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That's exactly what we had, we put a toddler bed into the space for the bottom bunk, because their bedroom at the time was only 10x10 and we wanted to maximize floor space. We gave her a little lamp to light the space her bed was in, and put glow-in-the-dark stars on the underside of the top bunk. We acted like giving her the new bed was a reason for a celebration, had some cupcakes while sitting on the new bed, etc. so she would think it was exciting and not a punishment.
I know desperate times call for desperate measures, but there's no way that you should be giving a kid benadryl to sleep because she insists on it. This seems wrong in so many ways.
Her doctor said it was fine. I had asked about giving her melatonin, which I take to sleep and have for years (I have chronic pain issues that interfere with sleep), and he said just to continue with the benadryl, now and then when she needs it.
I believe the OP should take the child in for a complete check-up and explain the sleeping problem especially all the movement, kicking, etc. The jealousy toward the baby is going to be over-the-top unless the OP gets a handle on it. Not getting sufficient sleep is also not good for the mother-to-be.
I would be opposed to giving a child benedryl for them to sleep since it has some undesirable side effects and can be on the addictive side. Always make sure when you use over-the-counter and prescription medications to do your own research online. Think "medication nation" and how much easier it is to just pop a pill versus looking for the cause of something.
My sister did the separate bed in the master bedroom. Her daughter didn't leave for her own room until she was 10 years old. No joke. Psychotherapy at Children's Hospital was necessary to get her out of their bedroom.
I don't care how much breastfeeding you do. Don't make the same mistake with the new baby on the way. My sister (different sister) and BIL haven't had their own bedroom in 16 years. It took the birth of new children to move children out of their room. One after the other. Currently, their youngest is in there. I think he's 3 years old.
I opt for the cry it out version. It's faster. But you can't cave. If you cave it won't work and will take forever. If you're concerned about the heart condition, talk to the doctor first, but I highly suspect your child is healthy enough to survive a temper tantrum. Your life is going to be hell in more ways than sleeping if you don't learn that. I've seen an 8 year old (my neighbor's child) having toddler level temper tantrums constantly, repeatedly because the parents gave into everything to keep her calm. Insanity!
I agree with everyone else that you need to find out why the child doesn't sleep well. He might have apnea or something.
That is how my sister eventually gets all of her children out of her room when she's pregnant with a new baby. Do it now, before the birth. It might help to put him in a room with the older sibling instead of in his own room. That's also how my sister does it. The one leaving her room goes into a room with the next oldest. The oldest in that room goes on to having his own room. It's musical rooms but it really makes everyone happy. The older children get to move into their own rooms, and the youngest child being kicked out of the parents room goes into a room with a sibling instead of being alone.
That is how my sister eventually gets all of her children out of her room when she's pregnant with a new baby. Do it now, before the birth. It might help to put him in a room with the older sibling instead of in his own room. That's also how my sister does it. The one leaving her room goes into a room with the next oldest. The oldest in that room goes on to having his own room. It's musical rooms but it really makes everyone happy. The older children get to move into their own rooms, and the youngest child being kicked out of the parents room goes into a room with a sibling instead of being alone.
Sounds great, the boys get along really well too, so I hope this works!
at almost 2 he should understand "all grown up" talk. We've been able to progressively get our twins out of our bed, and into their own room (with us staying there) and now without either of us staying there, all by having them understand it's what big boys do. It doesn't happen overnight, but you get them closer and closer to the idea at each try and when they're ready they will give it a go on their own. I know all kids are different, but that's what worked for us. Next step is to get them to separate from each other. One of them is ready, but the other is not ready to let him go. You can also try rewards for progression. Out of your bed and into the toddler bed, he gets something. Bribery is great (I fear saying that on here though).
Two options, one is most likely quicker, the other longer...
1. This is the longer way, but what we had to do with our youngest who had a lot of sleep troubles. We set her bed up in our room so she had her own space while still being nearby. This lasted for nearly a year and then we slowly transitioned her to her own room. It was basically a way to take things one step at a time. First, you get out of our bed, but you get to stay in our room in your own bed. Then, your bed magically makes its way into your room. Step one is always disassociating your bed as where they sleep in the least combative way possible.
2. Sleep in their room with them. If the connection is more to the person, then setup a bed that mommy or daddy can sleep in with them in their own room. This way when they fall asleep mommy or daddy can get up and go back to their own room. Slowly transition from laying with them in their bed, to laying next to their bed on the floor, to sitting by the door, etc. If you can get them to be in their own room, even if you have to stay with them for a while, it's the quicker option than doing the whole their bed in your room thing.
I agree with these, as well as with the suggestion to see if he would like to sleep with his older brother. For a kid who is used to co-sleeping, it may be easier to transition him to a room or even a bed with a sibling rather than into one alone. My kids share a room, and while they have separate beds, they often choose to share a bed.
Don't fear saying it. Bribery has its place. Many call it "rewarding good behavior."
Doesn't always work. We tried everything, sticker charts, bribery, pleading, ignoring, begging, following the book Solving Your Child's Sleep Problems, her pediatrician's advice.........none of it worked. She was also our second child (didn't have this problem with the first). Finally her pediatrician told us to stop worrying and that at some point, she would sleep in her own bed. She did, at about age 3 1/2. In the meantime, we just kept playing "musical beds." We knew two other families who went through the same thing.
To be honest, once they're adults, you look back at something like this and realize that it was a minor problem, compared to all that you'll face when they're teenagers. (I wish I'd known that then.)
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