find it odd and unnecessary. My family is from Sweden and babies having their own rooms is pretty much unheard of there. Babies always sleep in the parents' room. Not in the same bed but in a crib next to the bed. My younger brother slept in a basket on my mother's bed as a baby. It made it much easier to breast feed him during the night. There is no need to get up to feed the baby; just pick him up from the basket, put the baby next to you, nurse, and put him back. That seems much more practical and less taxing for the mother than to have to get out of bed and go to another room to get the baby several times per night.
The idea of having a whole room for a little baby seems very strange and excessive to me. They don't need it. Of course if parents wants to have their baby in their own room there is nothing wrong with that. It appears to be rather typical among middle class American families so it's most likely just a matter of cultural differences. Neither practice is in any way bad parenting as the OP claims.
Having exhausted cranky parents is worse for a newnborn than sleeping in their own room.
We fell for te keep the baby in your room thing with our first babies for about a week. then we fond a better doctor who told us it was crazy. She also told us to put them on our schedule, no demand feeding or sleep when they want to . It worked like a charm, we felt better, we could drive more safely, our brains worked better, everyhting was better for th ebabies. Sleep is important, especiall for a new mom recovering from pregnancy.
Having exhausted cranky parents is worse for a newnborn than sleeping in their own room.
We fell for te keep the baby in your room thing with our first babies for about a week. then we fond a better doctor who told us it was crazy. She also told us to put them on our schedule, no demand feeding or sleep when they want to . It worked like a charm, we felt better, we could drive more safely, our brains worked better, everyhting was better for th ebabies. Sleep is important, especiall for a new mom recovering from pregnancy.
If your pedi recommended not to feed a one week old on demand, then she was going against recommendation from the American Academy of Pediatrics.
The link is about disputing the book Babywise, but the points are all there.
Also, if breastfeeding, it's critical to feed a baby on demand to establish and keep up milk supply. So if breastfeeding, this would be incredibly dangerous advice.
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