Middle School Principal says strapless gown not allowed at dance (children, 15 year old)
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If you're shopping around for a school that allows strapless clothes, you're probably going to be shopping for awhile. Most schools I've come across don't allow them.
If thats what a parent wants to base their school choices off of, whether or not their child can wear strapless clothes, then they need to rethink their priorities.
..from what I can tell it is a very small district, at least compared to the one we live in. There is only one middle school. I doubt the decision to ban strapless dresses was made in secret, with no other school officials knowing, prior to the complaints of the one mother. I'd also almost bet that the decision was made after some sort of fiasco with dress at a previous function.
It was in NJ, and we have MANY, MANY, small districts. Which is why our property taxes are so damn high.
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Originally Posted by Larkspur123
Our school board rarely gets involved in these sorts of issues. The superintendent in our district would more than likely be the one to reverse any such decision, although that would be doubtful.
Some school boards here do get involved in crap like this. I agree, it is not a school board issue. If a parent does not like the dress code, then the kid doesn't go to the dance. I think the dress code is a bit misguided (I feel there are far worse things being worn to school dances then strapless), but if that is the rule, then it is what it is.
M
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Originally Posted by Larkspur123
y guess would be, that if she did not come back solely based on the hearsay comments alone, she was given a generous package to leave. The public would not be privy to all the negotiations that happened behind closed doors Or her contract status hadn't been decided for the upcoming year. Districts aren't as quick to fire staff as one might think.
She probably won't get fired, but she may get reassigned elsewhere. You would be surprised how often that type of thing could happen. We just had a principal reassigned for making a "bad" decision (not quite as dumb as this), but parents complained en masse, and now she is in another school....
Would I want my middle school daughter to wear something provcative? No.
But it's my job as a parent to decide that, not the schools.
Besides, since when is it the female's job to control the male's behavior with what she wears?
This is a very slippery slope.
Males should be held accountable for their own behavior.
Absolutely. This is along the same line as "You shouldn't teach girls to dress so they won't be raped, you should teach boys not to rape."
Some religions are (excuse me) hell-bent on girls from a very young age keeping their shoulders and arms covered because they might become "walking pornography (honest!) for a boy. Time for boys and men to control themselves and grow up.
Absolutely. This is along the same line as "You shouldn't teach girls to dress so they won't be raped, you should teach boys not to rape."
Some religions are (excuse me) hell-bent on girls from a very young age keeping their shoulders and arms covered because they might become "walking pornography (honest!) for a boy. Time for boys and men to control themselves and grow up.
I think way too much is being made of the principal's comments. I think her remarks about the boys were inappropriate. However, I do think that she was speaking off the cuff, and didn't think about what she was saying. It happens.
I think trying to bring religion into this is making a mountain out of a molehill. This is about a dress code for a dance. I don't think middle schoolers, even 14 yo middle schoolers, need to be buying formal dresses for an end of year dance.
In this day of too much too soon for so many young people I'm pleased to see some boundaries. Eighth grade is pretty young. Something they can look forward too in High School.
I guess I just assumed that was obvious. When I'm planning anything with my family we look at the venue, weather, what to wear, times, etc. together. Isn't that what most people do?
I think people have different ideas of how that discussion should go. Some would discuss what type of dress is allowed and why. Some would discuss why the rule is stupid and how to try to get around it.
I think way too much is being made of the principal's comments. I think her remarks about the boys were inappropriate. However, I do think that she was speaking off the cuff, and didn't think about what she was saying. It happens.
I think trying to bring religion into this is making a mountain out of a molehill. This is about a dress code for a dance. I don't think middle schoolers, even 14 yo middle schoolers, need to be buying formal dresses for an end of year dance.
I think it is appropriate. To teach girls from a very young age as part of "religion" that their bodies are shameful and a source of sin to the superior sex is to set them up for a lifetime of self-esteem, body issues and second-class citizenship. Barefoot, pregnant, covered and submissive as your lot in life is abuse and starts with kids a lot younger than eighth graders. As someone who spent ten years as a member of a religious community, I've seen this in action; decisions like this are generally based on religious standards.
In my opinion, of course.
On the other hand, I agree with you that the principal may have been speaking off the cuff and didn't expect the reaction she got, but often when we speak "off the cuff" it reflects our truest attitudes.
I think it is appropriate. To teach girls from a very young age as part of "religion" that their bodies are shameful and a source of sin to the superior sex is to set them up for a lifetime of self-esteem, body issues and second-class citizenship. Barefoot, pregnant, covered and submissive as your lot in life is abuse and starts with kids a lot younger than eighth graders. As someone who spent ten years as a member of a religious community, I've seen this in action; decisions like this are generally based on religious standards.
In my opinion, of course.
On the other hand, I agree with you that the principal may have been speaking off the cuff and didn't expect the reaction she got, but often when we speak "off the cuff" it reflects our truest attitudes.
Did the principal bring religion into this discussion? Not from anything I read. Nor did she talk about "barefoot, pregnant, covered and submissive as your lot in life". Good gravy!
Did the principal bring religion into this discussion? Not from anything I read. Nor did she talk about "barefoot, pregnant, covered and submissive as your lot in life". Good gravy!
You're right. I've over-read-into this. I acknowledge I am overly invested.
You're right. I've over-read-into this. I acknowledge I am overly invested.
At least you realize that.
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