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She is/was caught between being a mom, having to advise him on "the right way" to navigate teen matters, and remembering her own choices during her own teen years, which she obviously has many regrets about.
Watching him grow up is a constant reminder of her own lack - What she missed out on, and what she's still missing.
Irish, repressed anger is a b*tch to deal with because it makes that person unable (and even unwilling) to empathize with others.
She's too pissed about her own life to feel sorry for anything she said while drunk.
It's repressed anger according to the counselor. This anger that feels( felt) robbed of the totality of her " young" years gets taken out on him and I.
That may be true but that's not the only thing wrong with her. Has the counselor touched upon her manipulative and spiteful behavior as well?
How about you? What does the counselor say about your behavior and how you placated her all the time by "buying" her good behavior and affection with gifts, dinners out and weekend trips? And what does he suggest you do now when she acts up?
That may be true but that's not the only thing wrong with her. Has the counselor touched upon her manipulative and spiteful behavior as well?
How about you? What does the counselor say about your behavior and how you placated her all the time by "buying" her good behavior and affection with gifts, dinners out and weekend trips? And what does he suggest you do now when she acts up?
He has touched on her spiteful behavior and told her to realize that it is hurting her family. He told me the best way to get affection is to give affection and really listen to her and talk to her
He has touched on her spiteful behavior and told her to realize that it is hurting her family. He told me the best way to get affection is to give affection and really listen to her and talk to her
Give affection? How about a slap upside the head( rhetorically speaking) by packing your bags?
Irish, you have put up with a lot. I am usually on the side of the wife when I read about situations such as yours, until kids are involved. Sometimes, the best action is to split.
Give affection? How about a slap upside the head( rhetorically speaking) by packing your bags?
Irish, you have put up with a lot. I am usually on the side of the wife when I read about situations such as yours, until kids are involved. Sometimes, the best action is to split.
yup, I agree. However, it would most likely financially devastate Irish, considering she has not held a job all this time. Irish, you ought to just live a separate life while living in the same house. See how fast she snaps into reality (or not).
Hmm....what do you think? This sounds a bit different than her usual, "take me to dinner so I know you love me, and I need stuff" kind of demand.
Based on her past behavior, I would guess she's going to try to bring the MC and therapy sessions to an end. She'll say, "I've been nice for a couple of weeks. We don't have a problem. The counseling is a waste of time and money." I sincerely hope that is not the case. Can you stick to your plan to continue counseling without falling prey to her denials? When she insists counseling is unnecessary can you calmly and TRUTHFULLY explain why you disagree? She really doesn't get that there is a problem with her behavior that will not be solved in a few weeks of being nice.
Irish--If you could have your "dream" marriage, what would that look like? Does it involve more than a wife that is nice? Does it involve an adult, mature partnership with honest communication? I guess what I'm trying to ask is this: is the dream marriage based on superficial, fleeting things or is it based upon substantial, meaningful sharing and understanding? You seriously need to answer these questions for yourself.
oh for heaven's sake... Tell her you can two can talk at home. Geez...
this!
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