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That's the reality of choosing a town that doesn't "fit". If there aren't many working moms, thenyou won't be accommodated. It's not ideal, but it's that simple. Where there are mostly SAHM's, weekends (and evenings)are often reserved for family. We've lived in both types of places; neither is better, but it helps if you fit with the norm.
OK I wave the white flag! The whole point was missed I did speak with some of the other moms they also would prefer weekends due to the fact they would not have to worry about care for their smaller children etc. My whole point was the person who stays at home (which I have done before and made sure not to leave out working parents when it came to things of this nature) this a reward for all they have earned all year. which I got her to all of that stuff. Did not offer a weekend date to choose from. No one got to pick a weekend date! All I was saying was put it out there for everyone to vote on with both weekend and week day. I would never ask someone to miss work or a family vacation for a water park for a day. Really can not compare those things
While I think the focus on who is being rewarded is nonsense and a little sour grapes, I wonder why you are bringing up to US that there should have been some discussion but rather to the troop leaders? Hav you spoken to any of them?
I would worry more about my child if the outing was scheduled over the weekend, which is likely to be far more crowded than during the week.
In the past, I have been more than happy to supervise the child of working parents so they didn't miss out on an activity. It works well when the two kids are good friends anyway, so they want to stick together. it really isn't that hard to watch an extra child under those circumstance, so I would ask rather than disappoint my child.
I am not looking to start a united front it will not help. There are only two working moms the other mom who would prefer weekend has a smaller child and likes weekend so as not to have to find a sitter. I live in an area where not many moms work. I was trying to understand the mind set since when I was in their shoes and did not work I would still think about the other side. If they would have offered both weekend and weekday and weekday was picked I would not be posting. It was more of a am I missing something type of thought then lets start a war.
So you have already decided not to speak to the troop leaders, deciding instead to try and understand THEIR "mindset" by asking a bunch of strangers on the internet. No one will know their mindset better than they will. I suspect if you spoke to them with politeness and respect in the name of common understanding, they would likely, at very least, explain their mindset. Rather you have chosen to get your knickers in a twist. Does not seem like good problem solving to me.
To the OP: it seems to me that you are ” venting” here. I get it. I have a 9 year old who does GS and most of their activities have been right after school when I am still at work. When you are ready to listen to suggestions, mine are as follows:
1) Nicely ask the troop leader if a weekend date was considered or could be considered. Point out your situation and also that sahm may appreciate being able to take only their GS and not their other children or that dads may want to go.
2) Reconsider asking another parent to watch your child along with theirs. 8 years old is not so young. This is a.group activity. A 1:1 child to adult ratio should not be necessary, except for children who are poor swimmers, perhaps. Our school does an annual weekday at a local amusement park, and parents frequently take responsibility for their kids' friends whose parents are working. IMHO, sometimes you just have to ask for help and let go.
I do not want to push my child on anyone at an event such as this. If anything would happen that person would feel awful and so would I
Fair enough, but I doubt most people would feel like you were "pushing your child on them" -- especially if you proactively offered to take their kid(s) somewhere for a comparable amount of time on a weekend. People would understand that you can't necessarily just take off and I don't think they'd want your daughter to miss out.
Thankfully there's a lot of give and take in my community regarding working moms. If activities need to be scheduled in the week, it's a given that the SAHM's will help out with the kids of the working parents. It's not rocket science, just part and parcel of being part of a community.
Thankfully there's a lot of give and take in my community regarding working moms. If activities need to be scheduled in the week, it's a given that the SAHM's will help out with the kids of the working parents. It's not rocket science, just part and parcel of being part of a community.
If all the working moms decline both dates it won't be much of an outing. talk to the troop leaders. Talk to the other moms. If it is an ongoing problem and nothing changes, maybe you could find a different troop. you can only do what you can do.
For the person who thought I did not speak to the troop leader I did. She just said those are the dates. I explained my side thinking it was just an oversight that they did not think about people who worked since there are not many at all. I thought it first it may have been because the thought process would be a weekend is more crowded then a weekday. I understand that except I would think the weekend before schools get out would not be anymore crowded then the first full day school is out. Just my mind thought may or may not be correct. I am not bitter so those comments are not warranted. I was just trying to understand the mindset. I have been on both sides and always considered both working and non working. I would be more comfortable if the event was closer its a hour and a half away. That's just me. If it were event 20 minutes away it would make me more comfortable. Besides its a water park. Seems like some people want an argument. that's not my intention as I have said several times I was trying to understand the mind set or though process. I have spoken with people that are sahm and they said they would have preferred the weekend too so they would have to take their younger children. Everyone will be bringing siblings so each parent has around 3 kids. NOONE in my group would want to start an argument about it. It was brought up to the troop leader and it is not an option. She controls the purse strings on the funds and she ran the troop so at this point it is what it is.
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